Frustration

[Guest]

I was so excited about this program, but I have been hitting a brick wall trying to get Topamax thru my Dr. Her concern was the high dose, and how it may react with the supplements, which she felt could be dangerous being they are not FDA approved. I than sought out a holisitic provider who did not approve of pharmacuticals and referred me to a mental health provider! I can not keep trying different doctors because we no longer have insurance, and my husband is out of work so this is all out of pocket expense. Can anyone give me info on who to go through online with an offshore pharmacy? Should I start the program without Topamax? Any suggestions are welcome!

[Guest]

Frustration

Hi

Is your goal moderation or abstinence? I think the program can help you if you are committed to the entire regimen and are ready to quit. You need to ask yourself if you can do it. The supplements do help with the cravings. It doesn't help that the dr's are giving you a hard time. I didn't go to my primary care doc because I was worried she wouldn't prescribe it, and I went to a psychiatrist. I think others have went to psychiatrists as well. That makes things pretty rough to go to dr's and admit to a problem and have them tell you no. If you don't have insurance, topamax is still pretty expensive. If you want to buy overseas, the best bet is www.drugdelivery.ca. Most of us go to dr's now who know that we need to stay on this long term. If you are going to do it without medication, I really think individual counseling or support groups like AA are needed. Others might disagree with me, but it's hard to break the cycle. Anyone, welcome, and know that we all are struggling along together..

[Guest]

Frustration

Re: Hi

If you register, send me a message to my inbox and I can share a few things with you, OK? Thanks.

[Guest]

Frustration

Re: Hi

Hi Jenram,
Thanks for your response, I should be registered now, but I'm not quite sure it works, so I'm just testing

[Guest]

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Re: Hi

I don't hear many people talk about the cd's which really suprises me. For me (and I'm past my 12th week now) they have been the biggest help. I think all aspects of the program are wonderful and work together very well as described in the book. But I definately feel that the hynotic cd's helped me so much. Worth every penny I spent!
Good luck.
dmc

[Guest]

Frustration

Sending messages

Hi Jenram,
I would love to hear any advice. I would like to drink moderately, and I hope it will work for me. It feels so good to feel hopeful about my problem, and that I could possibly be a moderate drinker, and really taste and enjoy one glass of wine instead of the whole bottle. I'm waiting on the cd's and kudzu. =

[Guest]

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Re: Sending messages

Hi Laura

Did you get the email I sent to your inbox?

Good luck..

Jen

[Guest]

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Re: Sending messages

Hi Jen
I haven't been able to access my inbox. Feel free to email me if you don't mind at laurajk9@aol.com
thanks!
Laura

[Guest]

Frustration

program without topa

Laura
My dr's appt was cancelled and is now rescheduled for mid-Nov. However, after reading the book and reading all the comments on this discussion board, I was ready to get going. Plus my husband decided to try to quit, so I figured I would support the effort. That was 2 weeks ago. I started the supplements, tapes and continued my exercise program. No topa. My goal is moderation (I used to drink 1 bottle of wine /night, more if I started earlier in the afternoon.) It hasn't been easy, but I was 9 days without wine. Last night, I made a conscious decision to have 1 glass. I'm thrilled to say that it worked. I sipped (a hypnotic suggestion) and tasted every sip. My glass lasted several hours and I followed it with a cup of herbal tea.
Having shared this little success, I need to tell you that I am definitely not "there". I do not want to slip into the drinking every night pattern. And I think it will be hard not to have another glass tonight, but I am determined. Without Topa, I still have the desire and the craving, but I think the tapes and the supplements and especially the encouragement of all the 'board contributors' give me the power to say 'not at this time'. I find that if I can get to 8 pm without a glass of wine, I can make it the rest of the night.

Would this be easier with topa? probably. Can it be done without? I'm trying and so far I am making it. Will I ask my Dr. for a script when I go? I think I will. I will at least bringup the topic and hopefully open her mind to the possibility of prescribing it in the future.

Jen had a long comment on another topic where she was "devil's advocate" and suggested that even after the 12 weeks, we will never be able to take out drinking/sobriety for granted. I think she was wondering if moderation was really a possibility. It was very good 'food for thought' and I for one agree that I will ALWAYS have to watch my drinking---I will always have a problem. I just hope that over time, if I continue this way and remain ever vigilant, that I can actually 'forget about wanting a drink' on a daily basis. Time and with the help of God and everyone else, I hope it will. Good luck--

[Guest]

