ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

[Bessie]

Sorry! Thought I would leave the mistake in. Feels like a Saturday for some reason!! :H

Anyway, I got up at 5.30 specially to finish the holiday let ironing and make their welcome muffins and here I am 45 minutes later still on here!! I better get on so I'll keep today's start brief.

I'm not even going to mention the weather (gnash! gnash! gnash!) but I will mention that I managed another AF night on my own with the help of LGlut. That stuff really does work!!
I had NO cravings to struggle through. So much easier than the mental battle. I had a big glass of AF wine (actually it says it is 0.5% so it's NOT actually AF but still better than the 13% Pinotage I like!!) just to finish off the bottle with my dinner (reheated, 4 day old rabbit curry and then some flapjack!! I really must do something about making an effort with my food when I am on my own!!!) Ideas for quick and easy healthy meals for one please!!

So, L-Glut lined up for tonight. Take it about 6pm with a handful of the other supps and set myself up. I've got the BFZ in my drink tracker already and it is going to stay there!

Funnily enough I don't feel as good as I expected physically or mentally but the fact I have been able to get up at 5.30 easily (my preferred time) is a good sign. And the mental stuff is down to the weather.... which I just WON'T mention!!

Have a great Friday all and remember it is just another day.

:l To all to come. Jump on board and let us know how you are.

Bessie xx

[Ripple]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

as i see it today.

good morning Bessie dear.. there are only two BIG sins~the first is to interfere with the growth of another human being, and the 2nd one is to interfere with one’s own growth.

Happiness is such an elusive state. How often do “thoughts” for others involve “hidden” ideas for my own agenda? How often is my search for happiness a pile of rocks in the path of growth for another, or even myself? Seeking growth through humility and acceptance brings things that appear to be anything but good, wholesome and vital. Yet in looking back, I can see that pain, struggles and setbacks have all contributed eventually to serenity through growth.
I ask my Higher Power to help me not cause another’s lack of growth today - or my own. :thanks:

[Gathings]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Good Morning, Good Morning!

Wow! It's really Friday! I made it another week! This week was wayyyyy easier than last! Day 13 is starting out pretty well! I got caught up last night in reading different posts, and ended up going to bed quite late, but it's funny that even though I'm waking up a bit sleepy-eyed, I still feel a heck of a lot better than when I'd pass out early from drinking.
Somehow, I think tonights not going to be as difficult as last Friday, either. Whew! It's nice to feel like a complete person, again!
To all my ODATimers - have a fun--filled Friday! I will check back in later this afternoon:l

[Seto]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Morning to you all
I have to be more constant with my posts. Didn't manage to get online yesterday or the day before. Hubby doesn't agree with the "internet chat" thing and a lot of the time I post in private. So, I have to be completely honest with you all and myself, otherwise there is no point to this. Tuesday night might have been a great turning point for me. My hubby came home from London at 5pm and I had had the day from hell. Kids ill and screaming all day, a lot of anxiety on my behalf. Anyhow my thought trail started to go like this "oh, when hubby comes back he won't be drinking as he is tired after a hard day travelling, so I can have some wine and he can be there for the kids", by 8 pm I had managed to get my wine. 9pm hubby goes to sleep and old me starts drinking alone. I demolished a bottle of wine and off I go at 10 pm to buy more, even though I know I don't need it. So I come back after buying another bottle (not caring that I am running down a dark street at 10 pm just to get another fix). So what do I do, I demolish that as well. I go to bed and fall asleep not remembering much after about half a bottle of the second bottle. Why oh why do I want to be so self destructive. Wednesday morning was the worst in a long time, the guilt, the regret, the shame, oh I could go on but don't want to depress anyone. I wanted to go to rehab and begged my husband in the wake of Wednesday morning to take me. He refused, but we had a "talk" which I feel better for. He is supportive and will help me with this in any way he can. I want to end this relationship with old AL once and for all. I am like a time bomb waiting to explode again if I have more drink. Has any of you been in the situation where you have done what I have done or anything similar or worse even? On a good and positive note I have had 2 days and nights AF and I am sooooooooooo happy. This is just the beginning and like you said Ripple maybe I have to go through this pain, struggle and setback to find serenity and peace for myself. I am sure of one thing, I am not the same person I was 1 month ago. I am aware, I am awake to this problem I have, to be powerful against AL I have to avoid him completely, otherwise AL will always win in the end for me.
Well done Bessie on another sober night, the alcohol free wine sounds like a smart idea, might try that in social situations. I can understand what you mean about healthy eating, on the 2 days I have had AF my eating habits have escalated with major sugar cravings. I am back on my weightwatchers diet today though, wish me luck. I'm off to the cinema tonight with hubby and we are going so that wine o'clock time will be right in the middle of the film - my conscious effort. So tonight will definately be another AF under the belt. lots of love to you all SetoXXX

