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**greeneyes** · March 17, 2008, 05:19 AM

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Hi, seen the light :welcome: I'm going through the same thing. Not with family as they do not live near me and they don't have this problem anyway, but with friends with whom I share a long drinking history. Lots of people here with support and good advice. Post and they will answer. Good luck to you in your quest.

**Suki411** · March 17, 2008, 05:25 AM

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Welcome. I'm just like you and Greenie. My friends drink a lot and it's difficult for me. I find that I don't see them as much as I would like and that's difficult.

But you've come to an awesome place. Keep reading and posting. Good luck!

**tea** · March 17, 2008, 05:31 AM

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Hi Seen The Light, a big welcome to you. Have you looked and read through any posts yet? Truly enlightening stuff here, and more important the freedom to ask anything you want, there will be someone, somewhere who can and will help you. You have found a great place here, welcome again. You have taken the first step, be proud, loads of advice will follow and please jump into any discussion on any thread, you will be more than welcome.

Lx

**Seen the light!** · March 17, 2008, 05:54 AM

I,m New!!

Hi - thanks for all your replies!! I'm gonna have a good look round the site now - speak soon xx

**AMELIA** · March 17, 2008, 06:24 AM

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Hi Seen the Light!
Welcome.....sounds like you are on the right track...you want to stop and/or cut down on your intake.
Yep the hangovers are a killer huh? Why oh why do we do it to ourselves?
Keep reading and posting.
xx

**hippie37** · March 17, 2008, 06:35 AM

I,m New!!

Good morning seen the light and welcome to the forum.

In the beginning I had to cut myself of from those friends/family who I saw as being detrimental to my sobriety. There was simply no other way for me as 1 drink would of had me binging again. It seems drastic but my binges would last for more than a week-end!!. By the time I was somewhat feeling normal again my next bing would start and so the vicious circle began. I thought I had so much of an image to keep as well. I was living on an estate where it was common practice to be taking the 'accepted' drugs like 'e's, coke, speed, and weed as well as drinking copious amounts of strong cider. When I decided to give up drink my friends thought I was having a mid-life crisis or something as they couldn't somehow perceive me NOT drinking. I didn't have the same problem as you are facing as far as family goes as most of my family are sensible drinkers (unlike me!!) but mates where totally different. I found out who my true friends where when I decided to give up drink and that didn't amount to many when I stopped all the partying etc. It was one of the biggest hurdles I had to overcome myself if I'm honest. But getting honest with myself first, helped me overcome these hurdles. I did take a long hard look at my life and where I was going and eventually it did lead to the break up of my relationship of nearly 6 years. Not because I was a drunk but because being sober made me realise so many things that had been masked over by alcohol. It didn't let me see the full picture and once I did see it I gained a lot of self-confidence back which helped me overcome the hurdle with my ex as well as my friends and family. You do need a lot of confidence I believe to take control over your own drinking habits and not worry about what friends and family are going to think. Like I mentioned previously I personally had to cut myself off for a while and get some sober time under my belt first. I was quite surprised, as well, how things fell into place. NOT over night of course but gradually, I did start to notice things like how my mate would not drink when I went round to watch the footie with him. I'm OK with it now and so I don't mind being around friends when they are drinking but I do limit the time I spend in certain situations where I feel the 'party' atmosphere is descending upon the event or situation. I've found I don't envy them one bit either like I used too. I always thought I was missing out something BIG!! YEAH a BIG F'N HANGOVER!!!lol

Best of luck to you with goals and as tea said keep posting. The advise and warm welcome I got when I joined was overwhelming.

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx

**charlee** · March 17, 2008, 06:46 AM

I,m New!!

Welcome....keep reading and posting.....You have come to the right place, the folks and the support is amazing....Wishing you success.

**Seen the light!** · March 17, 2008, 06:51 AM

I,m New!!

Hi again! Just want to say thanks again to all who have replied - I really identify with what you are saying Hippie as I also dabbled with drugs in the past too - I know some of my friends will tease me for not drinking ( they don't see any harm in it) but like you said I should distance myself for a while at least. I know I can't go on as I am so I'd better get on with it. Good luck to you all xxx

**lhpgirl** · March 17, 2008, 09:05 AM

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Hi seen the lite --- I'm new as well --- thought about quitting a lot --- just haven't taken that step can someone tell me about ths program? I love the thought of getting help on - line, I just want to cut-down not stop completely -- is that possible?

**Doggygirl** · March 17, 2008, 09:20 AM

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Hi Seen and lhpgirl!! Welcome to you both. I second the motion that lots of reading and posting here on the forum helps.

I also strongly recommend that you download RJ's My Way Out book and give it a read. Many people adapt the program to work for them, but I think it's helpful to understand the base line program as RJ has outlined it.

Some people find that they can achieve moderation. I personally found that I simply cannot - I'm just not wired for it. After 60 days alcohol free last summer/fall, I tried "just one" and took a hard fall off the wagon that lasted until last week. So I won't be doing that again!! But that's just me - we all have to find what works for us.

I hope you will both consider the book, and then go from there! This is a great forum for support.

DG
Day 4 AF back on the wagon and feeling good.

**LVT25** · March 17, 2008, 11:33 AM

I,m New!!

:welcome: Seenthelight and IHP:
I've been around this site for a couple of weeks now. I started out by reading the MWO book--which you both should do. It all started because I wanted to quit smoking once and for all--so I knew the beer had to go also, at least for awhile. I also knew deep down I needed to learn how to drink in moderation or just quit--I have 2 young boys.
I agree with so much of what Hippie said. I'm discreetly trying to stay away from my drinking/smoking friends, spending more time with my family and my church. I finally confided with my husband (and drinking buddy) about the program and CD's but haven't said much about this website. I had to be "selfish" and put myself first for awhile.
Anyway, the others on this site are so much better with words than I am. I just want to tell you it's working for me. I feel so much better, have so much more energy, and I just feel happier. So, keep coming back, ok?

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