What I hate about drinking!!!!

[Determinator]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

leaning over the handrail of my back fence barfing out of my nose, yet STILL have the damned bottle in my hand. look up and notice the neighbor waving at me.

ick.

[Determinator]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

Akinaa, no more drink driving!!!! really!!. if you hurt yourself or others it can be really bad. it's not worth it dear. we shall overcome this

[Cinders]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

Hmmm.

The blackouts.

The hubby being called because his responsible and very drunk wife can't handle whatever situation she is in. (Kicked off a plane for God's sakes!! In the bar and they can't wake me up, ummm, crap, you name it and what the hell have I done!!!! My husband absolutely does not deserve this!!)

Liver pain. Okay, I am probably already screwed but I want to beat this anyway..

The sadness, my hubby's worry and concern (going to lose that soon if I don't do this right, just 32 years...and the true love of my life. yikes!! Wine is more important than THAT???), my children's worry and my parent's worry.

I always realize that my actions hurt those I love. I HATE THAT!! and it makes me hate myself.

Love,
Cindi

[Hope Emily]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

Realizing that hitting bottom could be far worse than a DUI.

Knowing the potential of seeing a photo of myself bathing my precious 9 month old grandson and not remembering the experience. . .

[Deena]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

Good thread, I can relate to many posts here. I am a closet drinker, my husband has no clue I'm nipping vodka every night.

What I hate about drinking?

Writing notes to myself before I "go to bed/pass out" so I remember what discussions I had with my hubby and kids.

Sitting in meetings at work in the AM and not being sharp.

Not allowing my kids to go out to the movies at night unless another parent will drive them home, so I can have my drinking time.

Sneaking vodka into the house by pouring it into other bottles in my car, tossing the vodka bottles into public trash cans and wondering if anyone saw me.

Knowing I will never find true happiness if I continue to drink. I am facing my "2nd adulthood" ... how do I want to spend it?

Looking at other women my age and wishing I could just have a normal life in the evenings like they do.


Rock bottom? I agree with whomever posted it earlier, we define it ourselves. I don't think we have to "hit it" before we succeed in beating this. Having a list of reasons we hate it should be enough reason to motivate us.

[Masquerade]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

What I Hate About Drinking

1. Thinking I am "smarter" than the effects of Vodka. Doesn't everybody burn a Weight Watcher pizza to a charred frisbee and set off all the smoke detectors?
2. Being sanctimonious enough to "give up" the imported Grey Goose for Lent. God knows what a sacrifice it is for me to drink the American varieties ... *eyeroll*.
3. Realizing the "Google Earth" has captured my neighborhood on camera (as I pray to God that it wasn't during one of my moments where I was sunburning my nekkid butt as I lay face-first in my backyard).
4. Making excuses. There are WAYYY too many for this list. My most detested was blaming "sleepwalking" (aka BLACKOUT) for someone making tuna salad during the night ... I awoke to find the bowl in my lap and my fork stuck in the leather chair.
5. Drunk-dialing ... enough said.
6. Being too chicken-sh!t to face my demons.
7. Finding liquid courage in Vodka ... to become comfortably numb.
8. Lying to myself and others.
9. Cheating in life, love, and trust.
10. Stealing moments and memories that I can't re-capture ... EVER.

[Helensback]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

The shame.

God help me, the shame.

[dexterhead]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

i am with you. god, the shame.

[mountainmama]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

1 Mystery bruises on my legs and arms. I want them gone.
2 Not remembering who I called, or what we talked about. Apparently, I erase the call record on my cell right after I hang up, & I don't remember doing it.
3 Saying very hateful things to my husband and his family/friends, and not remembering what I said, or why they all are avoiding me now.
4 Using my TV as a babysitter for my children, while I drink my life away.
5 Not leaving the house for the weekend, because I'm too drunk to drive/go anywhere
6 My mom & dad's pity for me, as they offer me another beer
7 Knowing I have to give this up, and I may not be as "fun" to be around as everyone thinks I am ~ God, will anyone ever want to be around me again?
8 Yeah, I've felt the liver pain too. So scarey!
9 Not being able to get out of bed to help get my kids ready, and my husband looking at me with disgust saying he just wants his wife back...ouch
10. I will not miss feeling worthless and like I would rather be drunk than alive. Such shame.

