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    #1

    Day 1 AF

    Hi,

    What I wonderful web site to stumble on today. I have downloaded the MWO book and read it from cover to cover. I don't know when I've read a book so fast! :new:

    I'm getting the Topamax, it's ordered already. I have most of the supplements on hand as I've tried the nutritional part before. I'll order the rest that I don't have after this post and after I read a few more posts. Then I'll also order the CD's.

    I wrote my son, 16, an apology note today and gave it to him after he returned from school. I fought with him (again) last night and had to ask my husband what happened. This note is different from others I've written, aplogizing once again. I told my son I was going to get healthy and would start by limiting my wine intake. You see, I drink white wine. Chardonnay. A lot of it. Now it's every night until I black out. How I've wasted the past 30+ years (for the most part) is unbelieveable to me right now. It's so sad. :upset:

    So many of these posts I can relate to. I share in so many thoughts, fears, insecuries and hope with so many of you. I had no idea. :l

    I only hope I can help others on this forum at some point. No drinking today. Not even a desire. Because of this web site and the MWO book I now have a strong hope which I have never had before. Thank you all so very, very much. :thanks:

    We can do this. I have a strong, positive feeling about this. Take care. :h
    "Action is...the enemy of thought." :l Joseph Conrad
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    #2
    Day 1 AF

    :welcome: becomingmeatlast!
    You have come to the right place.
    Read, read, read. I am on day 8 AF after being a regular drinker for the past 25 years. If I can do it, anyone can.
    Stay stong, we are bonded together in our choice not to give in to the beast.

    ~Laura
    ~Laura

    Insanity    : doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results................... Albert Einstein

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      #3
      Day 1 AF

      What a hopeful first post, Becoming Me....

      We share in your thoughts, fears, insecurities.... and yes, hope. It's amazing how many of us "closet alcoholics" are here....

      Congratulations on your new start... your son may be skeptical at first, but it's only a matter of time :l...

      Welcome:heart:.

      Patty
      Tampa, FL

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        #4
        Day 1 AF

        A heartfelt Welcome Becomingmeatlast... Love the name .. I think it suits everyone here... but you claimed it..

        :welcome:

        I've had a few mornings after when I had to make the apology to a kid or two.. and I know.. it seems like it gets old after once or twice or.. more. Was going to share a story, but thought better of it...

        Somehow, they usually find room for forgiveness.. especially when they see improvement in us.

        Good for you in ordering everything... And you are right.. it is a wonderful web site to find... It's been a blessing and a lifeline for me....
        P.S. You can't love if you don't love yourself... :heart:

        As you wander through life, sister/brother, whatever be your goal, keep your eye upon the donut, and not upon the hole.
        - Sign in the Mayflower Coffee Shop, Chicago

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          #5
          Day 1 AF

          Hi Becoming,
          :welcome:
          You found the right place. I am newbie also a couple of weeks now.
          I am starting AF today 30 day plan for April, started AF slipped on day 12 ...
          I just got my supp., so I just took them.
          I look forward to getting to know you.
          Spent a couple of hours today reading posts, amazing people on this site.
          Lots of love and support,
          Gail

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            #6
            Day 1 AF

            Thanks, my new friends

            Thanks so much for the inspiring words, they mean so much. My son has forgiven me (again) but my husband is very doubtful. I don't blame him. He has a very bad drinking problem, also. He didn't drink today, either.

            I'm so exhausted today from reading the book, so many posts, the shame, fighting the morning hangover...your posts brought tears of gratitude to my eyes. I just french braided my little girl's hair (11 yrs old). She asks me often but I'm usually too drunk.

            I'm going to bed early with a good book. Tomorrow WILL be day 2 AF. It'll be nice to have remembered tonight.

            Sweet dreams to all of you. :h
            "Action is...the enemy of thought." :l Joseph Conrad

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              #7
              Day 1 AF

              Awesome.

              Patty
              Tampa, FL

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                #8
                Day 1 AF

                BecomingMe - wonderful attitude (so hopeful after a bad night - what a wonderful sign!).

                If you don't sleep well tonight - don't give up. Sometimes the first few nights are hard to find sleep...but it gets much, much better.


                Welcome and please post tomorrow so we can watch you go through Day 2!

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                  #9
                  Day 1 AF

                  Just another welcome to add,

                  I felt the same sense of hope when I read the book. Look forward to getting to know you.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Day 1 AF

                    Hi BecomingMeAtLast! Your son is the same age my daughter was when she really got tired of my drinking. She is now, at 18, finally believing that I'm really doing something about it. The look on her face and the way she acts now, it's just so nice. I cannot believe I acted that way for most of her life, wow, and most of mine too.

                    So keep your chin up......you can do it!!
                    Noelle sez "Do want you like, like what you do. Life is Good."

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Day 1 AF

                      Good morning, friends.

                      I slept through the night with the help of valarian root capsules. I did wake up a lot and sweat a lot but that doesn't surprise me. I had a lot of dreams but can't remember any of them.

                      I'm still feeling hopeful and am trying to think of how to handle tonite, from 5 p.m. until about 7 p.m. If I make it through that, I'll be okay. I can work on my book and the weather might be nice enough outside to do a little yardwork.

                      The thing that is most difficult right now is my husband. He has a short fuse and has already started the day off stomping out of the house, angry. It's a very small thing he's angry about and he tried to pick a fight with me but I didn't bite.

                      I will take glutamine at about 4 p.m. or so and have some tea ready. I will definitely be back later on today! I am now going to post for some other new people, then get my butt to work.

                      Thanks again to all :l
                      "Action is...the enemy of thought." :l Joseph Conrad

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Day 1 AF

                        A warm welcome to you becomingmeatlast. Thankyou for posting me so promptly,your imput is really helpful.I too am busy with children,business and a husband that is not always entirely supportive, I think i know where you are coming from, well you've made a good start and I hope you make many inspiring friendson this site. Good luck with day 3!!!!! Best wishes Elsie17

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                          #13
                          Day 1 AF

                          Elsie,
                          Well, your post response helped me, maybe in the nick of time, honestly! My husband just came home and, instead of being an angry bear as he was 3 hours ago (stomping out, slamming doors), now he's happy as a lark. This means I'll hear his first beer can pop in about 2 or 3 hours, mid-afternoon. I just squished an overwhelming feeling to make sure I had a bottle of wine ready for later today so I wouldn't have to deal with his slurry speech. Sigh. Wine isn't the answer, I know. If I have to leave and go out for a walk, I will. Hang in there, I will too :-)
                          "Action is...the enemy of thought." :l Joseph Conrad

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                            #14
                            Day 1 AF

                            I'm with you

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                              #15
                              Day 1 AF

                              My 3rd day AF and I almost didn't make it. I had to think the craving through to the end. The end would be to sit like a veg, around my family, drinking wine and staring at some boring crap on the TV. Have ordered supps but they haven't come yet. Instead I'm drinking water, eating chinese, reading a book and taking valarain root to get sleepy. Today was real rough. For me, I had to stop, think my actions through to what I new the outcome would be. At one point I was stomping my feet chanting, "The urge will stop, the urge will stop..." Thank God I was alone! LOL I hope the supps come soon, I need them.
                              Take care.
                              "Action is...the enemy of thought." :l Joseph Conrad

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