FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

[greeneyes]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

socal, I swear... I was a teacher at one point. That is hilarious.

[lukalee]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

God, I don't even know which one to choose from. The most recent one was where I was drinking all day, and I ended up at a comedy club that night. I really did not feel like I was that drunk, but when I went to the bathroom, when I was trying to pull up my pants over my big ol' bootie, I fell flat on my face with my pants doen. Thank God no one was in there.

[Suki411]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

ok, I have two, one is AF related the other isn't.

Moved in here 4 years ago, rainy weekend, moved two blocks away, but everyone refused to help me move because of the weather.

Was soaking wet, makeup and mascara running down my face. Got into the new place, and put on the only nightclothes I could find.......a teal green fleece night gown, with a 3-D fuzzy cat on my chest that would meouw, if you touched it. (Love my aunt and cousins who continue to give me stupid cat presents.) Opened a battle of wine. Had several before I decided to sear some nantucket scallops. Was TOTALLY unaware that the alarm system was hooked up to the fire department. Living in such a small space, it didn't take much to set off the smoke alarm. The door bell rang, I brought my next glass of wine to the front door only to find many handsome fireman, staring at the cat on my chest.

They came in to check on things. Offered them scallops or wine. They said no. Hmm. Wonder why.

Did bring them cookies and brownies a week later.

But what was probably worse, was one day, several years ago, when walking to work from Back Bay in Boston to downtown. Days of skirts and pantyhose. Went to the john, then tucked my blouse into my pantyhose for "a better line". Unfortunately, I also tucked my skirt into my pantyhose, so as I walked down Commonwealth Ave., with my entire posterior exposed. Do you think anyone said anything? It was a 30 minute walk.


No more panty hose, no more skirts!

[Finding My Self]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

Mine are all 'not funny'!! (Aaagh!) But a sort of one I love is this - and quite true! I was there even though I was a scaredy teeny non-drinker then!!!

On a holiday once, one lad decided to hold one of his 'famous' parties with about 50 friends in his parent's house - they, of course, weren't there but were due for the weekend the following day. The lad got flat out drunk - never took much for him if I remember that far back! - and went to bed. One of the 'guests' was in the Merchant Navy...in the days when they dished out condoms by the 200-a-box load..... (do they still!?!?!) He had brought a box along....for a laugh. Lad asleep there followed a merry drunken plan.....absolutely everything that could 'take' a condom got one put on it.....a whole box...200 condoms on saucepan handles, taps, pens, door handles....rulers, golf clubs, hooks and cutlery.....

Of course the lad wakes up in the morning...hung over..goes for the kettle and cutlery drawer...with a horrible realisation dawning on him!........and rings all his mates (sic!) to doubt their parentage and ask how many of the &%^$?&* things there were in the house...... "Dunno, can't remember....." say his mates.... And his parents were turning up in a couple of hours time...... Can you imagine the panic he was in and how well he got to know every nook and cranny of that house in those two hours!?!?! This was 1972 when 'grown ups' didn't take kindly to 200 condoms all over their house!!!

Moral of this story - never get too pissed to not know what antics your 'friends' are getting up to!! Worked for me for the next 25 years.....pity I then forgot it!! (But no condoms TG!)

:H xxx

[Deena]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

I agree these are more reasons not to drink, but I am getting a chuckle out of the stories. I have some I'd rather not remember/tell as I'm sure others do, but here are some of the lighter ones:

#1) I don't smoke any more, but those of you who do/did, can probably agree that lighting a cigarette under the influence, can be a challenge. How many of you have lit one by the wrong end in front of others? Nasty smell adds to the embarassment.

#2) Back in the 1980's, I followed the fashion trend and had what we called BIG HAIR. Multitudes of flammable hairspray were required for this look to stay put all night in the clubs. I caught my bangs on fire lighting a cigarette...twice. Not on the same night though.

#3) I was over-drinking wine while hubby was gone. I had a fingernail that had broken. I decided to repair it with SuperGlue. AL told me that the way to unclog a clogged SuperGlue tube was to cut it with scissors and then squeeze it really hard until it comes out....while looking straight at it. I SuperGlued my eye shut!!!

Fortunately, I wasn't so drunk that I actually put the nail polish remover on my eye to attempt to get it open. I did actually think about it though, which is kind of scary. My fogged brain remembered the only way to remove SuperGlue was with nail polish remover, but also remembered nail polish remover didn't belong in the eye.

[lukalee]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

OMG!!! What did you do about the Super Glue in the eye?

[Deena]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

I put baby oil on it, finished the wine and passed out, of course.

Next day it was "pickable":H

[lukalee]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

Holy shit, that's awesome. I would have freaked out and used a knife or something stupid. Thank goodness you showed some patience.

