My excuses

[steer64]

Okay, I am new and I'm going to give excuses why I'm an alcoholic.

It started out in the 10th grade, when I was afraid to dance because I thought I looked stupid. When I drank, I didn't think soooooo. I went to my first kegger and boy, kids who were so "normal" in high school shed a different light when they drank. So weekly keggers were in, socialization was at a new level. Graduation parties all surrounded around kegs. It was bad, and it's been downhill for the last 30 years.

Then, dropping the drinking age to 18 my first year in college. I am lucky that I graduated!

It's a scary thought of how many kids are in the same shape I'm in.

I've gone to AA and didn't like that at all. Besides that I don't smoke and I never felt apart from anyone.

I have gone AF for thirty-sixty days and then really feel good and right back at it again.

I have a loving family, my wife is the most important part of my life. She doesn't drink and she is on her 8th month of not smoking.

I've never been given a ticket for driving under the influence and when I read the first page of the website, it's the first time I have found a site that I hope can help me. I can't go to anyone local, it's a small town and I work in a profession that if this got out would devastate my work.

I haven't drank today. I'm embarrassed. My wife gave me the lecture of my life. And today is the first day.

[Guest]

My excuses

First off welcome......I just went to my first AA meeting today. I am hopeful it will help in my endeavor, but it isn't for everyone. They almost killed me with the cigs too!!! BUT, we have smoke-free meetings where I am so my next one will be SMOKE-FREE.
MWO is a great program, I had 7 months AF on the program. I just got cocky and thought I had beat the beast and started testing the waters and slowly....before long I had a 4 day binge. UH!!!! Get the supps and the book. Don't try to do this alone, it is to hard. Read post, there is excellent support here.

[Noelle]

My excuses

Hi Steer64! I don't like AA either. But did you only go to one meeting? Or was that the only one in your town? If you can, try to go to another meeting. A lot of people really take to AA.

Good luck starting your journey AF. Post a lot and read a lot. Try the supplements and the CDs. They really help! And of course this site is fantastic!!

BTW, your wife "lectures" you because she loves you.

[ducky]

My excuses

Welcome Steer64,

We all have our excuses/reasons. The important thing is that you'd like to change things and you found a wonderful site and wonderful people to help you.

If you haven't downloaded the book you can do it online and it's not expensive. That would be a good first step.

Keep reading and posting. We look forward to getting to know you!

PS - Many of have gotten "the lecture...." What we do is hard on those we love for sure.

[ducky]

My excuses

Also, there is a section on the site for family members to post if that would be helpful for your wife...

[Sunbeam]

My excuses

I have a wonderful husband who was stymied about my drinking. Coming here has enabled me to be AF over 30 days. I got started by writing down all the reasons why I hate drinking to excess, and asked, in writing, for his support no matter what. He is thrilled with my success so far, and optimistic about our future together. A month ago I also purchased three books : My Way Out, Allan Carr's Easy Way to Stop Drinking, and an AA book. Check out the reviews at Amazon to make your own choice.

[dexterhead]

My excuses

Steer: Hi and welcome!! Your teen/young adult experiences sound much like mine. 18 was the drinking age and high school was all about bingeing, drinking till you puked. Perhaps we went to high school together I went to college in a state with a 19 drinking age, but I of course procured a fake ID. Post-college, I was fairly moderate for years, but then when some bad things happened in my life, I started drinking like a fish.
I think you will like this site, and I am happy you have a supportive wife. Many people here have partners who drink and I think that would make it extra hard.

[4theboyz]

My excuses

Steer 64, I wish you well in your journey. You say that your wife gave you quite a lecture and that can be quite a wake up call. It's great to have a motivation such as your wife caring enough about you to let you know how important it may be for you to reconsider AL's role in your life as I did for my wife and boys.

Drinking can have an enormously strong sentimental connection such as your description of the good old days which are hard to let go of. I am having to do just that myself. Ultimately it is up to each of us individually to win the battle with AL, to make the right choices, to do the right things that will better our lives.
:welcome:

[skygal12]

My excuses

Hi Steer! Welcome. You found a great place - I am a newbie too. 3 weeks AF! Lucky that your spouse is not a drinker, that makes it soooo much better. My significant other is a big drinker and, well, lets just say that it is not working out....

Keep coming back! Download the book - lots of good info in there. The supplements help a bunch with the cravings, nerves, etc. The calmes forte was my favorite - kept the anxiety at bay and helped me sleep during those first few weeks ....(I slipped quite a few times!)