[bootcampbarbie]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

wow, what a great thread.... makes you wonder after reading everything why anyone would chose that.... tis crazy.. i remember a beautiful line someone said to me once and i remember it everyday. how you know you hit bottom? when you stop digging. some are lower than others.
i can just say ditto to what everyone has shared.
missing out on quality time with my hubby, friends, children and dogs
sudden ugly mood swings....
spending time with people i have absolutely no interest in
drunk texting or emails
getting upset with people i'd never get upset with otherwise
having my husband see me as a science project that desperately needs fixing
being sad and hopeless.
staying up way too late and then not wanting to do anything the next day
all the work outs it cuts into
the health it steels away
the lives it has cost me, friendships i'll never have again...
having to hide anything at anytime
here's to love and peace in life and
AF all the way.....

[John]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

How about this one.....calculating how much money spent every month on alcohol and realizing that if saved it will send your child to college or could mean the difference in the monthly payment between a Honda and Mercedes or making donations that would help countless others.

[Shikakai]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

John;247598 wrote: How about this one.....calculating how much money spent every month on alcohol and realizing that if saved it will send your child to college or could mean the difference in the monthly payment between a Honda and Mercedes or making donations that would help countless others.

Um hmmm... drinking is an expensive habit. Not as expensive as crack or gambling (my cousin blew $40,000 this year in gambling debts), but it's high enough wherein you could have taken a few trips to the Bahamas!

[Shikakai]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

keeper;236100 wrote: 8. Not remembering phone conversations. I called my Mom once on Mother's Day to wish her a happy day and she said I'd called the night before to wish her a Happy Mother's Day. No recollection of that phone call at all. Scary!

Yea, I don't even talk to people on the phone and try not to even communicate with anyone when I'm having a "moment" because I won't remember it the next day.

I checked my phone this morning to see if I called anyone last night. Thank God I didn't.

I saw my sister had called late last night and I thought maybe I had called her earlier in the evening. I'm glad that wasn't the case.

[Shikakai]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

Reenie;236164 wrote: I didn't hit rock bottom, but what has lead me to stop drinking (158 days AF) are:

1. The worry & concern My drinking had caused my family.
2. Nasty hangovers
3. Embarrassing my husband.
4. Embarassing myself
5. Pigging out on food in my drunken stupir.
6. Falling on my front walkway while splitting my ear and being found by a neighbor in a pool of blood. Needed stitches.
7. Falling on my boat dock while splitting my chin. Needed stitches.
8. Falling asleep with candles lit in my house.
9. Arguing with my husband for no apparent reason.
10. Taking down last years Christmas tree by throwing the whole thing outside with decortaions, lights and all.
11. Not knowing the Real Me

LOL @ the Christmas tree "removal"

Yes, I have fallen a couple of times. I fell BACKWARDS down my concrete steps going to my apartment. Somehow made it into the apartment only to wake up in bed in my clothes and the back of my sweater soaked in blood because I had split the back of my head open and didn't know it. I don't even remember the incident!

Hair has just begun to grow back there again.

Like you, eating with abandonment all the things I'm not supposed to. Funny, when I was younger I drank not to eat. Everything is the reverse now as I've gotten older.

[Shikakai]

What I hate about drinking!!!!

Finding Me;236207 wrote: I have drank pretty heavily since my teens. I am now forty -- I wonder how I get to know the real me!

Lost Time would then be one to add to the list! Lost time with children, families, friends....life.

Um hmmm... I don't know the real me and probably never have. Lots of lost time... what a waste.