[Mad Mummy]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Big Fat Zero

Hi everyone, just wanted to celebrate my big fat zero for yesterday - all you others put me to shame but I'm feeling good and going running tonight - why do I drink when I feel so good when I don't............................................. ....

[Cinders]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Seto,

You are so NOT alone on the drinking a bottle and running out to get another, etc.

I've done that at 8:00 a.m. in the morning!!

I hope you can get to where you need to be to get AF. I was like you a year or so ago, by the time I finally went to rehab, a "fix" to wake up a fix or two at lunch and a couple or three bottles of wine in the afternoons were a normal daily intake. I don't even want to go to when I was really throwing them back!!

This is a progessive "disease" and I have found it seldom gets better and does get worse.

Good luck and if I can do it, you can do it.

Love,
Cindi
XXXIV

[rustop61]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Hi everybody

Seto I could have written your story word for word. Why do we put ourselves through this? It does get easier but you need to be constantly vigalent. I have come from drinking a bottle of wine a night to being 90% AF the past 6 months. I would like to become 100% as once I drink its very easy to slide back into old habits. However, with the help of my MWO friends I'm getting there ODAT. Day 19 on my current 30 Day stint.

Rustop

[caseaday]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Good morning/afternoon everyone! Starting day 5 of AF and feeling pretty good. For some strange reason I had absolutely no cravings yesterday. I didn't really realize that fact until I went to bed. Hope the same thing happens today.

Seto...Prior to Monday of this week I was pretty much on the same drinking schedule as you described. It is amazing how a person can rationalize every single drink as one makes it through their day!

I made a mental list of all the benefits of being AF. I.e. being able to drive my car with out looking for the police every second, losing weight, not smelling like booze all the time, etc. Maybe you could develop a list of your own to refer to ensure you are really embracing the benefits of being AF.

Have a great day everyone!

[LVT25]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Good Friday to all!!

Gathings...good for you!!! You really are doing great--pretty inspiring I think.:goodjob:

ripple--I swear you get better looking everytime I log on here, thank you for the 2 sins reflection....I'm copying that one down.

Seto, you have the knowledge and the tools it sounds like. Support of hubby and you are aware.....you can do this!

I'm running out of time, but I recognize you all are doing really well. As a moderator it's hard for me to brag about how many days AF, but I will say, it's been almost 3 weeks since I've been drunk, and have been able to cut WAY down on my consumption!

Have a good day all!!

[Croft]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Morning all! Weather is finally warming up here in Boulder, CO! Snow from Wednesday all melted and the sun is shining bright against the flatirons.

Bessie - come for a visit! I have a bottle of L-Glut and all the AF wine a gal can drink!

[cowgal]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Friday!!!

Hey all, Bessie, hope you have a great holiday!!

Gathings, good job..........you are doing great.:goodjob:

Ripple,thanks for the words of advice, reminds me of AA, which I am diligently working w/ to help me in this journey..................

Seto, hang in there, we have all been there, we are here for you..........know that.

Mummy, good for you, keep on going, you can do it! Don't worry about us, we are all only on today, stay focused on your progress, but hopefully we can inspire you!!:l

Cindi, you sound so wonderful, your daughter is still in my thoughts and prayers....

Rustop, you sound great too, have a great weekend!

LVT..........you are doing wonderfully at mods, keep up the good work.............I am secretly jealous, cuz I don't really think I can "drink successfully" anymore...........