[dexterhead]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

Mine are all actually kind of depressing. Here's one: about 10 years ago, went out with some colleagues for happy hour for some sort of "bottomless margarita" thing. I CAN"T handle margaritas. I don't remember, but apparently I puked, in a very subtle, high-falutin' way, on the floor of a restaurant in Chicago, in the Loop. Then my friends got me to Union Station and onto a train home. I have an idea that I may very well have puked on the train. Still do not know. This was not the gritty CTA (city trains) but the snobby Metra serving the suburbs. Somehow made it home (a six-block walk) and found the hidden key and got home. ughh. there's more.. many involving inappropriate men

[sweetpea]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

:H OMG I am sitting here with tears running down my face and splitting my sides with laughing. What delicious tales they are all so funny. Won't be around for a couple of days but will catch up with you after the weekend. I shall have cup of coffee in hand ready to read some more wonderful stories - Are we sure big AL is not a comic in disguise trying to get new material for his show :H

Another sweetpea tale to keep the ball rolling

A different version of going to sleep in the toilet - I happened to be in a pub at the time!!
Came to with someone knocking on the door to see if I was alright - Blamed it on a dodgy stomach Hmmmmmmmmmm don't think they bought it though!!!! Felt a bit hot under the collar when I walked out

LOL Sweetpea

[slightlysuze]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

Oh thanks for this thread! *wipes tear from eye* I am weeing myself with laughing!:H

Deena...you totally cracked me up....thanks!

I once arrived a bit late for a music gig and there was only about 15 mins left for drinking in the bar before it started.....I drank as much as I could and by the interval I was away with the fairies....back to the bar for a top up and felt I needed to sit down. Unfortunately all the seats were taken so I hit on a great idea.....they had baby high chairs stacked up in the corner (the place had a nursery group in the day) so I dragged one out and tried to get into it...ended up with one leg in one of the dainty leg holes, the rest of the chair hanging off me as I staggered around saying 'I just need to lose a few pounds and it'll fit fine!'.....difficult to look cool like that.


Oh the shame! :bonkers:


Suze x

[satori]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

Finding,

Your story reminded me of an "interesting" party I attended when I was about 18.

The girl who was having the party had got rid of her parents for the weekend - so things got out of hand rapidly.

One guy who was a bit obnoxious to the ladies, got totally drunk and fell soundly asleep.
So soundly in fact that the "ladies" hatched a cunning plan.

One girl donated her bra, another her tights (pantyhose - for the USA!) and they stripped the guy, painted his face (and various other parts of his anatomy ) with makeup and dressed him in the donated underwear.

They then enlisted the help of some of the guys there (I'm saying nothing!) to carry him bodily to the house of a neighbour (who was well known for her straightlacedness).
The poor chap was left on the front doorstep and the doorbell was rung!

The perpetrators then retired to a safe distance to await results.

The results were fairly spectacular!
Luckily living in a small village, the local police officers knew most of us and were cool.
They actually managed (but only just!) to keep a straight face as they were telling us off!

As for the guy involved - he used to brag about it afterwards

The lady who was chief "anatomy" painter is now an eminent surgeon, and the lady who held the party is a lawyer!

Love

Satori

xxx

[Finding My Self]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

Oh Satori - that is FAB!!!! Hey, and our kids think we're boring!?!?!

The super-glued eyes?!?!? EEEK!

Sad that I spent so many years being all tightlaced sober and stiff-upper-lipped so no funny stories by me....until the stories became just not funny!! What happened!! Now they're funny cos I'm sober!! :H

This is a great thread! Thanks!

Finding My Self

[KAT20]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

Did ya ever notice your face feels numb after a long night of partying. (and zits look bigger) Got home from drinking one night and decided that zit on my nose was ready to pop. So I squeezed and poked and passed out. Next morning and for about a week after I looked like Rudolph. Not enough conceler in the world would hide that sucker.

[happydog]

FUN TIME FOLKS - What is the funniest stupidest thing you have ever done

ok a few years ago my hubby got a new mobile phone, i had to much to drink, pick the up phone and said this phone has got magnet at the back..... thinking that phone can stick on to the fridge. the phone drop on the floor, hubby was not to please, but my son could not stop laughing.

I have spray deodorant in my hair.... thinking that it was hair spray after a hangover.
Next day after a hangover put another tampon in not realizing there was one in already.
When i was pregnant i thought i would waxs my bikini legs.:H could not see a think (shit) my husband had to finish it of for me. (very painful):upset:

This is without a drink... set the kitchen on fire... first one was inside the oven.....the second one was the worst on top of the oven forgot to turn the light of put a plastic tray on top, was burning for about ten minutes before i realized.... i think i have had the firemen out to my house about three times. Oh yes once left the gas fire on, but no fire just gas gone to bed.... but my hubby had to go down stairs to let the dog out in the garden.... well the dog was fast asleep from the gas.... Thank god my hubby never lit a cigarette.

Last one left the keys in the car with the engine running and lock the car door.

I dont know why but things just go wrong around me. (I'm always jinx's) lol

Love

Teardrop.x