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    #16
    veteran of multiple rehabs

    Hi Glen and Welcome

    In a way I can explain why we do this to ourselves.

    Alcohol is a very strong and addictive drug, period.

    If you are in a position where you have drunk enough of it (I worked in bars from a young age, it was part of my job) you will become addicted! It is actually not rocket science- Alcohol is only doing what it is supposed to do.

    Therefore if we stop drinking it the addiction will eventually fade although this takes a while, but that is all it is- a strong addictive drug, wrapped in nice names like Don Perignon and Baileys Smooth Irish Cream.

    We don't become addicted to carrots, apples or potatoes do we?!! No, simply because they are not addictive poisons, but nicotine, alcohol and heroin are (the latter killing far less people that the former two) and we are victims of huge propaganda campaigns that hit us as soon as we left the womb.

    OK, so we fell for it.

    Sorry if that seems to simplify things too much, but that is how I see it.

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      #17
      veteran of multiple rehabs

      Hi Glen,

      Time to get the vacuum going? Congrats on your 3 days. I have always found cleaning to be therapeutic, like I'm cleaning my head out, not just the house. Reward yourself and make way for a new life. Out with the old and in with the new as they say. Very happy to hear you're making progress, now dust my good man!

      V.

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        #18
        veteran of multiple rehabs

        update

        Marbella, I liked what you had to say about the addictiveness of alcohol. So true. Someone else posted ?view this as a fight for your life?, I have put this on my desktop as a reminder. 4th day AF and feeling healthier. I managed to have three meals yesterday. Maybe today I will get out of bed and do something? I really need to phone my kids which I have been putting off for about three mounths not wanting to deal with some issues with my eldest son. Yes vera-b, that?s exactly what I need to do today. The place is such a mess, it is depressing when I look at it. If I could make a sizable dent in it I would feel better about things. I?ve just finished my breakfast, time to make a start, without delay. :happy:

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          #19
          veteran of multiple rehabs

          Keep going Glen!

          You're making a start and thats the hardest bit!

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            #20
            veteran of multiple rehabs

            hi glenn,and welcome,there are a lot of us in the same boat as you,remember what they tot us in rehab,help comes in numbers,ive only had one stint,and that was enuff,take the good and leave the bad,those were the finest words ever spoken,your in a good place gyco

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              #21
              veteran of multiple rehabs

              5th day AF. Yesterday, in spite of my intention to start tidying. I went back to bed without doing a thing. I did however have three meals and dragged myself out of bed to go for an hour’s brisk walk. Well vera-b, I’ll have another go today at getting of my butt and doing some much needed tidying.

              May all your dreams come true
              Glen

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                #22
                veteran of multiple rehabs

                Welcome...You never have to be alone again.Soberiety is doable....IT REALLY IS!!!We are here and we CARE....Let us help EACH OTHER!!!!Evielou
                sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!

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                  #23
                  veteran of multiple rehabs

                  Glen,
                  WELCOME....I hope each day is getting a bit easier for you. Stick with us....there is tons of support here. Each day try to push yourself to do one thing more than the day before until you are back up to speed. Depression is rough, I know.
                  Forever loved, forever missed Papa Bear

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                    #24
                    veteran of multiple rehabs

                    Hi Glen,

                    Well, the IMPORTANT thing is you're not drinking. Congratulations! As you regain your strength and resolve, the rest of your life will begin to fall into place. Of course there will be a gazillion challenges. But as we face each one with all the gifts God gave us we can't help but grow. It's my fervent hope to do some personal growing this fall - it'll be the first fall season in years (many, I'm ashamed to admit) that won't be in a total fog (not going to let it happen!).

                    Now, my friend Glen - about your cleaning. Tomorrow (Tuesday) is my regular cleaning day. Some people on this site join cyber hands to remain AF. They set a date and start the countdown. Why don't you and I join together for a cleaning day - let's clean our homes and while we're at it, clean out some of those alkie thoughts that hold us down. Game?

                    V.

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                      #25
                      veteran of multiple rehabs

                      :hello2::colorwelcome: I am sorry that I am so late in welcoming you. I lost my internet connection for a week. Day 5. That is Awesome. I am also a veteran of multiple rehabs. My first was back in 1989 when they used to put us with the psychiatric patients. Think I got "scared" straight as I only drank once in the next 10 years.lol. Picked the booze back up in 1999, and was in rehab in 2000,2001,2003. I have also been in and out of AA all of these years. I am so happy to have found this forum. I still go to AA now and then, but I get most of my support here. I will NEVER give up!!! I know that I will die a long, miserable, lonely death if I do not fight this. Nice to meet you. I hope to see you on the boards.
                      "Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)

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                        #26
                        veteran of multiple rehabs

                        Well Done Glen.... day 5 AF!! :goodjob:

                        Give yourself a pat on the back.

                        Like Cindi advised, start by reading the book, stock up on the suppliments and get that body shaking!:alf:
                        "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

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                          #27
                          veteran of multiple rehabs

                          Update

                          Resolve? What resolve? That?s how I feel at the moment any way. If I have money, I will buy alcohol. Truthfully, I have been sober for the last five days because I have had no money. I will buy alcohol with little thought of the consequences. I use this character trait in reverse to stop drinking by spending all my money on food and bills on benefit day so that I have no money with which to buy alcohol for the rest on the week. The down side is (because I only care about now and not the consequences of later) that on benefit day I will buy a cask of wine to make me happy now. The wine will be gone in a day leaving me to go without for the rest of the week. Who cares about the rest of the week, so long as I am happy now.

                          The upside is that I get some AF time. Some breathing space. Some time to let the fog clear and think about the consequences of drinking. Some time to come here and get some encouragement and learn how to beat this thing. It?s pay time in 40 minutes. So you may not here from me for a day or two? God I hate my lake of control. I guess five days sober is better than no days sober. It?s a start

                          I did manage to do some cleaning today, if only a little. J
                          thanks for all the support.
                          Glen

                          P.S I?m great at sabotaging my life. Why not sabotage my drinking?

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                            #28
                            veteran of multiple rehabs

                            Glen hang around on-line for support and leave the money in the bank!!

                            Use your money to buy the book on-line, download it and spend today reading. Then head out to the shops tomorrow and stock up with the suppliments, they really do help with the cravings. Make an appointment with your Doctor to discuss the different meds, I found Topa really helpfull and even though I would still have the odd drink it just did not hold the same appeal to me.

                            Good luck for today!
                            "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

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                              #29
                              veteran of multiple rehabs

                              Hi Glen
                              Hope you are not half way through that cask of wine by now. Can you give your benefit money to a friend when you get it or before you get it so that you just get what is left after paying the bills? I used to do that with my brother - he had his wages paid into my account and I paid his bills (mostly parking tickets) and then I gave him the balance - mind you he was only 19 at the time and his wife has him under the thumb now TG!! I dont live very far away from you so if you need a bit of eye to eye support let me know.
                              BH (no more)

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                                #30
                                veteran of multiple rehabs

                                Oh Glen,

                                I hear your desperation and defeat. It's so hard to move in a healthy direction when your thoughts are so convinced you're not worth the effort. Think about that for a moment. How can that possibly be? The creator of the universe made you in his image, but you don't think he knew what he was doing! It may not seem like it now, but you are so worth it. It may take you awhile to realize it, but it wouldn't hurt to practice being good to yourself while you're at it. We'll support you all the way. You are worth every ounce of kindness you give yourself, I'm absolutely convinced of that.

                                V.

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