I guess I am still a newbie. I have been part of this group for about 2 months. I just want to share a little to maybe help others. We all have our own story. I never hit rock bottom, I never called out sick of work, nobody has ever mentioned that I drink to much. It was purely me....guilty, not remembering what show I watched or who I may have called (that was the worst part in the am...looking at my phone to see who I talked to and having NO IDEA of what it was about). I guess I was lucky. I have been around addiction education for a good part of my life and I realized the beast was too...chasing me.
Okay, my point is that I decided to make a change. I didn't want to go AF because it seemed overwhelming to say I would never drink again. I DID buy this book and ordered the supplements slowly. I did order the TOPA online as I was to embarrassed to talk to my DR. I did take the Topa and it did work and I believe that it helped me to break the bad habits I had developed. Unfortunately for me....I had bad side effects. In the three weeks that I did take it I did things very, very, differently. I used to come home from work and crack a beer (to start with) because for some reason, I thought I deserved it after a long working day. I replaced that beer with a glass of Ice Tea and used that to help me through dinner/ cooking time. Then, I decided to go back to the gym. So instead of being home at 5, I was home at 7. I felt like I was doing something good for myself and seemed conterproductive to start drinking in the evening (I like getting up early). Oh yes, I missed my little wine glass and sometimes I would even put something in it, but not very much. I just went to my first Tai Chai class tonight. I came home and made a little something to eat. The thought of drinking NEVER crossed my mind. I am grateful for this. I still take the supplements daily, (amino, evening primrose, B-12, Gaba, Glutemine and Kudzu). I think it's a combination of things. It's getting better. I love waking up and not hating myself. I love waking up and being sore from testing the boundaries of my PHYSICAL being and not from falling into a dresser. Off to the beach on Friday for a weekend with the girls. No longer worried if someone will "catch on" to me. I plan to bring board games and bathing suits. I will remember this weekend.
Life is beautiful everyone. There is a different road for everyone. We read posts and make some. Take what you need and leave the rest. I hope I have helped someone tonight. Happy tomorrow, happy me,,,,no more shiraz xoxoxo
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