Not doing so well

[auntiegriselda]

I had one day AF and then fell right back into a bottle of wine a day. I just can't seem to stay away from it. Every day I tell myself on the way home from work....today I'm not going to drink, but then I do. Work has been very stressful but should soon be better. Tomorrow I'll try again.
I love wine and hate it.
:upset:
Auntie

[KateH1]

Not doing so well

Hi Auntie, I wondered where you were. I remember the last time you were here you were really stressed out about your daughter and her need to get a job. Has she found one yet? What's going on?

I know exactly what you mean about the love/hate relationship with wine. That was my challenge for a very long time! I am so glad to have finally ended that realationship! You can do it too! What can we do to help you?

XXX Kate

[auntiegriselda]

Not doing so well

Thanks Kate, I tend not to post when I'm drinking. I don't know what anyone can do. I have to get a grip on this again. My daughter is still doing babysitting, which is ok but not so good for a 38 year old. I think my biggest stresser is work. Lots of stuff going on.
Thanks for listening.
Auntie

[BecomingMeAtLast]

Not doing so well

Hi Auntie,
That was me...a (big) bottle of wine a day after work. I'm on my 2nd AF day and am okay,
could be better. I wish you the best, tomorrow is a new day, a new start. I feel EXACTLY
the same way you do, I love wine and I hate it. I love the first glass, then the second, then
what's the point?
Take care, don't let the job get the best of you.
BecomingMe

[auntiegriselda]

Not doing so well

Thanks Becoming. I am going to try again tomorrow. I sometimes wonder why can't I just be normal and enjoy one or two drinks? If I can just get 2 or 3 days under my belt I can do it.

[BecomingMeAtLast]

Not doing so well

I wonder that, too, and it makes me mad sometimes. If I've had one or two, all I can think about is more, more, more. It's so hard sometimes when I just want to be normal. I know exactly how you feel. I wish I had an answer, I'm just hear for ya. There's got to be a way out, others have done it :-)

[optionsgirl]

Not doing so well

Hi All,
Ditto, Ditto and Ditto
Just one step at a time..
Start 3rd day AF...
It's witching hour for me and major headache...
I just need to stay out of the stores and I will be fine.
Take Care All
Gail

[Riker]

Not doing so well

Auntie,

Like everyone else who responded, count me in as yet another one who loves Beer but hates the hangover / crap the next day. I did 3 days AF last week, then Saturday hit and all bets were off..no AF days since last Sat.

I go through the day vowing, swearing that I will NOT drink today, then 4PM hits, quitting time and instead of heading straight home, I stop at the local beer store and pick up a 12 pack for the evening.

The next morning, it's 6:30am and I'm lying in bed, wife is waking me up to go to work and I just want to sink in the mattress, close the lights, shut the world down..That's when I really hate myself, that's when I say " what the f**k did you do that for ..AGAIN.., you stupid moron"..It's like that signature someone here has..I forget who at the moment..but it says, "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result" I already know how I'm going to feel in the morning, yet, I buy the beer, I drink the beer, I feel bad that I drank the beer, and I wake up the next day wishing with all my heart that I didn't drink the beer..And on and on it goes..

I think that if I really wanted to stop, I would. I think that for some stupid reason, I'm not ready or willing to stop. Why would I keep doing the same thing every day if I really wanted to stop ?

I quit smoking cold turkey after 18 1/2 years of puffing away a pack or more a day. I just decided on Wednesday November 14 2001 at 10:30pm that the cigarette in my mouth was the last one I was ever going to smoke..and it was..that was it .period. Anyone who smokes can attest to the fact that it's very hard to quit, but I just did it. I was ready to quit. I'm not sure I am totaly comitted to quitting the beer, if I was truly serious about it, I would simply stop. Like I stopped the smoking.

Anyways, thanks to this wonderful place, I get to ramble on and get a few things off my chest without anyone giving me heck for it.

I know what you are going through, cause I'm right there with you..but I also know that deep down, we can stop, yes, it's super hard to do, but it's been done by many others, so why not us ? why not indeed.

Take care, be strong,

Riker

[Ask For Help]

Not doing so well

Something to think about

Hi guys:

I was drinking a bottle of wine a night and waking each morning with the same guilt/shame/remorse and promise not to do the same tonight.

I started to see a counselor who said: "Do me one favor: please stop with the guilt/shame and remorse. It won't make you drink less. So please just stop all that. I'm interested in why you drink. Could you pay attention to that? How do you feel before you drink. Come talk to me about that."

Well, who knew that the feelings of guilt, shame and remorse could be turned off, granted, with permission of a counselor. But I do believe that permission, and the encouragement to think about "why", gave me the courage to try My Way Out. After several weeks of "curiosity" about my reasons for drinking ( and frankly, relief from all the negative feelings about my drinking) I independently chose to try for 30 days AF. I didn't make it, but 90 days later, I feel pretty safe in saying . . . although I'd always qualify, who knows what could happen tomorrow? . . . I have been able to moderate my drinking for 3 months and feel I've gotten my life back.

