April Showers

[bald headed old guy]

April Showers

Liv,
Thanks, good thought for today!
This made me consider a slightly off-thread topic.
Does anyone else remember when media advertising for alcohol was not allowed? talk about pushers..it's everywhere. While I am not for censorship, certainly removing advertisements for known addictive products (tobacco as well as alcohol) would be a major step in reducing consumption.
Just my 2 cent's worth.
Stay Strong!
BHOG

[LVT25]

April Showers

You mean during prohibition BHOG????:H Sorry, couldn't resist. I do remember my first pack of cigarettes I bought. Pretty, long, gold, silver, pastel pack of Virginia Slims! I was a freshman in college and I was going to get thin too!! It still amazes me how they can make smoking look glamorized--YUCK!!:eeew:
AND they DO make that cold beer on a hot day look REALLY good!!:tempted:

No billboards where I live, better keep the TV off though. Get my subliminal CD playing here..

Thanks for the sticky guys---Have a great day!

[Riker]

April Showers

BHOG,

What really drives me nuts is going to work at 7:00 AM and catching the news on the local radio..and hearing BEER advertisements just before the news start..

It's 7:00AM for crying out loud.. The last thing I want to be reminded of is BEER !!!

Especially if I drank the night before !!!!

Riker

[Laurav]

April Showers

I lost to temptation last night. I hosted bunko (dice game that involves a lot of women drinking wine) last night. I was on day 10 and had my first real craving and totally caved and had three glasses of wine. I feel like shit because I was weak. My confidence is gone......I am sure you have heard this many times before. blah blah blah
I am dusting the dirt off of my knees and marching on.
So where the hell do I get the confidence to say no? I think THAT is where I need the counseling.
BTW…I am quitting bunko.

[livingfree]

April Showers

Hi everyone! I have my first client in a short bit - so need to get off this computer! But wanted to drop back in for a moment:

Laura - Oh honey - I can relate - for years I was quitting and wham - one game of bonkers (actually I have never played but it sounds fun) and I was the one right back in the flow of drinking. I don't think it's a bad idea to tell one close friend that you are really trying to get healthy and won't be drinking when you are with the group. If ONE person knows your intent - I think it makes it easier. For years no one knew I wanted to quit drinking - so it was just my will against - my will - which never worked. Just bringing my husband into the circle makes it so much easier for me to say NO Thanks. Fighting yourself is the hard part. But bringing someone into the circle made the difference for me.

Riker - Beer commercials at 7 am - and we wonder why a huge % of our country has drinking issues. Wow
Mimi - you kill me! V. Slims was my smoke too! I can still see the packaging and think I am missing something lovely!! What a sham!
MM - I LMArseO when I read your post yesterday!!! My thoughts EXACTLY!
RN - where are you nursie? We need you to take our blood pressure here!
Rust - Keep coming back and let us know how your doing!
BHOG - Our new tattoo for you ........ Kojack - our lead dog needs a smilie face on that bald spot! Can't you see it ...........

Ok - I HAVE to work now

Liv

[meditation mama]

April Showers

Flee temptation... OK.. I was thinking about that yesterday as I was in the kitchen of the spa and actually had to FLEE when I opened the refrigerator late after work. There is wine everywhere. I guess I am doing OK with it as I eat lunch in there everyday and see it, but it is the unopened bottles of really good white wine in the refrigerator that are still kind of tough for me. Man, I guess it will never get much easier. SO, I guess that means I really need to make a serious mind-shift around it. YEP, IT IS MY MIND - NOT THE WINE that has to change. I need to have it there for clients. That is going to be my next hurdle. So, even though this is the opposite of fleeing, it got me to think about something that I wasn't thinking about.. know what I mean? Good to have that in the open... thank you.

Laura - SHIT! Bunko is stupid then.. That's what I say. Seriously, though, when you said you were going and it was a usual drinking thing, I was a bit worried. I have to tell you it took me many attempt so quit drinking, many. BUT, the one thing I learned this time - the time I REALLY wanted to quit - I mean deep down in my gut, inner-child crying, wanting to quit, was that I HAD TO PROTECT MY OWN SOBRIETY. That meant I did not go to any functions that had alcohol for the first 30 days. I just knew that I was too vulnerable - by past experiences. Taking parties, gatherings, bars, drinking friends, etc., out of the equation made it much easier for me to focus. Anyway, just a thought for you. Dust of your knickers and get back up, girlfriend!

Have a wonderful day, my April spring chickens...

MM

[Laurav]

April Showers

Thank Liv and MM.
I am having such a personal conflict right now - well have had it for years.
I don?t want to drink again yet I don?t want to not be able to ever drink again.
I want to be free from all of this.
I just don?t want it.
I don?t want to be me.
Just feeling sorry for myself. :boohoo::boohoo:.

[Riker]

April Showers

Laura,

I totaly hear you. I'm in the same frame of mind. I did 3 days AF last week, then could not manage to go the weekend without..then it was supposed to be back to AF on Monday.. but no.. and then yesterday I really over did it.. 16 beers, woke up with a nasty hangover..called in sick from work...been logged on here pretty much all day.

I'm AF now and I won't drink today.. I feel way to crappy to even want a beer.

It's like I mentioned in another thread..why is it that I don't seem to want to quit badly enough to do it ?

Very frustrating..confusing etc.. I want to quit, but I don't want to quit forever, but I have to quit because I can't moderate, but I don't want to quit ETC ETC On and On it goes.

