Emotional tough day

[GodsGirl]

Just starting today and feeling a lot of guilt and shame. We paid all our bills for the month and Christmas is just around the corner. My husband is off and we are hanging out at home. No money left for anything as I lost my job early this month due to my drinking and poor choices. How selfish. Blessed we are to have no children. My husband is truly a saint and hanging in here with me "hey we paid the bills who cares if we have to eat pasta with butter for a week and play chess every night" what a champion.."my wife is getting better and that's all I care about" I love him so much and hate what I have done. I know that we are so much better off than others but...is that the selfishness coming out? I think I am just scared and getting away from living ODAT. I know I am rambling. Need too. Nothing to drink since 11/28/07 no desire for some time now Topamax since then too. Losing weight he's concerned about this. Just needed to talk. Thank you.

GG

[dexterhead]

Emotional tough day

GG: thanks for your post. I am proud of you for being AF nearly a month. Do I ever wish I were in your shoes in that respect ... I am sitting here hungover, full of self-loathing, disgusted that I can't seem to make the strides that others here do. You have a wonderful husband .. that is a blessing. My marriage blew up a couple years ago and my drinking certainly contributed to that. I'm trying to motivate myself .. place is a giant mess and still haven't finished Xmas shopping. You are not selfish .. this is a damned tough time of year. Now I 'm just whining about myself Anyway, happy holidays GG, we'll get through this. !
D.

[chardan-not]

Emotional tough day

Hang in there

My hubby and I are both in this together as far as both of us drinking and stopping at the same time. We were our own worst 'enablers', now we support each other. We are going through some financial crap too, sick dog=vet bill, a re-fi that has come as a nessacery evil to get ourselves out of a crappy situtation caused by a crook of a mortgage broker. Christmas is on the back burner for right now as far as and excess spending. Our daughter is 22 but still lives at home and she understands. We don't have a pile of other family members to shop for so this is good.
Just a word of caution for the upcoming days and weeks of being AF. Your husband is a wonderful support system for you. Try, try, try not to wear out that support by jumping back on the wagon. Too many times, and he might not be there for the last time. We all have our limits - even those who love you dearly.

[memarcie]

Emotional tough day

Sounds like you are doing very well with the drinking GG. Money issues suck don't they. I racked up quite a few credit card bills while drinking. Keep up the good work its great your hubby supports you in this.