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**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 01:39 PM

Awakening

Welcome! You have come to the right place. I found this site a couple of weeks ago after a very bad night of partying. I am 38 and have always been a little partier. Seemed to be fun when your young but not anymore. I don't drink every singel day but I certainly could . My days were usually Thurs. Sat. and social events. I would sometimes throw in the odd Sunday as well. I used it as my down time. It's too much isn't it. I'm a stay at home mom with one daughter whom I love to pieces. I need to experience life without wine for a while. I hope it works. There is a lot of great support in here and I find myselt checking the board quite a bit. Hang in there and make some new buddies.

TTFN

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 02:26 PM

Awakening

nomore - you hit the nail on the head. It's just not fun anymore. How did that happen. I am 41, mother of 3, big house in the 'burbs, great husband, etc. I am tired of this drinking albatross around my neck. Last weekend I stayed away from the wine and just drank beer. What a difference. It's so great to be able to remember everything from the night before.

Welcome, Not Powerless. You'll be amazed at how the people on here have the same problem you have. It's great support and just knowing that I'm not the "only one" really helps me to not feel like such a loser!

Jane.

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 02:27 PM

Awakening

Thanks for the encouraging words. I just printed the book and ordered the supplements. Here's to a road of less fuzziness!!

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 02:37 PM

Awakening

Welcome! You'll find so much encouragement here and I hope it's what you need to understand yourself and the reasons you drink.

I can so relate to the statement of "it's just not fun anymore." It seems to be more embarrassing than anything, and I hate not being in control of what I want to do rather than having something else control ME.

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 03:15 PM

Awakening

Embarrassing, mortifying and depressing. Especially when you can't remember putting your kids to bed or yourself for that matter. I just want to make the change before my kids get older and hopefully I won't keep the cycle going in my family. I hate waking up in the morning and trying to remember what happened the night before, what I said, what I said I'd do, how I acted etc. I even believed that I was functioning okay at work because I got there. Being tired and hung over all day is not what I call an effective worker.

Look forward to getting the supplies and chatting in the times to come.

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 03:52 PM

Awakening

Hi not powerless,
I agree it is the not remembering that makes us go red in the face, all those embarassed feelings, and no more you hit the nail on the head when you say it just isnt fun any more. I have always been a social butterfly, and the alcohol spurred it on and somehow my butterfly morphed into a great big ugly fire spitting grub! I get almost manic when I get a bottle of wine to myself and I would eyeball anyone who wanted to share grrrrrrr stay away from my bot bot. Its breaking the mind set, being able to either stop or moderate that is the key for me. I just want to get off that "have to have it" roller coaster and save my liver and a few pennies to boot.

You are in the right place, I got here just over a week ago and have found excellent support which motivates me to make the changes. You know you will feel better if you just stop for a while and give your body and mind a rest. I am taking supplements but not the ones on the site yet, I am in Australia and have found almost equivalents except for the kudzu. Going okay and last night purchased a bottle of "Billabong" de-alcoholised wine to try. Blech... it tasted like a Billabong that had gone feral. Best not to have anything and stick to the ginger beer (which by the way is quite satisfying, the low calorie version).

Your kids will thank you eventually and you will be a better Mummy because you will remember everything you say and do, and believe me at 44 years old I have probably lost a year of memory due to the plonk, the word waves are all out there floating around in the Universe waiting for me to catch my spaceship home.....

Keep talking and talking and talking and stay with us. Jools

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 04:30 PM

Awakening

I am really looking forward to kicking this in gear full throttle. My kids need me and one of them has been diagnosed as having autism recently so I really need to be on the ball. I just get that heart racing feeling when everyone wants something from me at the exact same time and the wine just seems to settle me down enough to get it all done. However I can't stop at one or two glasses...no I just keep going. Thank god nothing has ever happened to them while I've been drinking or I would never forgive myself and I think that's what motivated me.
Thanks all
Courtney

Hey I love Australia...I have family over there and they are great. I live in the states and haven't been there in about 5 years. Hope to get back.

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 06:10 PM

Awakening

I think I have a similar problem.
A sweet enabling husband.
But, he does make me buy my own beer and wine and scotch most of the time.
Which is embarassing to be showing up daily at the store to purchase. That was the only way I could keep myself half sane.
I never could 'stock-up' once or twice a week or I would feel obligated to polish it off quicker.
I did get some kudze and clams forte to OD on tonight.
Yesterday was dry and I had a hard time sleeping.
I ordered the CD's and starter kit and topax this morning.
Can't wait to get started.

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 06:14 PM

Awakening

And another thing.
Can you imagine beening pasted out and a fire, flood, tornate happened?
For those of you with kids that's something to think about.
I shutter to not remember all the nights I passed out cold.
It is amazing I am awake!

