Confession

[LVT25]

I guess I just proved to myself that I just can't go out in a social situation and drink moderately. I"m doing so much better at home, but when I go out I drink like a fish and then I have a couple of smokes. Then I wake up feeling like shit! Why? Am I going to just have to stay home the rest of my life?? I didn't even know I drank that much at this wedding reception last night, but I haven't felt this bad in a LONG time!
I didn't want to post this, but I guess it's time I got honest with myself, and maybe this will help.

[KateH1]

Confession

Hi and welcome, Vetech, Sorry you are feeling bad today, that really sucks! You know, for years after a night of drinking, I would ask myself, How many times does this have to happen, how many times will it take before I wake up and realize that I do not drink well. I truly hate what happens when I drink?

Yet, I continually held on to the belief that next time would be different. It rarely was, and I knew that I could never honestly predict what would happen after drink #1.

Becoming a non-drinker was the best decision I have ever made! No more fear or regrets when I go out. No more waking up in the morning feeling awful and wondering what I said or did! What a relief!

Whatever your goal is with AL, I hope that you can find your way. If you stick around here, I think it will help!

Again Welcome!
KateH

[Ask For Help]

Confession

ah, another learning opportunity

Hey Mimi:

Been there and so done that. In fact most of us are still trying to figure out "what went wrong." Here's how I might try to process the situation if it were me . . .

So you're doing better at home . . . you've got some strategies that work there that don't translate so well when out . . . so let's think about that. . .

You're at a wedding . . .You're excited, dressed up, maybe a little nervous, seeing people you might not have seen for a while, maybe being with a lot of people you've never met before. Are any of those triggers for drinking . . . like 'I'd sure handle any one of those situations better with a few drinks in me".

Add in: maybe someone else is anding you drinks or filling your glass? OR are you so busy talking to folks that you're not paying attention to how many drinks you've had? OR, OR, OR

So if any of the above seem like a trigger or a possible cause of overdoing it, what might you do differently next time. (Big hint: Staying home is not an answer:-)

Hope this isn't too prescriptive. I'm talking to myself too.
It's all a process . . . progress not perfection. Hope you're feeling better soon!

Fondly

AFH

[ZenMetal]

Confession

Hi Vettech25,

When you are in a social situation, might it be possible to put yourself in a position where you *can't* drink - like being a designated driver? I found that really helped me when I was newly sober. I hated staying home, but going out was too much of a temptation - so that kind of middle line really helped me. I was in a position where I couldn't drink - and if I did, after making the people I was with aware that I was the designated driver for the night - I would have looked pretty bad in public. That excuse still comes in handy for me if I'm not looking forward to a social event (they're always loaded with trigger moments).

Hang in there.

Peace & strength

ZM

[tlrgs]

Confession

everything in life takes time

[tea]

Confession

Hi Vett,

Being the designated driver works for me too, or saying that I'm on antibiotics but really being the driver is the safest bet as no-one will cajol you into taking 'just one' if you are driving them home, we all know, well in my case anyway, there is no such thing as 'just one' drink so it has to be none at all. I dreaded going anywhere drink related at first (still do sometimes) but depending on who you are with it really opens your eyes to see what you were like, although I always think I never behaved like that - LOL - not half eh and what a feeling the morning after, absolutely priceless to know exactly what you said and did, great stuff. As trlgs said, it takes time and a lot of practice for something to become normal, as in going out and not drinking to become normal and people do get used to you not being a drinker - honest they do, eventually. Looking forward to hearing how you are getting on.

LX

[Sunbeam]

Confession

I'm trying to avoid continuation of the same mistakes. My alcohol abuse was mostly at home alone, so I WILL NOT drink at home alone. I have never abused alcohol while out to dinner with my husband, so I may have a glass there in the future. My worst alcohol abuse was not in social
situations, yet I was drinking more than others. Haven't decided, but if I drink at all, I will have only one glass. Once I have two, my resolve wavers.

[betty boop]

Confession

Hi V, I have a history of falling asleep on tables, having to be carried down stairs etc ......... I was really bad ......

I have been here for 18 months now so have tried several things along the way ..........

But even for my best friends wedding last year ....... I ALWAYS DRIVE!!!! ........ It the best way to deal with this .......

All the best, BB xx

[seeker]

Confession

Hi Vettech-been there too

Just like so many of us here...I have done the very same thing and the next day have been so angry with myself :-( It does no good to beat ourselves up...just hopefully learn from it somehow and figure out what to do differently the next time we have to go out and be in a social drinking situation. Abstain,have just 1..? I don't know. I've tried myself. It is so much more of a challenge when out at a social affair like a wedding and the booze is flowing like that. Of course most people around you are consuming as well, so it's much easier to just go along with the flow. Everyone has to figure out what works best for them..We can't stay at home all the time. Has anyone tried the CD for handling social drinking situations? I am interested in buying it...


" Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. "