April Showers

[Ex-Tirana]

April Showers

Question from first timer - Is this an effective alternative to AA? What strings are attached?

[bald headed old guy]

April Showers

Ex-Tirana!
:welcome:! Glad you found us. A number of the members here use this instead of AA, a number use it with AA, and some perhaps have never considered AA for thier own good reasons.
I would suggest that you might want to read up some of the wide variety of posts on here, these threads go back some 3 years I beleive, and there is a LOT of good wisdom in them. You will also probably find yourself reading stories very similar to your own.
For me, and I have only been on here slightly longer than 3 months, this site has been a life-saver. It has enabled me to see I am not alone in my struggle with AL or ALice(nicknames a lot of the users give to alcohol), and has enabled me to become A/F (alcohol free). In some ways, it does work similar to my understanding of AA, that is the buddy system..when you want to get a drink, get on here instead and chat, post, read..fill your mind with other thoughts than drinking.
There is a very good book called "My Way Out" by Roberta Jewell, founder of this site; it is avaliable as a download or order on this site, or through various on-line and brick and morter type bookstores. A lot of advice on suppliments, medicaitons, and how to deal with the various feelings you will experience as you begin this wonderful journey.
Please post often! let us know how you are doing, and join in with your thoughts and concerns and ideas. As you read over the various threads, you will find that no subject is really taboo, or a strange one.. I am constantly amazed at how many people are like myself and I believe like yourself, on here all the time.
Oh, one more thing..there are no "strings" attached!
I look forward to hearing more from you!
Enjoy Life!
BHOG

[LVT25]

April Showers

:upset: My Internet provider suspended my service over the weekend!:durn: I finally got it back after 3 hours on hold yesterday, transfers, busy signals, run around, and finally someone that would help me this a.m. I MISSED YOU GUYS!!:h
It's gonna take me a week to get caught up!

Dear EX--no strings, really!!


:illbeback:

[livingfree]

April Showers

LVT25;306846 wrote: :upset: My Internet provider suspended my service over the weekend!:durn: I finally got it back after 3 hours on hold yesterday, transfers, busy signals, run around, and finally someone that would help me this a.m. I MISSED YOU GUYS!!:h
It's gonna take me a week to get caught up!

Dear EX--no strings, really!!


:illbeback:

Wow - that's like having to sit in the naughty corner!! :H Missed you!

[LVT25]

April Showers

Thanks, Liv---ull it was a LITTLE frustrating, just another one of the good Lord's tests to teach me patience! :lordhelpme:

[bald headed old guy]

April Showers

Patience

Good Morning Everyone!

LVT25,
Thanks for the idea for the stick em for today!

PATIENCE!

Today's society is based upon instant gratification. We have come to expecct our food, package goods, even dry cleaning to be on on the spot-or even better, ready as soon as we walk in the door! 24 hours sports, news and entertainment channels are available. Of course, the internet has contributed to this very fast paced life.

We also know that the really good tings in life take time...roses, my favorite flower, take weeks of work to cultivate, prune, and shape into the beautiful bushes i enjoy in the summer evenings.

So it is, I believe, with this journey. We did not acquire our drinking habits overnight, they took time and money (energy) to develop. They also will take time and energy to remove! If you find yourself frustrated, as we all do, with the seemingly slow process of ridding yourself of AL or ALice, remember the wisdom of the unknown child, who told his mom:

"Be patient with me, God is not finished with me yet!"

Have a Wonderful Day!

BHOG

[meditation mama]

April Showers

Thanks, BHOG!

Pateince.. that is always a good reminder for me. Especially when it comes to myself. I know that each day that I stay on my path something new will reveal itself to me. Sometimes I don't like it, but these days Mostly I do.

On the difficult days, I remember this quote - I keep it close....

If grief or anger arises,
Let there be grief or anger.
This is the Buddha in all forms,
Sun Buddha, Moon Buddha, Happy Buddha, Sad Buddha.
It is the universe offering all things
to awaken and open our heart.

If there is an emotion, just let it be an emotion.. Like a craving. If there is a craving, just let there be a craving. We don't have to act on these things. This requires PATIENCE. Patience lets you access that point in between the emotion and acting on the emotion. It is a very small point at first, but the more you work on patience and live in this space the larger and larger that space becomes. It is within that space that courage, strength and love live.

So, today I will use my pateince to live in that space - as uncomfortable as it is sometimes. I will live there and make it larger...stretching my arms. Like having one hand on the emotion and one hand on the actions.. and me in the middle not letting them touch for as long as I can. Each time I do this it grows larger. Then when I need to go to this reservoir of patience to dip into courage, strength and love - it is there, welcoming me. I just close my eyes and breath and there it is.

