So, I've been AF now for 54 days and am very proud of this fact.
My husband is away on a training course this week and I am in the house by myself. On the way back from work yesterday I stopped into the supermarket to buy dinner for myself and my eyes fell upon a nice half price bottle of Wine. I thought to myself, 'I could actually go home and drink that tonight and nobody would have to know!' But I kept walking.
Then I passed a fridge unit that had some nifty little cans of Gin and Tonic for only a pound each, and I thought 'I could drink those at home tonight and nobody would ever know' But I kept walking
Then I saw some ?4 bottles of vodka and thought 'That'd get me nicely plastered tonight and no one would have to know!' But I kept walking.
I got home with no AL, but it was the first time in a long time that I seriously considered buying some and taking it and drinking it all and getting shit faced. I'm glad I didn't.
I think the only thing that stopped me was the fact I am so close to 60 days. That and I know from bitter experience that I cannot Mod, I would have been back to day one (I know some people would say don't reset the days, but it's one of the ways I keep myself motivated to stick at it, I've got to do it properly!
) and I'd have to start lying to hubbo again, I couldn't tell him I'd started drinking again as he'd think he can't trust me to be alone anymore, and I may as well just keep drinking because I'm back to day one etc etc.......
But anyway, I don't have to because I resisted temptation, and it feels better than any glass of wine! This place really helps, even though I don't post that much I come and read pretty much every day
Sorry if this is a bit rambly, just offloading!
My husband is away on a training course this week and I am in the house by myself. On the way back from work yesterday I stopped into the supermarket to buy dinner for myself and my eyes fell upon a nice half price bottle of Wine. I thought to myself, 'I could actually go home and drink that tonight and nobody would have to know!' But I kept walking.
Then I passed a fridge unit that had some nifty little cans of Gin and Tonic for only a pound each, and I thought 'I could drink those at home tonight and nobody would ever know' But I kept walking
Then I saw some ?4 bottles of vodka and thought 'That'd get me nicely plastered tonight and no one would have to know!' But I kept walking.
I got home with no AL, but it was the first time in a long time that I seriously considered buying some and taking it and drinking it all and getting shit faced. I'm glad I didn't.
I think the only thing that stopped me was the fact I am so close to 60 days. That and I know from bitter experience that I cannot Mod, I would have been back to day one (I know some people would say don't reset the days, but it's one of the ways I keep myself motivated to stick at it, I've got to do it properly!
) and I'd have to start lying to hubbo again, I couldn't tell him I'd started drinking again as he'd think he can't trust me to be alone anymore, and I may as well just keep drinking because I'm back to day one etc etc.......But anyway, I don't have to because I resisted temptation, and it feels better than any glass of wine!
This place really helps, even though I don't post that much I come and read pretty much every daySorry if this is a bit rambly, just offloading!
ray:
Comment