Hello and Happy New Year to all! I am brand new to this type of thing. I have pretty much known that I am an alcoholic since the day I turned 21. That is because I come from a family of a long line of alcoholics and I realize now that I would have been better off not drinking at all. I have allways told myself that I can control my drinking. That works for awhile and then I fall right back into my normal habits. I have had 2 DUII's and blackout's (one I know of, because we video taped that night.) I have never missed work because of my drinking, but have messed relationships up. I am doing pretty well now, I have only been drinking 2 to 3 beers a night (every night) or a couple of glasses of wine. I still think I have a problem even though I am not drinking much in a day. I feel like I should not have to have a drink every day. There is hardly a day that goes by that I don't have a drink. I did not drink New Year's Eve, that makes one day in about a month that I did not drink. Wel I am now really trying(still drinking). I am taking Kudzu and other vitamins to help me. I guess this is a good start. I do however have another problem in my home that might hinder my progress however. My boyfreind and father of our 2 month old baby, drink's heavily. He drinks about a gallon of wiskey in about 1 or 2 weeks( I have not figured out how much, but is a lot). He knows I do not like it and have told him not to drink it at night when he has to take care of the baby the next day. I feel this is not going to help me, because I will see him drinking and will want to drink. But I am still determined to quit drinking all together. Not just for my health, but also for my 3 children. I hope I will have sucess in quitting and I really think that this sight will also help me because of all of the people who are in the same boat as I. I welcome any and all comments on my situation. I actually would not mind some suggestions, because I really do not know what to do.
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Advice Welcome
Hi and :welcome:
You have come to a great place. Read, read and read some more. Download or buy the book. Some people take the topa, others the supplements/cd's. Do whatever feels right for you, the support is there. Join in on the different boards. There is a ODAT (one day at a time) site over in Newbies, lots of different 30 Day threads, moderation and abstinance threads. Good luck and looking forward to seeing you around.
Rustop -
Advice Welcome
JBJ -
Rustop has it right on. You need to hit this on many levels with a rounded approach.
There is so much support here.
Welcome!
Dx* * I love Determinator * *Comment
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Advice Welcome
Welcome Jelly Bean!
I have to ditto everyone else- it really helps to read. In addition to Roberta Jewel's book, I've read several other books about sobriety.
There is Susan Powter's book, "Sober, and Staying that Way"; Jean Kirkpatrick's, "Goodbye Hangovers, Hello Life"; and Caroline Knapp's "Drinking, A Love Story". (I found most of them on Amazon.com at reduced prices).
The common thread among these four ladies: they are all strong, independent and successful women (according to society's standards). Most of them focus on alcoholism being a genetic trait, and not a character flaw.
The hardest thing for me to do is NOT preach to my husband when he pours himself a drink. Even though I haven't drank since Thanksgiving, he still makes his nightly rum and coke. He knows that I'm consciously not drinking, and he's been very supportive- he hasn't tried to sabotage my efforts with a casual offer of a beer, and when he's done with his last drink for the evening, he empties his glass in the sink.... (before, he would bring it to bed and drink part of it.... and the Magical Drink Fairy:wings: used to swoop down on that drink and carry it over to my side of the bed..... leaving it to spoil is "Alcohol Abuse", right?
)
Anyway, I'd let your boyfriend know that this is important for you to do. Ask for his support, but try not to be pushy with your new-found awakening. As he sees the changes in you, he may decide for himself that he should change, too. Just as you are making this journey, he has to create his own path, too.
Lastly, I really commend you for recognizing that alcohol is controlling your life. You sound like your younger than me (I'm 43), and my drinking became progressively worse over the last 5 - 7 years. When I look at pictures of my 10 year old son, I realize that I've short changed him.... I did not give him 100% of my love, I gave him what was leftover (after Mr. A :alf: got his share)......... your kids are younger, and you are giving them a chance to know the REAL you. That, Jelly Bean, is a wonderful blessing. :heart:
Good Luck,
Patty
Tampa, FLComment
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Advice Welcome
Hi Jelly Bean Jod, and welcome,
You'll fit right in here. We all came here for the same reason. Our habitual daily drinking over many many years turned into an alcohol addiction, and yes alcholism runs in many of our families. So here we are, all on a journey together to fight the beast. If you can, get RJ's book, read it, and decide what is best for you. I personally don't want to use any drugs to stop my addiction....just don't like the idea. I just take my own liguid mega vitamins, liquid b-complex, liguid calcium/magnesium, l-glutamine, and rely solely on my wanting go alcohol free for 30 days with the wonderful support from this great bunch of people. But anyway, it's a fight worth fighting. Good luck to you and hope to see you around, and read, and read, and read some more. You will get inspired
Miss October :blinkylove:Comment
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Advice Welcome
Welcome JellyBeanJod! As the others have said, this is a great place. Take lots of vitamins, eat well and drink lots of water. Keep posting and read often. It truly is a "one day at a time' thing.Comment
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Advice Welcome
Thank You
Hi all,
Thank you all so much for the comments. Well it's been 2 days and no drink! I feel really good and I feel the cravings subsidind some now. I appreciate the mention of books, I love to read. I have one now that is called "Beyond the Influence". This looks like a real good book. Anyway, thanks again and I plan on reading and chatting with you all. I feel this will be a lot of help. :thanks:
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Advice Welcome
great job and welcome....drinking a love story ... and dry are 2 of my favorite getting sober books...stick around and keep up the great work! Blessings, buckleComment
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Advice Welcome
just think about not drinking today
So many years I worried I can't go without a drink my whole life so I put off stopping
but I realized I don't have to not drink my whole life just one day today!
Maybe someday I can drink again but just not this day, every morning I tell myself that and it helps it is not such a big commitment, the times that are the hardest,:welcome: plan something for that time, like posting here
9 AF days and loving myself
PlumeriasigpicComment
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Advice Welcome
Thank You
Thanks Plumeria,
That is good advice. That is kind of what I have been doing now. It is when I get home from work when I desire a drink the most. Lately I have been pretty tiresd when I get home and tell myself I don't need the drink. This has been working. I have made it 4 days now AF. I really beleive I can stay AF for good! Again thanks for the advice and welcome.
:thanks:Comment
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Advice Welcome
I want to add my welcome to you JellyBeanJod, and also to you Plumeria, you are both doing so well! I have read that if a big craving hits you can open up the l-glutamine and sprinkle under the tongue to tackle it right away. Not that I've done it but I am going to so will let you know. :welcome:The more we appreciate life, the more life appreciates and bestows us with more goodness.Comment
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