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 06:36 PM

Awakening

In addition to "it's just not fun anymore" I'll add "it doesn't taste as good or make me feel as warm and fuzzy."

I want the days of warm and fuzzy and a little social loosening and laughter. Somewhere along the 4-5 glasses of Chardonnay per night, that all got lost and replaced with the not remembering (which drives me nuts just like you all mentioned), morning headaches, and daily thoughts of "Is it 4 O Clock yet?"

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 07:05 PM

Awakening

Hi Not Powerless and everyone,

I am a Mum of 3 young children, age 43 and I to, have decided enough is enough.

I don't want my children seeing Mummy and Daddy drinking and drinking and thinking that that is the norm. Since starting the program I had a fantastic first week and a half, a rocky 3/4 days, then have had another great couple of days, fired with even more enthusiasm and even less desire to drink (again ditto feelings with you guys, no fun anymore, etc). My husband and I drank wine (him wine and beer) as freely as if we were on a permanent holiday (we are migrants to Australia from UK). The wine is cheap here and the sun shines, barbies always fired up and it was a blast. Now, 9 years down the line we're kind of thinking we should go "home" from this holiday and settle down! So, we are really happy with this program, it definately does curb desire for alcohol, physically anyway, it's the mental, social habit for me that needs attention! But in the 2 and a half weeks I've been doing this, sheesh! my alcohol level has gone from - oh my god, I'm going to have to work this out and face it - probably about 8 or 9 litres of wine a week to, in total over the last 17 days to 2 litres!!!! And even at that, I feel as if I could have done without most of it.

My old pattern was shocking when I think back! I used to pick the kids up from school, argue with myself why I shouldn't go into the bottle shop, agree not to, then of course find myself parked outside the bottle shop. Nip in, grab a 4 litre cask of Chardonnay (because it was more "economical"), back home, tell myself I wasn't going to have any till hubby got home. 4.30 pm, open cask, just to taste it, then by the time hubby got home at 6.30, I had had about 3 or 4 glasses of wine while feeding children, dealing with their wants and disputes! Then we would sit down to have a glass of wine! I wouldn't get our meal on the go until around 8pm. Bed by 11pm. Wake up at 2am, wide awake, feeling sick and headachey - vowing never again. Next day repeat. It was just really a case of getting through the days (hungover), fullfilling all duties (as best I could), waiting for the highlight of the day (sitting down to wine). Weekends were just well, 2 'o' clock was wine 'o' clock, sitting outside drinking while the kids played about. I didn't get blind drunk all the time mostly just tired and ratty. Mind you, I have a few stories I could tell involving parties and neighbours that I am still trying to live down, that will keep for another day! I decided that my life is too good to waste like that. I live in a really lovely place, have a wonderful husband, fantastic children and have so much more I want to do with my time than have it stolen by a cask of Chardonnay.

Another thing that I have just remembered. I was getting a really beetroot red face whenever I drank. A blotchy rash would also appear on my neck and chest. Isn't that scary? Obviously my body was telling me something and as this went on for a while, I was just ignoring it. I don't know if it was a blood pressure thing or what. But, there you go, at the time a little old thing like a heart attack wasn't going to stop me from glugging the old vino.

So I for one can say thank God THIS PROGRAM WORKS

**Guest** · April 4, 2006, 07:53 PM

Awakening

Does anyone know if getting out of control during middle age women is common?
After reading the posts it seems like most of us are 35-50.
Does something happen to our hormone balance and turn to self medication for help and then we don't know when stop ....daily?
Anyway, I am going to start a new subject while I adjust to another beerless, wineless and scotchless night.
Look for 'Reasons to Quit Don't Outnumber all the Reasons Why' and why that is a lie.

**Guest** · April 7, 2006, 07:33 AM

Awakening

Wow

I'm on day 3 now and have been reading the boards for a while. If I ever had a question as to whether I needed to be her, its been answered! Are you guys all living my life?? Nearly every post I read I can say, "I did that or I know that feeling." Sorry to say it, but I am glad there are others who have been suffering like me! I'm happy to FINALLY be here. Ah, relief!!

**Guest** · April 7, 2006, 09:25 AM

Awakening

Re: Wow

Relief is the word! When I found this site in December, I had the feeling of coming home, even though I had never seen this home, never heard of this home, and had never met these family members. But this MWO family has become my family, my friends, my support system. I'm a pretty open person (yeah, duh, like you guys hadn't figured that out!

), have told family and friends that I drink too much, but the amount of support and true understanding that I have gotten here is so awesome! I am so grateful. Grateful to all of you and to RJ, earthmother, leader and partner in our journey into health! What a trip! Beats some of the other *trips* I've taken!:lol

Love, Kathy

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