Can you do it for someone else?

[4tops]

Can you do it for someone else?

Why am/was I not concerned? Because I'm sticking my head in the sand. I'm telling myself, this is a "season", stress with young children, homeschooling, etc. and THEN I'll back off. I know that sounds about as smart as saying I'm taking a viper to bed with me. I just wouldn't admit the danger until yesterday. I'm trying to process all of this now, and am somewhat amazed at how much I'm thinking about the wine, knowing I'm not going to have any. I don't want to be that way, I will not let my family fall to pieces because of this. At this point, we are all in tact, and healthy (I have to stop drinking or this amount, what I mean is our relationships with the kids, and being honest as spouses). My husband said yesterday he felt as if an atomic bomb was hanging over our heads, and if it drops, it will be irreversible. I think he is right, I'm just trying to come to terms with it.

[Accountable for Me]

Can you do it for someone else?

You sound much more positive and honest with yourself today!

Once you get use to living without the wine; you will realize that life is actually more enjoyable and rewarding. It took me a loooong time to acknowledge this. But it is truly much more enjoyable without being sedated every night.

I like what your husband said about it being an 'atomic bomb' hanging over. I think he pretty much summed it up for a lot of us here. Nothing good comes from nightly drinking, really. Your body grows tolerant so your consumption increases. If it isn't the stress of kids, homeschooling, and doing all that needs to be done around the house; it will be something else eventually.

I am assuming you did not drink last night? If that is the case; congrats on your first day AF!

[KBCE]

Can you do it for someone else?

4tops;360381 wrote: Why am/was I not concerned? Because I'm sticking my head in the sand. I'm telling myself, this is a "season", stress with young children, homeschooling, etc. and THEN I'll back off. I know that sounds about as smart as saying I'm taking a viper to bed with me. I just wouldn't admit the danger until yesterday. I'm trying to process all of this now, and am somewhat amazed at how much I'm thinking about the wine, knowing I'm not going to have any. I don't want to be that way, I will not let my family fall to pieces because of this. At this point, we are all in tact, and healthy (I have to stop drinking or this amount, what I mean is our relationships with the kids, and being honest as spouses). My husband said yesterday he felt as if an atomic bomb was hanging over our heads, and if it drops, it will be irreversible. I think he is right, I'm just trying to come to terms with it.

4tops you are a very smart woman. I can actually hear the realization happening throughout your posts. This is what has been happening to me over the last few weeks. Granted after eing AF, I slipped and I have cut back to 1-2 glasses some nights, but I strive to be AF. I KNOW what I should do, it's ME jst not doing it like a big ass. This is one hard hell of a journey. I was very angry at myself after the 2 week AF (then the 4th of July holiday hit...eeek) I realized how much better I felt and how clear everything was. I want that again, and I am sure you do to. As do your husband and your wonderful kids. We can do this. I can tell you are strong, so have faith in yourself. You are not depriving yourself, you are doing something WONDERFUL for yourself! ODAT is my mantra. :goodjob:

[louise]

Can you do it for someone else?

I'm very glad to hear you are no longer sticking your head in the sand. Especially since with a 1 year old the stress and excuse of children will be there for enough years to get you into a place you do not want to go. Welcome, we are here to support you. You are lucky. You probably will not have any serious physical symptoms and will only have to do battle with your mind. Get the book and best wishes on your journey. Really, you are going to feel sooooooooo much better in a bit.

[DeeBee]

Can you do it for someone else?

Funny how I have forgotten so much about when AL ruled my life - well not so funny... but it is slowly coming back to me in drips and drabs.

My husband gave me quite a few ultimatimes and they were always the morning after benders and they left my blood running cold. Eventually they got through to me that he did it out of love and not because he wanted to "change me" or take away my "freedom". I'm not saying that our stories are the same, I just wanted to share a bit of my story with you. I hope that your days are getting easier... keep posting, there are a lot of people here that care about you!

[KBCE]

Can you do it for someone else?

DeeBee;360418 wrote: Eventually they got through to me that he did it out of love and not because he wanted to "change me" or take away my "freedom".

Very true! It is so easy to become defensive about AL. My husband has never said anything to me (I am a good hider) but if he had (beore I came here) I think I would have been very angry and snotty about it...

Kat