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    reality check

    Got it last night from hubby. He can go on and it was about a 2 hour discussion. Much needed. He said we had to have a disciplined plan and stick to it. Get up early AM, walk the doggie (in those underwear... no he didn't mention the gnawed out butthole underwear, I just can't help myself ). I explained my supplement program to him that I am supposed to follow. I am to put it in writing for him and he will remind me. We will go to work together because I can't be left alone or I will drink. He will patrol my office for bottles with the keys to my filing cabinet that I hide from him. I will hide the cash from customers from him in return since he wandered down the drug trail. Then we will go to the gym and do something even if it is just sweat out toxins in the sauna. We used to play raquetball and I'd kick his ass, before AL kicked mine. And we have to go to meetings. ugh. I agreed to go to his narc anon meetings with him, but I'm not sure about the AA thing. And we get back to eating real food at a normal hour. I used to make a healthy lunch and bring it to work for us. And make dinners, and handle all our mail and finances, and I just got overloaded and quit. I quit everything. Piles of stuff are on my desk(s). I digress. Anyway, he said we are going down in flames and stand a good chance at this pace to loose our business. And if this plan does not work we are going to rehab. I don't want to go to rehab. Ya'll know how I am about my med records. I suggested if it got to that point we just go fly fishing in the woods for two weeks where we can't get anything and it's cheaper than rehab. I do so well doing that. I ride my bike, walk, happily fish away, don't focus on the drink. But it doesn't bring in income. I have to learn to feel that way in my home enviornment again. This is starting to sound like a my story thing isn't it? So anyway, that's the plan. 6:00 up, doggie, supplements, work, healthy lunches and dinners, drink healthy beverages (hee), gym, meetings,listen to the CDs, eat kudzu. Need many hours in the day for all that. Today is the first day. I wish he was home. Guess I'll walk doggie by myself, in my big girl pants. Thanks for listening. I don't want rehab, I just want my life back.
    sigpic
    Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT

    #2
    reality check

    Good Luck Greeneyes,

    I'll be thinking of you!!!!!


    My heart
    Patience has its limits. Take it too far, and it's cowardice.
    - George Jackson

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      #3
      reality check

      Sounds like a good plan Greeneyes!
      Marcie

      Comment


        #4
        reality check

        Greeneyes: Great! You and your husband have a plan in place. Both of your recoveries is a team effort. Both of you are there to support each other. Here's an idea I have.... Perhaps you can share this plan with a trusted friend or therapist. It might be nice to have a coach. Someone who is unbiased. Someone else who you and your husband must answer to. One of the ways in which I have remained sober these past 8 months is, not only did I share my plan with my husband, I account for myself with my therapist. I also came clean with my father. He doesn't ask me "how I'm doing all the time", but on occassion I get hit with the question. Having to account for my drinking actions to people other than my husband has helped keep me on track. Good luck with your plan. Reach out to me (us) when you need support. -Reenie
        September 23, 2011

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          #5
          reality check

          greeneyes,
          fantastic plan. Well, we sometimes have to plan things in life similar as to how we would plan for a military operation. Perhaps, at first glance, your plan may seem a little extreme and very disciplined, but we have to remember that Al is one relentless bastard, so if it takes this "timetable" and lifestyle overhaul for you and hubby to succeed, then I say.........GO FOR IT and GIVE IT ALL YOU`VE GOT. You have devised a plan to make failure seem not an option, so if both of you stick to your guns........you will not fail.

          Love and strength to you both.

          Starlight Impress x

          Comment


            #6
            reality check

            That sounds wonderful, Greeneyes! It feels like a lot in the beginning, but really it is just life. Sleeping, eating, exercising, taking vitamins, walking the dog. these things are just the things "normal" peole do on a daily basis. But, I know how you feel - in the beginning getting into a routine is tough, so be gentle on yourself. Make it as simple as possible, don't do too much, just what you need to. Then you can add in more as you feel better.

            You have a wonderful situation in that you have a support person doing it with you. That is really important. Lean on each other. Call him when you are feeling anxious, remind him to do the same. Come here.. I love talking to you!

            I am very proud of you and your husband. I wish you both the best of luck...

            Namaste,

            MM
            Face your deficiencies and acknowledge them, but do not let them master you. Let them teach you patience, sweetness, insight.

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              #7
              reality check

              You have a great plan, Greeneyes...and it's so important to have your husband into it as well...

              Day 1! Just do it. You are not going to drink today. Look forward to going to bed sober and waking up with no hangover...

              Have a good day 1!

              Don

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                #8
                reality check

                great work green...I plan every day as it makes life easier.....
                Day 1 of the rest of your life...exellent
                Love Jacqui xxx
                Mwo,s worst speller....

                Comment


                  #9
                  reality check

                  Good Luck Green eyes

                  if you have a trusted friend or counsellor i agree tell them too as sometimes hubbies and wifes can tug at each other in a negative way to restore "old Patterns".

                  also when you are both struggling the internal battle may be different for bot h of you and so so easy to "bend the agreed rules"

                  Grab support from "somebody who can be objective and make you feela ccountable".

                  Good luck and the changes will happen gradually..sounds like you know the lifestyle you prefer to be engaging in .

                  Cassy

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                    #10
                    reality check

                    it sounds like a good plan
                    my hubby would fly fish every single minute of his life if he could
                    keep on with the supplements
                    keep coming here.
                    :l
                    rudemama

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                      #11
                      reality check

                      Green, I'm happy for you. Having a plan is so important to the battle. So many people want to stop an addiction and they always say they don't know how. Well, that's were writing out a plan makes the difference in success and failure. You are on your way to success. Stick to it and stay strong!

                      Good luck to both you and hubby. I'll be praying for you.

                      Love, Me
                      :l
                      Alcohol is simply the device between success and failure.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        reality check

                        Sounds like a good plan greeneyes - don't forget to reward yourselves for your change in behavior. We beat ourselves up so easily when we make mistakes, yet we never reward ourselves when we are doing well. Set a goal of a week of your new behaviors, and then when you accomplish it, go to the movies, or buy something for the house you both want. Then set another goal/reward.
                        Be of good cheer. Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourselves a difficult task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find joy in overcoming obstacles (Helen Keller)

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                          #13
                          reality check

                          hi there greeneyes..good luck . it does sound like a good plan so give it your best.but hey i like the woods idear
                          :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
                          best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

                          Comment


                            #14
                            reality check

                            Greenie~

                            This is the most hopeful post!!!

                            Heartfelt warm wishes to you and your hubby..... :l
                            and listen to Cassy.... when my husband and I quit smoking "together", the promise was to call each other when the urge was overwhelming.... well, that's what we did, but all we managed to do was to convince each other that "one wouldn't hurt"....

                            Grundy Undies to you! Are they your lucky ones? :nutso:

                            Happy Sunday! :l

                            Patty
                            Tampa, FL

                            Comment


                              #15
                              reality check

                              Good luck Greeneyes...you can do this.
                              It's personal, myself and I, we've got some straightening out to do. And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket but I've got to get a move on with my life.
                              It's time to be a big girl now....

                              Comment

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