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    Partner wants to start on topamax too...

    Hi Kath,

    Thank you so much for your reply (also via ez-mail, I appreciate it). It feels like everybody else has already given up on me on these boards, but than again that could be paranoia caused by the guilt of acting foolishly when intoxicated.
    Have promised myself not to post on these boards after I have had a drink though, as I really feel I could get much needed support and advice here and importantly contribute some too.

    Anyways am over it. I have got a question for you all; Is anybody doing the program (topa-vita-exercise-etc) with their partner?
    The reason I ask is that my partner, after waking up this morning after yet another christmas function/lunch which resulted in a massive binge and return home at 2.00 a.m. as opposed to the promised time of 8.00 p.m., declared that he will also start on this program.

    Is he kidding himself, am I kidding myself for being hopeful?

    I have to explain, though, that his drinking patterns are not (almost) daily like mine, but that he has terrible problems at trying to drink moderately ones to twice a week. Consequently, if he is at home (as he travels a lot for work, 3 weeks out of 4 these days not including the weekends) I will participate in the drinking sessions and my total alcohol intake increases enormously.
    It is like we edge eachother on almost.

    Overall we have a great relationship, I think of him as my soul-mate and life-partner and he thinks the same of me.
    He has also supported me in the past when I have tried new medication and/or counciling by cutting out drinking completely. He seems to be able to that quite easily for a few weeks until he gets a bad urge to really trash himself. Ofcourse our relationship is ten-fold better without the booze and we both realise that our communication suffers from the alcohol abuse.
    That in mind, would that be enough for us to do this together or is it better to just focus on me and my alcohol problems so as not to (possible) be dragged down?

    Any advice is appreciated!

    Indy

    PS: Kath, I will get my liver tested before commencing on the topamax in January.....makes perfectly sense to me to do that.

    #2
    Partner wants to start on topamax too...

    Indy - Hi again

    Nobody has given up on you, I'm sure. I certainly haven't. Sometimes anybody reading your post may not have an answer for you. And I haven't noticed any foolishness in your postings that I have read - nor in your communcation with myself through EZ.

    It's wonderful that your partner has even thought about commencing the program, let alone declaring that he will. It would be terrific support for you both. My ex-husband wanted to attend weight watchers, so I went along with him, and we lost 14 and 12kg respectively by supporting each other. If either of us had tried it alone, it would have been harder.

    Saying that, you need to commit to this by yourself, for yourself and not get involved in the drinking sessions if you want to succeed. Great if your partner gets on the program, but don't let him sway you away from it if he fails.

    He sounds like a great partner and won't want to drag you down. You do it for yourself, Indy and what a bonus if your partner can do it for himself as well.

    Wish you all the best
    Kath

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