little by little by little.....

[Bandit]

little by little by little.....

Hi Maggymay,
Sorry to hear that last night was a bit tough for you. Can't exactly say that I had a good night myself. I'm afraid I have to agree with what Dolphin has said.
:h
Bandit

[maggymay]

little by little by little.....

thanks dolphin a nd bandit. martyr is not the word. i find myself backing off from it and know that i want more than just listening to his problems with one or other of them. i had a chat with my gbf yesterday and he says i need to just take it easy and leave him at it. anyway i have more presssing troubles today than that. I think Saturday was bad - kind of dipped in my humour and got emotional and had too much to drink yesterday. i think i better do new thread on it....

xxx

[maggymay]

little by little by little.....

vera b - you were right it does creep up on you and it did on me yesterday. might have little think and do a new thread on what is going on. xx

[vera-b]

little by little by little.....

Dear Maggy,

Just saw this thread, and will tell hubby dinner will be late. Have to respond. I'm 54 (knew we had to be close in age!) but am still happily married (almost 27 years), so I have not been in your shoes. I cannot imagine how lonely it must be to reach the age when you're essentially done with the day-to-day Mother deal, have achieved in your career, but the personal love life and companionship is tenuous. Now, my wiser friends would say that this is precisely the time in life to invest in the best you. The healthiest, the happiest, you that could ever be.

It seems you have a lot invested in this man - he even gets to give you the heads up when you can visit him sans "children." Does he drive? Can he visit you? Does he CARE ENOUGH/LOVE YOU ENOUGH to make sacrifices in his life FOR YOU???? If you catch my common thread, it's the YOU. You are Maggymay, and you are awesome. Must go for now - want to hear what you're up to. I just may have to come to Ireland. . .

V.

[vera-b]

little by little by little.....

Hi Maggy,

Dinner is over and wanted to touch base before bedtime. Relationships sure can get complicated can't they?? You are such a catch. You are obviously a fabulous cook, intelligent and accomplished (law practice, whoooo) and have a loving relationship with your adult children. And your children are independent. That speaks volumes. Here they're referred to as boomerang kids - never quite leave the nest as Mom and/or Dad and/or child cannot quite let go. Your beau should be shining your boots! I can understand he may be a bit of a commitment-phobe given his experience the first time around, but it's distressing to hear his kids rule the roost.

If a good chardonnay would make him turn around, I'd toast it with you. But we know the answer. My sincerest hope is an echo of my post above. It's all about you, Mags. He has no clue how really wonderful you are. Take care.

V.

[maggymay]

little by little by little.....

wow....

Hi Vera B,

You have summed it up my dear. I have a very good gay friend who means the world to me and the only thing missing from my relationship with him is sex. He has even offered to try that if it is what I want but I have declined his kind offer. I just got so involved with this guy - and he is really a very good person - but I think I am way ahead of him in life if you know what I mean. He does come to see me as much as he can but I find the changeover from one life to another too much sometimes. I am quite eclectic in my life and love going with the flow and he is just stuck in the day to day routine of running his house. I think he would die without the children.

I dont know what I want really. I want him around and dont want the baggage - which essentially what we are talking about. You are right too about his marriage being awful. You see I am way past that stuff and can talk to my ex without any difficulty. I had a bad time at the weekend but bought Alan Carr's book yesterday and read it all night.

I think I think too much as well. By the way a client yesterday thought I would be a great psychiatrist! Right.......

Thanks again for the contact. I really appreciate it. xxx