[steer64]

My excuses

Thanks but I have a question

Thanks for welcoming me.....in the past, I have gone as much as 60 days AF and I didn't drink in Jan this year....the whole month....I crave alcohol when I want to kick up my heals and I go to the casino's. I haven't shaken or had what I would consider a DT......it's just that I go and I think I "have been good" and then one is too many and 10 aren't enough.

Anyway, will the supplements do me any good if I don't think I have a physical problem? I just like to drink????

I am planning on not drinking again. I don't know if I have the will power. I'm concerned because my liver has gone through 35-40 years of a good time.......

Anyway, we went to the casino tonight, had supper and I didn't crave nor think about a drink...but I've done that before......so.....I have be AF for day one.

[skygal12]

My excuses

Steer - I didn't have a physical problem either. I was a binger - would go days without a drink and then whammo! 3 bottles of wine and 2 days of binging! It got worse too where I was drinking every other night and it was affecting my work, my life and my mental being. I had to quit. I need to be AF - scratch that. I WANT to be AF - forever. The supplements give your body back the vitamins and nutrients that the AL has taken away, helps with the cravings. The topamax (which I take) helps with the biochemical, psychological cravings....it's up to you what your goals are as far as going totally sober or moderating. We are here to support you in what you want to do. The book gives lots of information on supplements, meds and a new way of thinking about "alcoholism".

Peace,
Deb

[Hannah]

My excuses

HiYa Steer - I was not a drinker who was "physically" addicted either, ie.., never suffered any real "withdrawal" symptoms - but the physiological part of my drinking was a bigee. It made me feel good, it gave me self confidence, made me feel sexy - need I go On? It also was sapping my energy, health, drive, physical health, and confidence - in short - WTF was it doing for me anymore? Once you have reached that "aha" moment, I think you are really ready to make some changes ....

Good luck to you. We here all know, and have expreienced, what you are going through, feeling, and dealing with. Holler for help when you need to, or whisper quietly for advice - your choice - we are here to help. Good luck!

[bushdrop]

My excuses

This is my first post (technically my first day!)

Here's my story... I too partied a lot in college, and somewhere along the line I drank at home, and dipped tobacco to slow down the beers. I'm most worried about the tobacco, and know that I never want it unless I'm drinking beer by myself before bed. Never really knew there was anything wrong with the drinking (my father always preached no more than a beer an hour and my mom just warned me not to drink and drive.) I've become alcohol dependent, though. I had to drink before I went to work or my hands wouldn't be coordinated enough to do my job well, so I took some time off for that. Whenever I stop cold turkey I am a total insomniac (even with prescription sleep aids), and I get gout attacks. I haven't had a drink since Saturday, and now I can barely walk. It's almost backwards for me. My parents split a bottle of wine before bed every night (but no tobacco,) and funtion well, so they really can't to relate to my demons.
Anyhow, I just started the program today with all the supplements and the first cd. No exercise yet until I stop limping, and no prescriptions yet, but I have no cravings. I know most of my triggers (easily intolerant of certain behavior, and getting stuck going at home tonight to watch my favorite tv shows or a dvd) and I've learned to avoid other situations that make me want to have more than a couple of beers, but I wish everyone luck, and hope you wish me some too!:new:

[steer64]

My excuses

Good luck bushdrop

Stories are so similar......Bushdrop, today is our second day!!!!

The psychological thing is an issue.

I'm going to order the cd and the book today. I know that I can go for at least 30-60 days, but I want to quite forever.

I still have my AA book and it looks good, but I never really bought into that group....maybe it was just the location, very large city, but regardless the town I live in now is too small. This will work just fine with me.

Thanks and good luck. I'll check back in tonight and see how everyone is doing.

[4theboyz]

My excuses

Hello Bushdrop,

There are many here who would also be envious of your parents ability to split a bottle of wine every night and not have a problem for it. The is no magic answer why some of us do have a problem with AL, but one thing does seem consistent is there are usually other issues at play that cause AL to play a major role in dealing with those issues.

You mentioned how your parents wouldn't "relate to your demons", and IMO more than one demon is one too many when AL is around. I found writing down *all* the times I drank helped me identify my demons and triggers which helped me make the adjustments in my life to help me stay sober. There is a lot of info here and people who are ready to help you with your journey. Good luck!