Day 18 19

[JackieO]

Hello all,
I have just started program and am on day 20. My goal is to be moderate. I did 12 days AF and then had a glass of wine on day 13. Felt great, one glass was all I wanted and I was very happy to make it through a couple of weekends and new year's, without over-drinking as usual. I found that, though I have been through 2 weekends AF without any problems, this weekend I had to really fight off urge to have a few drinks. Ended up with 2 glasses of wine with dinner, both Sat & Sun. I am doing supps, read book, waiting for other stuff to arrive in the mail....
My question, do people have certain days that are harder than others? I am just worried that afer a few weeks, your resolve starts to weaken and you slip back into your old habits. Any advice?

[TiredofHiding]

Day 18 19

Hi JackieO -

Way to go on 20 days! You voiced one of my fears - of getting complacent eventually and thinking I'm ok, when I've proven before I'm not. Moderation is my eventual goal, but for now I'm going totally AF for a while.
You asked about days - yes, I think certain ones are harder. I thought Friday would be hard becuase of the ol' end of the week relax, celebrate, unwind thing, but we wound up busy and I was feeling so good it was ok.
I am actually having a bit of a struggle today - Monday. Unlike some people on here, weekdays have been more my days to drink - my husband doesnt' get home until about 2 hours after I do so there is this limbo area between the end of my work day, mommy time and then family time. I typically started about 3:30 or 4:00 to get some in before he got home. Today I have been feeling it more and hoping I can get through those hours. This is the first real struggle I've faced so I'm praying and drinking lots of water and going to go to the bookstore with my daughter later to keep us busy.

that was a long answer, but I think it depends on your personal rituals. We have to figure out what those were and fight them. I am waiting for the hypnosis CDs and I hope to put some suggestions in there for myself to combat the antsyness and boredom until my husband gets home - that is my biggest challenge time.

[jane jane]

Day 18 19

JackieO (now, I am seeing you with a little pillbox hat and an A-line dress just like the real Jackie, although I guess that was before she was "O"...) I'm a bit behind you, on Day 13, but I know what you mean. On ordinary days I've been surprisingly un-tempted, and really do forget that wine exists for loooong stretches. I've even stopped dreaming about it! But yes, the "trigger days" do crop up, and they present problems. Today is Monday, and every Monday night my French club meets---7 of us who speak French and drink wine. I made it through last week's meeting victoriously, and I'm feeling determined about tonight, but it's on my mind! We have a New Orleans weekend coming up (business trip for husband) and of course that will be 2.5 "difficult" days. All I can advise (I'm no expert!) is that you just accept that some days will be harder than others, and clench your teeth!

[JackieO]

Day 18 19

Thanks Ladies, for your response. I felt about 50 pounds lighter in my heart after reading your posts. I am a very private person--as a matter of fact, there is no one in my entire life that understands what a difficult situation this drinking thing is for me, and that I'm trying so hard to come to grips with it. So it is nice to be able to find a place to express myself to someone else.
Have either of you done the hypno scripts or are you taking any meds? I am waiting for meds to come, but have not ordered the hypno yet because I'm not sure where I will find the privacy to do them. I have 2 daughters and a husband, and I feel like there is always someone asking me "watcha doin?".
It sounds like triggers are the same--after a stressful day at work, what better reward, and what better way to counter boredom while waiting for the evening family onslaught, than to have a drinkie-poo (or more!). And for the French gathering, what a challenge to not have a glass of wine (or more!) with your friends as you practice your French.
I guess the focus is best placed on how wonderful it feels not to wake up feeling sick, and being ashamed because another night was lost to the drinks. Good luck, ladies!

[TiredofHiding]

Day 18 19

Hi Jackie -

I'm taking Campral (day 4 on that) and it seems to be helping already. I am waiting for the cds. I just got the mail and they're not here today darn it. Maybe tomorrow. I have been trying to think about a time to do it - most likely in the evening after my daughter goes to bed. I'm just afraid I'll fall asleep during them. I'm going to have to set boundaries - if the bedroom door is shut - leave me alone!

Jane - teeth clenching is a good way to put it. And I can really feel for you on the French thing. We're planning a trip to France either this summer or possibly putting it off until next year and I want to be in a good frame of mind to enjoy wonderful wines but not over do it. My French always gets better when I drink though (at least in my head it does!)

[jane jane]

Day 18 19

Good words, Jackie. You're going to be a star at this AF business, I can tell. And Tired---you may have been kidding about "better French when looped" but there's some validity to that! At a certain level of proficiency, what "holds us back" from letting go and speaking it is our inhibitions about making mistakes. When those inhibitions are removed by that third (ou quatrieme, ou cinquieme!) glass of wine, we just let 'er rip and our knowledge takes over. I swear, last week at our meeting I was hesitating over BABY words and simple sentences, because I was "too aware" of myself! After a few (in the past) I'd be rattling like a Parisian (and have been told by actual French people I was really making sense.) (But hmmmm...maybe they were drunk too!)

[jane jane]

Day 18 19

Oh, ToH, meant to ask---ou' en France allez-vous? Sera-t-elle ta premiere voyage la'?

[jane jane]

Day 18 19

Eh!!! See? I'm sober for 13 days and I get the gender of "voyage" wrong! Should be "sera-t-il ton premier voyage..."!!!