All a long way of saying . . . YOU CAN DO IT. Please give it a try. Read the book. Take the supps. Take the plunge . . . Join a thread and say "I'm in". Set yourself up in DrinkTracker and try it. If you don't do consecutive AF days, marvel at how much less you drink, or in how many AF days/ month day you have . . . progress , not perfection.
God Bless.
AFH

[gelgit]

Not doing so well

Hey, Riker, I quit smoking exactly the same way -just like that!!- many years ago, but never could pull it off with the booze! Drinking wine, yea, there's a couple of fine vintages stashed in that wine rack of hubbie's, that will really be a difficult situation for me when their corks gets pulled. It will be for some dinner with friends and I'm dreading the occasion already and I don't even know just when that might happen. I'm a binger. 3 days has been the longest run for me. I've stopped so many times, for so many years, I couldn't begin to estimate the cost in money, trust, pain and lost to myself and my 3 kids.

Through all of years of trying to drink in moderation, I've collected a few facts/myths??? See if any of you have heard them also:

People who drink to excess: ie. they don't stop when they get drunk like most people do, have a different enzyme that doesn't make them feel sick and stop.

Heavy drinkers have a different gene that allows their systems to adapt and to tolerate toxins better than average. IE. they will survive pollutants and plague better than the average person

And the best!

People who drink to excess on a regular basis are very talented in the arts and have a much higher intelligence.

Man, are we special or what:H

[Riker]

Not doing so well

Gelgit,

Yes, we certainly are :H

So, why bother trying to stop ? we have better enzymes in our genes and we are resistant to disease..Great.. let's party :H I sometimes refer to having a beer as rocket fuel ..got to fuel up !.

Actualy, I'm convinced that the high level of constant alcohol in our blood stream acts as a natural and perpetual sterilizing agent that destroys any patogen / virus that dares enter our bodies.. LOL.. I wish that was the case ..We would all be the healthiest bunch around, because of our special genes of course..

You know, I've got to tell you something.. there is really no point at all in worrying about an event that has not even been planned yet ! Really .. that's just counter productive..
I will admin that I do worry about events that are planned, like the rock concert I'm going to on April 12th and the other one on May 23rd. Then there is the annual BBQ at my place with all my friends, which I could put AF beer in a glass and no one would know..worse comes to worse you know..

[gelgit]

Not doing so well

Yes, Riker, that's my point. It's just something for the Committee in my head to keep me thinking about drinking. Big concerts are worrisome mainly because, just by being in the crowd, you're going to get a contact high. At least that is the case all along the West Coast down here! That includes weddings and funerals these days too! Holding a glass with ice in it will get you through everything else. And ALL the pressure is off for the senior set. The "thing" for us now is bottled water (not plastic) You become irreproachable with a glass bottle in your hand:H even though it used to be filled with vodka, our health just can't do it anymore.
So, don't worry about your upcoming events. Look forward to how much you'll be enjoying yourself! :h

[bald headed old guy]

Not doing so well

AntieG,
Perhaps you might want to look into the 'triggers" that make you want the drink? Is there a particular repeat event that is giving AL his entry key?
You might try getting online when you reach a witching hour, or when a trigger goes off. There are lots of people on here to chat with, or you can read some of the posts you may have missed. I don't recall, are you using any of the suppliments or medicaitons? They do help with cravings.
Water, water, and more water...or my favorite, cranberry juice and soda. It does taste good..and I used to drink a LOT of good wines!
Hope the next day is a good wone for you!
Stay Strong!
BHOG

[Spring Fever]

Not doing so well

Auntie,
I'm not really sure how I ended up here since I never get into chats. However, I would like to share with you something amazing that has happened to me. I have drank every single night for the past 15 years. I started moving my time earlier and earlier and calling it night. 4 weeks ago I was at the library, not for this reason, and came across the book "Sober...and staying that way- by Susan Powter). I read it and then orderd a copy and haven't had a drink since. This makes no sense to me except, I did everything she said in the book and it WORKS!! at least it has for me. The only craving I have had ( not a big deal, I made a smoothie) was being outside, looking at the lake in this spring weather, really wanting a glass of wine, a cold beer, or a rum and coke would have been great. I got the book on Wednesday, went to the Herb store on Friday, and I have been taking what it explains in the book, and I cannot get over how easy this has been. I have so much energy and the days just aren't lasting long enough. The only negative that I have is that I can't go to sleep at night. That was the drink until you go to sleep habit. Not pushing the book on anyone, but thought you may want to give it a try. It certainly, so far, has been a miracle in my life.
God Bless:

[KateH1]

Not doing so well

Hello Again, Auntie,

I've been thinking about you since I read your post today. So, I have been thinking. Why don't you just start stopping by here each day and reading. When you feel like it, post and share with us. It just might help you to understand that we are all in the same boat, and we can and will all help each other. Many of us were still drinking, at least for a while when we were coming here regularly, and some how along the way........Our Way Out appeared!! Maybe being here will help you too!

Wishing You Peace and Health,
XX Kate