Croft..........I wanna come visit!!! You live in an awesome place.......Glad your weather is a bit more "hospitable" now, I have seen the fires and the snow on the news, WOW!!!

love and hugs!!!:h:l
MA

[happy4once]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Bessie - I always feel great when I see that you've made it through another night to your own satisfaction (like when you mod the way you want or when you can post a BFZ). Also, I find it takes me about a week to recover physically after I've had a night off of modding (if I have more than 2 drinks one night...seems to stay with you a long, long time). Please share what type of NonAL wine you are drinking. I have been substituting Pomegranite - oj - gingerale in a wine glass for special dinners, and have to admit, I kind of crave it now (that pomegranite is such a different taste, it feels like an AL beverage) but would like some nonAL choices as well.

Seto...my heart goes out to you. We've all been there to varying degrees. Are you doing the supps or the CDs or anything? I could not, could not, could not stop until I did the CDs & the supps...and with them, the sugar craving, pain and insominia which fed my cravings (or the idea that wine was helping), subsided enough that making it through the first couple of days..then weeks...was finally attainable. Keep at it, keep trying. We all stumbled many times before finding our personal paths 'out'. And 'out' as you can see from this thread, is still a daily battle sometimes, but worth it.

Cindi - Gathings - Croft - MadMommy - Caseaday - LV - rustop - Ripple - a big shout out to all of you for doing so well each day. (sorry if I missed a name)

It's cloudy here in Chicago but no rain. I am knee deep in a way too many inspirational books. I got so many of them that I forgot I have no time to read them. So, they are now all in my bathroom and on my bedroom sidetable and I tell the kids I'll be back in 2 minutes, run up there, and read a little Deepak Chopra, shove down a few lines from Dr. Charlotte Kasl, squeeze in a few pages from the moderation management books - all in 5 minutes sprees. They are melding together in my mind and I feel a little numb -- I think it is all really just a big overwhelming 'how to fix my spirit' mixture in my head right now. Will pick just one to calmly meditate on this weekend...hopefully I will be allowed out of the bathroom to read!

Sorry for the long post today. Best luck to all making it through any Friday Night triggers :h.

[Yosemite Sam]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Seto;312337 wrote:

So, I have to be completely honest with you all and myself, otherwise there is no point to this. Tuesday night might have been a great turning point for me.

Why oh why do I want to be so self destructive. Wednesday morning was the worst in a long time, the guilt, the regret, the shame, oh I could go on but don't want to depress anyone.

I want to end this relationship with old AL once and for all. I am like a time bomb waiting to explode again if I have more drink. Has any of you been in the situation where you have done what I have done or anything similar or worse even?

lots of love to you all SetoXXX

Seto,

Yes I have been in that situation may times. For me what it took was
honestly looking at those terrible actions ( that are so against your reason ).
And getting angry with those actions ( not yourself as that does more damage)
and deciding that you are bigger than that carbon molecule Al. Remember those
actions every time you are tempted and how you allowed yourself to be
bullied by Al. Say I will beat this. The tests will come for sure and it is
my observation that the more cumulative tests that you can pass, the
easier and less frequent the tests will be. Love yourself enough, as we
all do, to not give in.

with love and understanding, Sam

[myra]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Oh the times I have dashed back to the store for more!! Would never be like a normal person who can keep wine on hand. those people amaze me. How in the hell do you keep "wine on hand" and not drink the whole lot?

Happy Friday to all. It is after lunch here and I am still in pj's getting a little work done here and there. Going to work shortly but just to pick up some stuff to do at home or either get organized for Monday.

You are right - Friday is just another day. Will pick up some AF wine.
Love you all.
Myra

[disapprovingcat]

ODAT - Sat....no FRIDAY!!

Hello to all and happy friday

announcement - 60 days AF today

whoop! one day at a time that's how. now what? I do not know. Continue AF or try to moderate?

The physical symptoms of withdrawal are long gone - but I won't soon forgot how utterly crappy I felt for the first couple of weeks. I am afraid of backsliding so even one is scary. Maybe I should wait until I am in a controlled environment...

h4o - I am drinking grapefruit juice this week - it's quite tart and "grownup"

Sam - you are right about the cumulative tests getting easier to get past

Gathings - this is a hot time, after the first couple of weeks you are absolutely feeling the high of your sobriety and your body is thanking you - stay with it!

Seto - You're ready to take this on. You know you want to and you have the support of your husband (and us). Try - there is no fail unless you don't try.



Bessie, Ripple, Mummy, Cindi, Rustop, caseaday, cowgal, LVT, Croft, Myra - have a wonderful weekend and best of luck with your goals.

:thanks: for your help