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Why is it????

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    Why is it????

    Why is it that I don't have cravings every day? I can easliy go 3-4 days w/o drinking. Then I give myself a reward....nice bottle of wine....keep it under control...then a day or 2 later....it's 2 bottles. It's because of this that I never thought I had a problem with alcohol. Then I get mad when I see others drinking at dinner or somewhere. Why can't I do that and control it?

    I read someone said their "evil twin" appears...That's me! I'm horrible. Foul mouthed. Mean. Complete and total *itch...I hate that twin and it's horrible the next morning when my kids start telling me things and i have no idea what they are talking about. I started pretending that I remember, but they know. I have 4 kids..14, 12, 8, and 7. They have seen way more than they should at their young ages.

    Sorry for rambling I have a lot of weird feelings right now. I guess it's a little anxiety about starting the topo tonight....

    #2
    Why is it????

    Chemicals and enzymes - I think that says it all! A very nice counsillor told me that when we have certain drinking patterns, our physical body gets used to being medicated in a certain way, so after a couple of days our body starts to get distressed and asks for its usual dose. The old brain kicks in as well and there you have a double whammy.

    I am EXACTLY the same, no problems for 3-5 days then one then two bottles, then ok for 3-5 days then one bottle then two bottles and on it goes. Breaking the cycle means alot and that is why it takes time.

    Right now I am feeling a little stressed and could easily go over the edge if I had wine at home, which I dont, so I have to get over the wave to the calm waters on the other side. It does happen if I can hold out.

    Just remember, Rome wasnt built in a day.

    Jools xx

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      #3
      Why is it????

      I'm in the same, exact boat

      Get along for a few days very well, actually start to feel physically and mentally better, and then I slip back. I too have black outs. I feel very ashamed. I am so glad I found this board. Hopefully we can all help each other out. I haven't searched very much yet, but I am wondering if there is a live chat room somewhere, to get support when I feel like sliding. Can anyone tell me if there is such a place on this website? Thanks in advance.

      Best of luck. I truly understand.

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        #4
        Why is it????

        Re: I'm in the same, exact boat

        I think I'm gonna cry! Just knowing that there are others feeling just like me. I always thought I was completely alone. Never admitting it to anyone. Even when I was sprawled on the hood of a police car being handcuffed and going to jail for PI. (I was drinking wine and vodka shots at a standing room only concert and got into a fight with another woman over floor space!) How pathetic!! I STILL wouldn't admit I had a binge drinking problem or ANY kind of problem! That was one year ago on May 10th. I fortunately got 6 months deffered adjudication and it dropped off my record. Thank God because I'm a school teacher of all things! Talk about ashamed. If I hadn't chosen to drink that night I would have enjoyed a great concert. Anyway....no use looking back...I'm doing very well....4th day on topo and supps...first CD last night... I feel strong but do know it's a day at a time thing! At least NOW I can say it....I have a drinking problem!

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          #5
          Why is it????

          Re: I'm in the same, exact boat

          I guess I'm the oldie of the bunch here and not a newbie. It hasn't been too many days ago I was in day 4. Glad you Guys are here, and hope we continue to see you around. Nowhere will you find more people with the same problem in common, drinking, and the same interest, to stop, than at this site. Welcome. This is day 10 for me. Unlike some of you, I was afraid (I didn't trust myself without all the help I could get) to start abs until I had everything in place, ie: AllOne, CD's, Book, Sups, etc. It took over a week to get it all together. I started everything at one time on May 6, and let me tell you, it's working!!! I was so scepticle. I took part in a program at the university in our city where they were doing a recearch study on treatment for alcoholism. I was given Naltrexone and Camprol along with psyco. counseling. This lasted for 90 days, and worked OK for that length of time but when it was over and I was on my own for a while, I went back to what I enjoyed most. They did call me back for a follow up, but by then I was my old heavily drinking self again, and didn't want any part of them. I believe this program would have been successful had it included aspects that are available to us in MYO. What they did was good and has been been approved by the FDA for treatment for alcoholism. The MYO program, so far, has worked amazingly well. I can tell the CD's are working with sleep, with my thinking, and my attitude. The AllOne is too rich for me, and I feel a little nauseous for a short time, but it doesn't last long. The benefit in the long run will probably be worth it. The Calms Forte sooths my nerves and cravings as well as helps with sleep. In 10 days, I have had 1 and 1/2 glasses of wine, and what's amazing, I didn't want any more. This was on day 7 and I didn't drink because I was craving it, I guess I was just testing myself. (I've explained my flimsy excuse in other post.) What I want to say, is that my cravings ended after day 6. That's not to say they won't come back. I have read posts from those who have had them later on. If that's the case, you'll find me here looking for all the support I can get from this great group. Thanks for being here. Eliziby

          Comment


            #6
            Why is it????

            Thanks for all the replies, folks.

            As I sit here just home from work and pour the first glass of wine ... which probably won't stop till I finish the bottle ... chardonnay and I mean the BIG bottle (liter and 1/2).

            Of course I do know better.... Eliziby, hope I spelled that right and I'm sorry if I didn't, you told me I should post elsewhere and I will start a new thread right after I register. Then off to look at the products and check for the chat board. Thank you, thank you all.

            To Eliziby, thanks for telling some of your story. I'm a professional too and I got nabbed for DUI and spent quite a few hours in jail. The cuffs, the whole thing, but I was lucky .... no one at my job found out, at least to my best knowledge, because usually they print the police blotter every day and my arrest was on a Friday and somehow, thank the Lord, it got overlooked. I too had to take Alcohol/drug classes and my charges were also "dropped". I hired an attorney and boy, did I pay for that stupidity. the DUI. What I did find out is, it might not show as an arrest on your record, but I refused the breathalyzer cuz the arresting officer told me I was going to lose my license for the max amount of time anyway, so I sadly (and drunkenly) said, then what's the point? What he failed to tell me was that if I had taken it and flunked I would have lost my license for only 3 months, versus 6. Tough noogies on me. The information IS on my record; my insurance agent, good soul that she is, looked it up when I wanted to shop around for new car insurance. It said I had refused the breathalyzer. Fortunately my ins. co. did not drop me because they apparently did not bother to check before renewing me ... so again, for that I am grateful.

            I hope to start getting everything together tonight and then really pledge off ... but see me under another thread to see all the problems I really have!


            loosing touch

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              #7
              Why is it????

              Re: Thanks for all the replies, folks.

              Hey there, Losingtouch, Welcome aboard.
              I've been there, with the DUI & classes etc...:rolleyes not a fun place to be ... rather expensive, and depending on where you live... it's almost impossible to get to all of the classes, meetings, community service work, victoms impact panels...evaluation. all w/out a license! I live 10 mi upstream & out of town(not w/out a paddle though!
              I am very grateful I was never in an accident due to my drinking, and very thankful to not have hurt anyone by it (at least physically)....My Hubby, I'm sure could tell a few stories about my "Evil Twin":eek :hat :evil .
              Anyway, I'm glad you've found us, hang in there. And keep posting. It'll get better. Hugs, Judie

              Comment


                #8
                Why is it????

                Thanks, Judie.

                I am trying, I too am grateful that I never injured anyone (except of course myself) or caused property damage, etc.

                Hugs back at you.
                Rock (I was loosing touch but I had a helluva time getting registered last night)

                Comment


                  #9
                  Why is it????

                  Re: De Nada!

                  sounds like you're doing better! Stick around... It does get much better...There's a wonderful group of people here & a ton of support, sorry about yesterday.
                  I'm so glad you came back!

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