Excited about Change

[ThuzzyQ]

Okay, I've been hanging around here off and on for about 2 years and have tried to moderate with all good intentions but a few weeks ago I realized that I need lots and lots of AF time and its not going to happen with me by Mods. So, thanks to reading all the threads I went to my doctor and got a prescription for Anabuse, and to my surprise, this doc was so cool about it.

I'm excited to use it as crazy as that sounds cause I really do want to give up this shit that has controlled my life for longer than I care to think. I don't want to wake up and my teenage daughters don't want me around cause I can't stay off the bottle long enough to spend quality sober time with them and frankly that's what's happening with my older child. Thank God I do believe that it won't take long to mend the fence with her as long as the I am AF.

Anabuse is mostly a mental thing for me but someone here wrote once that no matter what you can't drink, no matter WHAT. Well that what in the past was all the excuses we have all used bad day, good day, tomorrow, the weekend - shoot I have used them all so now I'm going to lock the liquor store door for myself.

Anyway, thanks for listening, I start tomorrow morning with the anabuse, but no AL tonight anway cause I have to work job #2. Now my only concern is all my drinking buddies will wonder what the hell is up with me!

I'll let you know what I think of the anabuse and how its going!

Good luck to everyone and their personal goals here at MWO!

[universal]

Excited about Change

Good for you on taking this step! You sound very positive and are making the changes for yourself. That is the best way to start!

Good luck and keep us posted on your progress!

Love and Hugs,
Uni

[AAthlete]

Excited about Change

Best of luck ThuzzyQ.

Isn't it wonderful to have something positive to look forward to instead of something negative (fighting the urge to drink)?

[Guest]

Excited about Change

Good for you! Love the positive attitude!

[Guest]

Excited about Change

Just either avoid your drinking buddies - if they drink heavily you will probably find AF you have nothing in common with them, or tell them you are quitting. Latter option will either result in support (if they have nothing to deny themselves), or criticism (which usually shows fear or jealousy).

Either way it has to be done.

[time2change]

Excited about Change

Good Luck.
I think you have made a great decision. Do whatever it takes to stop drinking. I think you will be very happy you took this step. Let us know how you are doing.

[vera-b]

Excited about Change

Way to take charge Thuzzy!

The issue of the drinking buddies is an interesting dilemma. We all have to live in a world where booze is all around us, and some have to vanquish it from their personal space in order to survive. Some keep no booze in the house, whereas others keep minimal amounts if they're modders. We do the same with our friends. Some folks here can only hang with their totally sober friends, many of whom they meet at fellowship places like AA. Others find their friends don't really notice so much and it's not a big deal. If those friends are going to give you a hard time about not drinking, I'd find some new friends. Your sobriety is that important.

Totally understand the mental fatigue. We're all tired of the mental tug of war that constantly takes place. Time to put our heads in a whole new place! Good luck with the antabuse.

V.

[aplgrl]

Excited about Change

Good for you Thuzzy! I am new to antabuse as well and while I admit I am not out of the woods, I have found it easy to say no to numerous invitations for cocktails. For me in the past waking in the morning and swearing off alcohol for the day, week, month, life was easy... As the day progressed? Well, we all know too well the bewitching hour! I take my antabuse when I awake from a sober night and have no desire to drink that day. Later in the day my options are limited to drink and get sick, or do not drink... The bewitching hour still callls, but in the distance. I wish you success and look forward to your progress.

[KateH1]

Excited about Change

Way to go Thuzzy! Do what it takes! If "Modding" was about good intentions, we would all be doing it! You will love your newly found freedom of being AF!

Good Luck!
Kate

[jessie]

Excited about Change

Hi Thuzzy, my big breakthrough came when I started to admit to those around me that I am alcoholic. In the meantime, just tell them that you are on medications and cannot take alcohol.
All the best.
Jessie.

[ThuzzyQ]

Excited about Change

Just an update, its been three days of AB and I feel great! It was tough the witching hour but knowing there is no way in hell I could have a drink got me through it along with some fun foods and NA drinks.

I think that it was my "bottom" and I'm finally going to crawl back up to the top but I hope there is some skipping along the way and its going to be some struggling but with this website and my AB I feel great!

[KateH1]

Excited about Change

Thuzzy, I am so happy for you!! Yep, there is definitely some skipping along the way!! Struggles too...but, the good thing about the struggles is that each time we push through them, we are learning and getting stronger!! Keep up the good work!! It is so well worth it!!

xx Kate

[ThuzzyQ]

Excited about Change

Just for an update I'm on day 10 with my Antabuse - no side effects at all - of course I have no intention of "testing" it either. I feel great! I have slept a lot and allowed myself to because I believe I'm recharging from years of daily drinking.

If anyone out there has tried EVERYTHING and still unfortantely stumbled back to the bottle, may I recommend trying the AB. It is very psychological for me but obviously physically too. For me, as long as I KNOW i cannot drink, the obsession seems to have lifted for most of the days and nights. I made it through one weekend, I think those are the toughest right now but I'm planning things to keep me busy.

I'm also amazed at the circle of people I kept around me - all drinkers needless to say or at least didn't judge my drinking (except my children).

The kids are happy and I'm thrilled and I will keep taking this until I can do it myself and if I can't, I'll just keep taking it till I can. My GP is so supportive and very educated about how to help which is huge, I have struggled with other doctors, both psychiatrists, psychologists, etc. All hesitate to give you a damn thing to help with your drinking - I wonder if they hesitate to give insulin to a diabetic? Some things were very frustrating but I'm so gratefull I kept trying.

Sorry to ramble, just so damn happy to finally be here sober! Stick with this site and all the ideas people have and all it takes is ONE to click for you and you can start a sober or moderating life!

[Doggygirl]

Excited about Change

Congratulations Thuzzy!! I'm beginning to think that part of this process, for most of us, is some real hard struggle time before we FINALLY do whatever is necessary to STOP THE MADNESS. You sound wonderful and I'm happy for you!!

DG
Day 70 Alcohol & Hangover Free