Have a fanstastic day everyone!

MM

[livingfree]

April Showers

Patience - that is a virtue that I have never owned. So today I am going to keep it in the front of my mind in all things.... Patience. It's just that little voice in my head saying "I want it better today"..... "I want it fixed today" ........... "I want it NOWWWWW"

Ok so the imp on my shoulder has been knocked off - and today I will practice patience!

Thank you BHOG (I think we should call you BHG - I don't think you are old! Old is a state of mind and yours is not old!) See there I go RN ........ changing peoples names again!

Great Wed. to all
Liv

[LVT25]

April Showers

Gosh, BHOG, :bigwink: I feel so special! :H

It's so true--patience has never been one of my virtures, but I really am better. Much better when I'm not dealing with a hangover!!

MM--well said also. Uncomfortable--that's all cravings, urges or some feelings are! They will pass, or we can replace them with some thought that's more comfortable!!

THANKS GUYS, HAVE A GREAT DAY ALL!

[FinallyRN]

April Showers

Hi everybody! Did you miss me?
I have been soooooo busy, I haven't been able to post but now I have my life back. My friend went back home yesterday after a 2 week visit.
Patience huh? What's that? I have a theory about AL and addictions in general. I think our lives are so over extended, my life is 80% work and only 15-20% play, that when I get home there is an immediate need for unwinding. I get home at 7 pm sometimes, so I have 2 hours to cook dinner, re-group with the family and get to bed by 9:30, because I have to be at work by 7 am. Wine helped me unwind so I could talk. NOT ANYMORE! I have a long way to go but its a constant fight to maintain balance. Its better.
And Livin.........you can call me anything you want. "Finally" came from the relief of finding this site. Finally, an alternative to AA, to the way I was living, to finally finding help. "RN" obvious, but I added it thinking I might be able to help in some way medically.
Patience huh? I don't have any! I'm going to fail this post-it.

[Laurav]

April Showers

Patience??!!! I do not have time for that. Hardy Har Har

[bald headed old guy]

April Showers

If the good Lord had wanted me to have Patience he would have helped me becoem a dr!
BHOG to Mrs. BHOG on more than one occiasion when raising children.
Seriously, it is a virtue we all need to work more on..except maybe MM. sounds like she has it figured out real well!
Enjoy the balance of your day!
BHOG

[bald headed old guy]

April Showers

Stick Em for April 10

Good Day to everyone!

Today's Sticky...

I am Evolving

I think all of us are "labeled" not only by ourselves, but by those around us, in many ways. For example, "she is an overachiver," he is overprotective," etc. All of these labels are actually nothing more than a snapshot of each of us at a particular point in time. Our lives, however, are actually a moving picture, a constantly evolving epic. As the scenery changes and the actors grow in the movie, so we ourselves are constantly changing and growing. We are not what we were yesterday, a year ago, or five years ago, unless in our minds we become a "freeze frame" and remain where others, and ourselves, have cast us.

One of the most dangerous labels we hear, and tell ourselves, "he/she drinks too much." While this may have been true at one instant in time, each day or each hour we do not drink makes a lie out of this label!

For today, Evolve! Become a non-drinker! Press "play" and start the movie of your llife, as you want it to be, without paying attention to the labels placed upon you in the past!

Enjoy Life!
BHOG

And thanks for stopping by April Showers!

[cowgal]

April Showers

Thanks!

Thanks for the sticky BHOG! What a great message/concept! I am evolving every day..........cool.:thumbs:

You are inspiring, I needed some sort of message to ground myself today, as I am feeling very pressured here at work/home/life. Not going to drink over it, at least not TODAY!!:cheering

Everyone have a wonderful Thursday.

love and hugs,:l:h

Mary Anne

[meditation mama]

April Showers

bald headed old guy;307561 wrote: Seriously, it is a virtue we all need to work more on..except maybe MM. sounds like she has it figured out real well!

Don't I wish...:H

But I do keep trying to figure things out.. almost to a fault..

But I am definately EVOLVING! What a wonderful thought for the day. I think sometimes we definately forget that we are evolving. Everyday I feel like I am getting stronger, learning from past mistakes (hopefully), taking baby-steps to new, healthy lifestyles, opening up to the world around me, asking for help. Evolving into the person I have always dreamed of and knew was inside me. I still make mistakes, but I think I am starting to learn it is part of the process - evolution. Very good reminder!

Thanks BHOG!

Have a grand day everyone.

Namaste,

MM