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    #1

    Killing myself

    I know I am literally killing myself. I have the CD's, the supps., the Kudzu, but can't seem to get it all together. I am going to order the topomax, although I am concerned about the side affects, but they can't be worse than death.

    I can't go to rehab again, as my husband has ALZ and I have no one to take care of him while I am gone. He is not bad enought to put into a care facility for 30 days, but bad enough to be unable to stay alone. My children took care of him during my original rehab, but can't asked them to do that again. They are not his children.

    Help me please. I wished I believed in GOD - I would pray to him for help.
    Tags: None
    #2
    Killing myself

    I'm here with you Punkin. You don't have to believe in God to pray.
    Goal 1: Today
    Goal 2: Tomorrow

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      #3
      Killing myself

      Punkin, I hope the topa helps you. You have an awful lot on your plate. Don't know what else to say but I will pray for you.:h

      Comment

        #4
        Killing myself

        wow punkin. you are making the first very difficult steps to heal yourself. it is very overwheliming when you first decide that you need to stop or cut down. Are you having withdrawals? at least ones that might need special medical attention?

        Please just start with the supplements, it does take sometime to see the positive effects, specially if you have been drinking heavily for a long time. i

        stay with us. I understand the part about not believing in God.
        I wish you strength . and do get back to us we are here to support you.

        Trix
        You can't turn a pickle into a cucumber

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          #5
          Killing myself

          wow

          Punkin, we are with you, you can borrow my God to help take care of you..........HE will ( he is cool!), I am sure..........:lilangel: :rays: :wings:

          Love you,:h
          MA
          :rays:My happiness is my greatest gift to others:rays:eace:

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            #6
            Killing myself

            ((((Punkin))))

            If you ever want to talk to someone with a good ear. E-mail me or get on chat and we can private chat. I'm a good listener and sometimes just having someone listen can help.:l

            Comment

              #7
              Killing myself

              Punkin, my heart goes out to you. If you feel you really need rehab again, won't your children understand? You can not be of any help to anybody unless you take care of yourself first. Forgive me please for what I'm about to say, but if your continued drinking took you away from this Earth, who would take care of your husband then? Most likely your children? I say discuss it with them. My mom is no longer with us, but if I found out she needed me, but was afraid to ask, I would be so hurt. Let them help if they are willing. That's what family is for. Now is no time for guilt, hun.

              And if you don't mind, I would like to pray for you and your husband.

              Please take care of yourself. And don't be afraid to ask for help.

              Love, Me
              :l
              Alcohol is simply the device between success and failure.

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                #8
                Killing myself

                Punkin, I believe in god, so I will pray to him for you.
                Take care of yourself.
                Love Paula.
                .

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                  #9
                  Killing myself

                  Punkin - please try to get someone to talk to outside of rehab if you can't go that route again, you have way too much on your shoulders right now. I think there is a Needs Help ASAP forum here - can you post there to see if there are more suggestions for you? If AA is too religious centric for you maybe you can get strength from a Woman For Sobriety chapter near you? This forum is awesome, but you sound like you need something on top of this to help you through. Also, I agree with Thankful -- ask your children. The worst they can say is no, and even if they do, at least they know you need them.

                  Very worried about you -- please hang in there and keep us posted.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Killing myself

                    All good advice here Punkin. Just want you to know I am thinking of you and your husband and wishing you the best.
                    I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Killing myself

                      Punkin I hope you can find the help that you need and starting with what you already have at hand sounds like a good start. I wish for you peace.
                      "Keep your eyes and heart focused on the end goal at all times, and never settle for less."

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                        #12
                        Killing myself

                        Punkin, thinking of you and your hubby.

                        Could you call the rehab facility and ask them if they have an out-patient group or if they can connect you will a counsellor?

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                          #13
                          Killing myself

                          THANK YOU all for the wonderful support. I am sitting here crying that so many people can actually care about me and not even know me. Those of you who said you would pray to your God, thank you. Maybe he or she will reach out to me and touch me.

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                            #14
                            Killing myself

                            sending a prayer out for you RIGHT now - i too believe in God and and He loves you dear

                            hugs,

                            Pbear
                            when you fail at something is when you learn and grow the most

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                              #15
                              Killing myself

                              good luck punkin you make my problems seem so petty

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