dealing with feelings again

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Jane,

My thing is BEER! I do know that once I start this program I will NEVER be able to drink it again....So, I am scared to death! I have the Cd's, Supps. The All One and Topa are still to arrive! So I am waiting .. For me it does have to be all or nothing, I know how my mind works! I would like, someday, to be able to have a glass of wine with my hubby. But that will be 6 months at least out. Never beer again or I would fall. (once I start that is my goal...and this time for me (ttfme) I will make it) Granted I haven't start except for the book and CD's. (my husband loves to fall asleep to the "sleep cd", I can't sleep, he sleeps like a baby..lol..Granted I have only done the "sleep" and "clearing" CD's. I will start everthing..when all "ducks are in a row"

Thanks and hagn,
Tammie

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Brandy, Can't we all just go on a retreat for a year??? Your complaints sound so much like mine!! Looking forward to working the next few days to escape. Glad I'm not the only sensitive one!! Gina ps: I must say the gym gives me temporary relief

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Ok Tammie - I'll drink your beer, you drink my wine! I'm on a mission tomorrow to hopefully get all the supps. You know, I used to think I passed out everynight on the couch because of the wine but here it is 9:30 p.m. and I am BEAT. This staying sober is tiring.

I'll check in with everyone tomorrow. Have a good one.


Jane.|I

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

hang in there

Hi All!

I'm sorry that you're all struggling! Hang in there! Yell, scream, cry, sit on the pity pot if you need to. Brandy, are you going to try topa? I know you have probably said what you are doing in other posts, but my nickname for myself is "strainer brain", so forgive me for not remembering. For those of you who are going to use topa, I think it will really help a lot. I've been getting a lot of comments on how much more even tempered I seem as I've dosed up, and I FEEL a lot more even tempered, even without drinking. I was very tired the first week I didn't drink, but that is easing up now, and even though I'm up to 175 mg. topa, I'm feeling more energy and getting more productive. It feels good. I'm getting more accomplished than I have in a long time. I was too boozed out of it to get much done other than go to work before.

Quitting is really hard, and even after your physical withdrawal (even if it is subtle) eases, the psychological withdrawal goes on and on. It's like losing a relationship, and we know that takes some getting over, even if it's been a bad relationship! I really miss the habit of drinking, although the topa makes it so much easier not to drink.

At home, I get to be alone more than I would like, but I do notice that, at work, I feel some impatience with my clients sometimes and wish I was elsewhere! Poor clients! That is passing, though.

Anyway, keep on hanging in there! We're all gonna make it!

Hugs,
Kathy

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Gina;

Say the word! I got laid of 6/05, I'm currently looking for another job...But, check this out..the job I'll get will be only for a few weeks to make some money..I take my Board Exam probably some time in Feb..After my board exams I will be back working in a Hospital in a clinical setting instead of working with Administration, like my old position.

Anyway, not drinking has put money back in my pocket..I can save, save and save...Say when...My husband has friends from Brooklyn that we are close friends with, they keep talking about us coming to the West coast..Be a real strong trip, if I socialized with my friends in recovery, while he did his thing!! Anything is possible...

I am not interested in starting any meds and I take multi Vitamins everyday...My mood is not as bad as often, but still up and down...Dec. 20th last beer, my B'day 1/9 3 glasses of champange, why am I not past all the B.S. that goes along with recovery?

Hugs!
Brandy

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Brandy...

I just misread your last post as - "I got laid.... of 6/05". Gee I thought, we are really sharing personal stuff these days here in the forum. ha ha.

Mish

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Brandy

Hey Brandy,
Let me know when you are coming out this way. It'd be great to get together if you are in the Orange County,LA, or even San Diego area. What kind of BS are you having with your recovery? TTYS! Gina PS: Why aren't you interested in any meds...just curious.

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Hi Tammie;

Thanks for the support! Today is the 16th and I feel like crap again..Holiday today, everybody is at home..

Not feeling like drinking, instead I feel like I hate the WORLD.

Brandy

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Mish;

Thanks for calling that to my attention:, I meant to post laid off.

LOL

Brandy

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Brandy,

That's the way I was feeling yesturday! Only I started crying and couldn't stop. It passes, lol...I am sure yours will to.

Read a good book, go play something silly with the kids (even if they are the ones driving you nuts) it seems to help for me.
Hang in there and just try to laugh at something; laughing helps alot.

Hope you day gets better,
Tammie

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Re: Brandy

Hey Gina;

I think the main thing that isn't helping is having to clear up blood work that my doctor didn't order during my physical in June. School won't clear my physical for my internship registration until...Going to the lab this week, for followup.

I have a wonderful 13 yr old and loving hubby, but inside I feel like I'm falling apart at least every other few days. I am not interested in taking anything other than my regular vitamins until my internship is completed..

My turning 44 last week went pretty good, but now nothing to look foreward to..Job hunting sucks, to look for a job just until I pass my boards and go back into a hospital setting isn't making me feel any better. I wake up in the middle of night and can't get back to sleep...

Just women stuff I guess...

Thanks for letting me vent!

Brandy

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Re: Brandy

Hey there Brandy,
Isn't all that "woman stuff fun? ... NOT! I just turned 45 in Aug., So far I'd say the "40's" are over -rated! I wake up almost every night btween 3 & 4 AM, & can't get back to sleep. I usually find some dull movie to try & nod off to. But I've been hearing about some good books on these boards, so I'm gonna arm myself w/some of them, soon as I cash my check. Hang in there, & so will I. Hugs Judie

[Guest]

dealing with feelings again

Re: Brandy

Judie;

Thanks for the smile! I think mentally I'm settled for the night, maybe sleeping all night will help regulate my mood..

Brandy