Let's keep reading.. and try to stay positive..
Riker

[gelgit]

April Showers

I hear what you're saying....I've been playing around with the same thoughts. I'm saying , in my head, hey! I don't have to be AF forever. A nice glass of wine now and then:H:H It's the Beast. Alcohol is just plain poison for me. Why would I want to take a little poison now and then. Why would I want to keep killing myself? Riker, I know just how you're feeling: why would I want to make myself feel that again? God, I'm actually shaking.
I'm going out for a walk in this beautiful Springtime sunshine, do some deep breathing and say some prayers for us all.:h

[FinallyRN]

April Showers

Laura, just like you I live with this conflict everyday. I can do AF, I can do it for 30 days..........( tomorrow I hit 30!!!!!!!! ) but I can't do AF for life yet, mentally, its too overwhelming. I have to be a drinker who chooses not to drink TODAY. Right now thats the only way I can handle it. If I had entered into my marriage and thought about being in it for 20 years, I don't know if I could have done it, its seems like a sentence, but letting it happen, ODAT, it added up that way without stress. The mental stuff is something I don't know if I'll ever get rid of.
And Livin, our blood pressures are fine! We're a healthy group, relax!
PS, I LOVED the 'NO" post-it...........such a powerful word

[livingfree]

April Showers

Late day post -
Gelgit - Riker & Laura - I don't know if you will be checking back tonight - but just wanted to tell you that what RN said above is SO VERY TRUE FOR ME. I can't think of a lifetime - but I loved the comparison to a husband (or wife) - (great one RN) you can't do this thinking very far out. Keep your goals on today. When tomorrow comes - you make a new decision. It just won't work thinking beyond the day you are in. So love and hugs to you and - It makes me sad that you don't want to be "you". I happen to like YOU! Our behavior is not WHO we are. It's what we are "doing".

Please have a restful evening - with out AL - Just tonight.

Love to you
Liv

[Laurav]

April Showers

Thanks Liv.
I am feeling better. I took half a day off from work and took a long nap. I am sure I will feel ever better after a good nights sleep.
Funny that I am such a control freak yet I cannot control my drinking. At least I can control whether or not I choose to drink.
My hubby pretty much wants me to tell the world that I am an alkie. God I hate that label and I sure as hell do not want to advertise that I have drinking issues. Most people do not know because I hid it so well.
I basically told him that I wanted his support, not him trying to control me because I will only rebel. I must do this my way. He said he will not mention anything unless I bring it up.
We went in on a wine tasting dinner with 10 other families that is coming up on 5/10. I told him there is no point in me going. He said I could go and just not drink. Is he smoking crack? Most of the people going are big drinkers and there would be lots of comments about me not drinking. I would just rather not deal with it. I am going to get ‘sick’ at the last moment and he will go solo.
I am feeling so sad today but that could be contributed to me getting my ‘monthly bill’ yesterday.
Thanks for you support, I would not be where I am at this moment without all of you.

[Riker]

April Showers

livingfree;303871 wrote: Late day post -
Gelgit - Riker & Laura - I don't know if you will be checking back tonight - but just wanted to tell you that what RN said above is SO VERY TRUE FOR ME. I can't think of a lifetime - but I loved the comparison to a husband (or wife) - (great one RN) you can't do this thinking very far out. Keep your goals on today. When tomorrow comes - you make a new decision. It just won't work thinking beyond the day you are in. So love and hugs to you and - It makes me sad that you don't want to be "you". I happen to like YOU! Our behavior is not WHO we are. It's what we are "doing".

Please have a restful evening - with out AL - Just tonight.

Love to you
Liv

Thanks Liv.. you re-enforce the ODAT principle and you are so right. It's just human nature to go " I've had it, I'm never ever drinking again ! " usually the next morning of a bender..but then, I do drink again, and because I said " I am never drinking etc.." then I feel even worst about it.

The day after I quit smoking, I anounced it to my family and my inlaws..to the world that I had quit smoking.. of course there was a lot of non believers..but I did quit forever, that was 6 years ago. And I truly believe with every fiber of my being that I will NEVER smoke again for as long as I live. That I can guarrantee..

Whith drinking, I would never dare anounce to anyone that I quit drinking forever.. because I would most likely drink eventualy and then well , I'm the big looser.. so for now, I only tell myself that I am not drinking TODAY.. maybe I'll drink tomorrow.. maybe I won't..but I'm certainly not going to say " forever" ..

Laura, I'm glad you are feeling a bit better...I have the support of my wife, but I've told her from the start, I have to do this my way.. and it's a "work in progress" so don't expect me to never touch a drop for as long as I live or make me feel bad if / when I do..
She's pretty good with that.. When I was 3 days AF last week, she noticed that I was drinking water with Lemon in it and said " oh , you are not drinking beer ? " Nope, not tonight, she said " I'm glad..and I love you" .. On Saturday, I had beers..she never said " oh what about the lemon water ? quit already hey !.. " no, she did not say anything..Just keeps on loving me.. She's a really great wife and I am extremely lucky to have her. I know it's really bothering her that I drink and she wishes I would stop..she wants me around when we retire..

Riker

[livingfree]

April Showers

April 4 Post em

April 4 Sticky Note



Settle For More


"There is more in us than we know. If we can be made to see it, perhaps, for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to settle for less" - Kurt Hahn
How many days do you settle for less? You expect so little out of yourself - why? Because you are afraid to fail. Do you remember "LETS ROLL" ~ September 11, 2001 One brave soul's words and a plane full of brave souls who have gone down in recent history as some of the bravest people in modern history. They gave it all they had. What if they wouldn't have? We will never know - but we can imagine the added destruction. So what might happen in your life today if you settle for more and give it ALL you've got plus some more??? Let's Roll - your life is worth it!


Liv

[Laurav]

April Showers

I am ready to settle Liv!
Thank you for the daily inspiration.
PS. I am feeling much better today!