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    #1

    friends

    today was a rough day. one of my "friends" called trying to talk me into drinking. she kept saying things like. whats the big deal? you are an adult and not hurting anyone. WTH! not hurting anyone, nope just myself....
    i stood strong though and i feel great. who needs "friends" like that? i have really found out who matters in my life. the thing is, is that some dropped off completely. i think if they see me than they have to look at themselves. hmmm scary picture. anyone else experiencing this? i'm sure you are.
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    #2
    friends

    awesome .. great job on taking care of yourself . yes we all need friend . but not like that..peace and god bless
    :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
    best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

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      #3
      friends

      One of the first things I had to do was 'lose' the drinking associates. Often it can be real scary for our buddies when we quit - it gives them a wake up call plus they feel they are losing someone from the clique. They may turn it roun don you - make you feel bad. I had one of mine contacting me in rehab, started saying he had a problem too. I had to be harsh - told him I couldn't talk to him any more because of his drinking and if he had a problem he needed to sort it out himself.

      Fact is if your getting sober yourself you are not in a position to be around other drinkers. Surround yourself with positive people - stick with the winners.

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        #4
        friends

        one of my drinking buddys,, who l have been mates with for 20 years keeps trying to get me to drink
        he has no family here so l try to keep helping him as he drinks day and night everyday,,,, got him to docs last week there but him in rehab,, but at the weekend he tred to get me to drink,,,, wish l could walk away from him
        there is no shame in losing a fight,, only in winning

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          #5
          friends

          Findingme with friends like that who needs enemies. Well done on keeping strong and focused. It looks like your "friend" has the problem and is trying to find an excuse to drink themselves

          :goodjob: in refusing to be led astray

          :l Sweetpea xx
          :flower: Keep strong and focused things do get better and you will find your happy :h

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            #6
            friends

            I am afraid that's what it may come to. I had a boyfriend few years back who was alcoholic. I kept trying to stop and was seeking help for myself. He just kept buying beers and telling me I deserved to enjoy myself. I had enough and walked out on him. He went on a mega binge and was calling telling me he was vomiting blood (he suffered from ulcers probably as result of drinking), would I help him. I arranged an appointment with his GP and got in touch with the organisation I was seeing about my drink problem. They told me to walk away from him.

            I helped him find somewhere better to live but he ended up being a catalyst for more problems and eventually I just walked away. I had to involve the police in the end to stop the drunken abuse I received on the phone - much of it trying to get me to go round and help him. I knew it was so he could get me back drinking with him.

            Alcoholics have to help themselves in the first place.

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              #7
              friends

              It is tough to walk away from former drinking friends but it has to be done at least until you get a grip on yourself...and if they just do not 'get it' about why YOU want and need to stop...find new friends. Our 'abuser' inclination can make this tough to do. I finally realized that this is a personal journey and if I was to succeed I could not let others hold me back or drag me down.

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                #8
                friends

                thanks everyone! it helps to know this is the "norm" when it comes to drinking buddies. i live in a very small town with very little to do. bars are the biggest attraction. can anyone help with ideas on how to meet new people and where? i go to the gym daily, the library the park. i do not have children and most do. it is very difficult to meet women that are childless and have the ability to do something other than go to a bar for a few hours. and meeting men......omg, slim pickins!

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                  #9
                  friends

                  findingme!
                  Congratualations on staying strong and not getting back into the drinking with buddies habit. You are making some very strong statements about your desire to live a life that for you is better than it was. YOU ROCK!
                  "Friends" that want us to go drinking can be a real bad trigger. You have said in your posts that you want to find ways to meet new people, a clean break if you will from the past existance. Have you given any thought to volunteer work? If you check a the library, or in a local paper, they may have a "volunteer corner." Or check with the county offices, they often know of groups looking for volunteer workers. I know my wife and I do some volunteer work, and we have made some good non-drinking friends there through time. Best of luck to you and again,
                  CONGRATULATIONS!
                  Stay Strong!
                  BHOG
                  War isn't working. Let's try Peace!

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