Frustration

Program without Topa

Hello to all,
I am new to this site and this thread, but I have been reading all posts for several days and would like to jump into this intriguing discussion. First, however, thank you Dee for your supportive post on the "new to this" thread. I appreciate it.
Admittedly I have no experience at either moderation or abstainence as I intend to start the program Monday after seeing my Dr. Nonetheless, my idea of moderation is to be able to drink to a point of feeling really good one night a week, and not feel compelled to drink every other night of the week as well, which has been my habit.
Roberta Jewell says in the book that "topiramate works by washing away excessive dopamine in the brain, which both reduces the pleasurable effects of alcohol and eliminates craving." If, when taking the topa, you don't feel good when drinking, what is the point of having a drink? Dee's being able to have just one glass of wine after 9 days of abstainence is an accomplishment, it seems to me, because surely after 9 days one glass would give you a pleasant buzz, so much so that you'd have to think two would do it better. Is moderation about control? And if you can control your drinking, to whatever extent, then you're not an alcoholic, because alcoholics "can never drink again" but problem drinkers can solve the problem? Actually, I do have a girlfriend who, 20 years ago, was completely out of control with cocaine and alcohol. She went into rehab, did AA, quit the cocaine, didn't drink for a long time, but these days, has a glass or two of wine a couple of times a week. So maybe cocaine was her real problem, not the alcohol? Thank you. LC

[Guest]

Frustration

Re: Program without Topa

Hi LC

First, Welcome. Please keep coming back. I am opinionated as you may have read many of my posts on the boards and I seemed to have made some people mad this week for whatever reason. Just remember these are my opinions, but I believe strongly in them as alcohol has caused a lot of pain in my life.

I have said before if you are coming to these boards searching for answers to a drinking problem, you can label yourself what you are comfortable with but the truth is they are one in the same: problem drinker, heavy drinker, and ultimately: alcoholic. An alcoholic in theory can never drink again. But we do. And we stop. Over and over again. It's why I struggled with sobriety so much over the last two years after I went to rehab. I had issues with AA, I knew I had to be sober, I was searching for ways to maintain my sobriety...

I did find this program, and it is only with this program (and topamax...or other drugs that alter brain chemistry) that I attempt moderation. It is only with advancements in medical science that I would attempt to have drink, and if the drug ceases to work, I will quit drinking again. I will enjoy one drink because I like the taste of wine, not because I am searching for a buzz anymore. Herein lies another issue and another major clue that points to the fact that you are an alcoholic/problem clue. Normal drinkers aren't in search of the "buzz" you are speaking of. In fact, I don't know if when you read that post, you realize how addictive your language is.

Finally, I would say that your friend is not adhering to AA/NA guidelines if she is still attending which is abstinence or desire to quit from all addictive substances if she is drinking. How long has she been drinking? It could be she is not an alcoholic, but she was abusing the substance when she was treated for cocaine addiction.

I'm glad you've found you're way to this board, and by all means, you're welcome to disagree with me.

[Guest]

Frustration

Re: Program without Topa

Actually, I was thinking about this post today. I asked my husband, a normal drinker if he drank for a "buzz". He really had to think for awhile. And he answered sometimes. But just the way he had to think about it made me know that he wasn't in the same category as "us". So, I guess, the truth is, really that normal people do drink for a buzz but a slight pleasant feeling one that they don't really think about ahead of time....or not at all like "we" do. And again, when I am totally honest about it, when I drink my one glass of wine on topamax, I may feel something...but it typically takes me at least an hour now to drink a glass a wine....not ten minutes like it used to. And if I ever feel that urge that I used to feel to "keep going", I know I will have to quit for awhile or my program isn't working right. Just wanted to add that.

[Guest]

Frustration

Re: program without topa

DeeBee,
Thanks to all, for the words of advice! It has been wonderful and very helpful. I have between 4 to 5 bottles of wine a week. It has been steadily increasing these past couple of years, and I realized ,as did my husband, that it was starting to be a concern when I would drink the whole bottle alone, and more if I started early enough. My whole day seemed to focus on when I would be able to open my bottle. Lately I can't have just one. I just received my CD's and am still waiting on kudzu. I haven't quit drinking yet , and admit I'm nervous to do so without all of the supplements and topa. I worry that if I fail, and it doesn't work for me what will I do than?
Wow, I just realized how much I'm banking on this to work.
I've tried quitting in the past, but have only made it about 10 days, and than I seem to drink to make up for lost time:/ I've decided to try again, once the kudzu comes in. I've heard good things about it reducing the cravings. At that time I'll have everything but the topa, and have a good base to start.
Thanks again to you all, this has been really helpful to me

[Guest]

Frustration

hi and no topa

hi laurajk
I am new to this and have left messages but no one has replied so I must be doing some thing wrong how do you create an in box, not very good at computers either ,but I am a very good wine drinker so much so its killing me,can you please advise and then maybe I can get support from you guys, as there is lots of good advice and help out there,hope to hear from you soon
regard
terssy

[Guest]

Frustration

what to do when people bring you alcohol as gifts

I am trying to help someone I love very much with his drinking probelm. None of his friends know about it. He is trying to quit himself with no medication. He has an anxiety disorder and stopped taking that medication which caused him to begin drinking. he is back on that medication and has been doing pretty well until he went to a game with his friends which promptly started his drinking again. It was acknowledged and he is stopping again. Hoepfully forevre. he recognizes that he cannot drink at all but in our society where EVERYONE assumes that EVERYONE drinks alcohol, it is hard. I worry about the holidays coming up and the fact that people often give him a nice bottle of scotch as a thank you after he completes a job for them. I pray for him to have strength and to somehow dig deep to have more willpower. If his friends knew, I know it would be a different story but he is to oembarrassed to tell them. Any advise would be most appreciative.