attn health care professionals -come one come all!

[Guest]

i started posting yesterday. in reading many posts i also found a psychotherapist, mental health care prof as I am. it felt so good to hear of others - and to also hear that this does no diminish our capacity to help. yes, everyone i know would be shocked - my reason for 'cutting back and retreating' more is "an illness" - which is not a total lie. hence this is why i mad ethe 2 posts of "helping everyone but myself" and the "thank you post" (I still do not know how to respond on this internet stuff - but am learning. mental health professionals, all of those in the helping capacity are just human and need a place to speak openly about who we are and what we do without judgement.
i thank the courageous Kathy for doing this - she opened a door for me OUT of my isolation. thank you. if you wnat to read my story it is called "thank you and I don't know how to reply". any other health care peole PLEASE speak out - DO NOT keep it a secret anymore - the relief you will feel just to tell SOMEONE is magical. today - I DID NOT WANT A DRINK at all - and I did not drink in the morning...even though i had no appointments. this site is a God send. Elle

[Guest]

attn health care professionals -come one come all!

Wow, Elle,

I'm really awed that my old post made a difference for you! Yeah, I've done my share of drinking in the morning, my to my horror, when I haven't had appointments until the afternoon. Mostly I haven't cancelled appointments, couldn't really afford to, but have been really angry at myself in the afternoon, when after a glass or two of wine in the am, have definitely not been 100% there for my clients!

This program is miraculous in many ways, and the support on this site is terrific. As I am learning (the hard way, as I always seem to have to ), like therapy, it's still a lot of hard work. I'm climbing back on the wagon after a period of hectic busyness where I wasn't able (and didn't insist on making the time for) all aspects of the program, and it cost me in my sobriety and self respect. But it's good to be back on regularly, and espec. to find some really neat newbies, including you, Elle. Welcome on board! Hope that you'll be posting often! And keep up the good work!

Kathy

[Guest]

attn health care professionals -come one come all!

Hi Elle!
I am also a health care professional. I am in rehab and do home care therapy. Oh, how I dreaded the mornings I would wake up feeling much less than 100% to say the least, then have to go to a patient's home and enthusiastically run them through a series of exercises and encouragement!. I am doing my job much better this week! My paperwork is even on time!!!
I have a secret. About 4 yrs ago, I worked at an outpatient clinic doing hand therappy. I was so hungover while I was treating one patient, that I had to leave in the middle of the session to go to the bathroom and... bla. you know. Went right back to business with no one the wiser. Except for you all now! Never want to go back to that! That was when my drinking was at it's worst. Ever since, the "problem/addiction" whatever (I still have yet to name it) IT has been just been hanging around, rearing it's ugly face again and again. It looks like this0] . I guess I'll get to know it and hopefully conquer it!
With this program going full blast for me (6 days now), so far so good.
Well, OFF TO HELP OTHERS!!!! Have a great day everyone!
Good luck Elle!
Becca

[Guest]

attn health care professionals -come one come all!

Hi Becca;

You crack me up0] is that really how ugly my friend Heinken Looks! Wow0] 0] ..Good thing I haven't seen Heiny since Jan. 13th, I can only imagine that Heiny looks real scary now!

Hugs,
Brandy

Good Luck Elle!

[Guest]

attn health care professionals -come one come all!

Hi all,

Most of you know that I am an RN, and I can so relate to the guilt of not feeling 100% there for my patients. I dread mornings that I work after drinking, knowing I have to put in a 13 hour day in such terrible shape. When i don't drink the night before, I feel like "super nurse"...the nurse I want to be... really caring and LISTENING to them....not to myself. Becca, I had a similar experience in Dec '04. The night before work, I got really drunk...threatened to leave my hubby, everything. Packed up my Beetle with ALL my life possessions. I guess i changed my mind or passed out. I woke up in the am, went to my dresser to get my uniform....where the F are all my clothes???? Started having flash backs of the night before...had to quietly unpack everything and go to work....spent much time in the restroom, crying and puking. Terrible!! Since, I have made a concerted effort not too drink much the night before work to avoid a situation like that one. Got called off today for at least the 1st 4 hrs, so be hangin out here a lot. Take care of YOURSELVES all!!!!!! Love, Gina

[Guest]

attn health care professionals -come one come all!

Thank you health care professionals!

I have to say if anyone has been reading any of my posts lately...I just went to a therapist just the other day and it is helping me with my green headed monster
0]
and all those other :evil
and these boards are helping me to moderate
thanks
BW

[Guest]

attn health care professionals -come one come all!

Good Morning All: Thank you for your responses, the time you take to write and be supportive. I hope I can be this also. Today has been a busy day and I find myself - since the mere contact of this sight - finding a strength - in recognition that I am not alone. My work is very isolating and so are my living circumstances at times.
I know - not THINK - that being in health care can often be isolating and even when not working one on one each day, even friends can tap you "dry" (not the kind of DRY I am looking for!) for advice and help and opinions: if it happens to be what they don't want to hear (different from a client relationship) it just creates problem(s). I have such a genuine yearning to sit and talk and visit with others and laugh or cry on an even level... so I isolate myself more and don't talk to anyone anymore. It never helps if you are attractive, and accomplished where women friends are concerned (I know that sounds terrible). The imagined competition - that doesn't exist in my mind and I sincerely do not understand, - does not feel supportive and loving. Anyway - I just needed to say that because I feel like I can here, in this venue. Beginning to drink has helped me with that isolation to feel good. There are other circumstances as in living rurally, being alone a lot. I have totally withdrawn when I am not working. I have even determined I don't want to work anymore in this field. I know I have a lot of work to do on myself - on the POSITIVE side see this as an oportunity for growth and change. My sobs are to be heard on a HEART and SOUL level: not an intellectual or strategic level: I believe that has to be part of the strategic solution - first and foremost. (here I go!......) Thanks for your honesty, being here and providing this space. With Love and Blessings to all who hurt. E