Hi all I'm new here. I have decided that enough is enough with my drinking and I need to realise that I can't handle alcohol, alcohol handles me. I'm not an alcoholic or alchol dependant, but my problem is once I start I can't stop and I have ended up on some states that I am ashamed and angry at myself for the next day and for a few days afterwards.
I have always loved drinking and going out for a dance and getting drunk with my friends, but I'm only 5 foot and really shouldn't be drinking the same amounts as they do. I still live at home with quite over protective and concerned parents, so I don't actually get drunk that often, but when I do I don't do it in halves! I am moving out into my own place next year and I am worried that once I get the freedom to do what I want I will be drinking far too much and putting myself more at risk. I always start with 'just the one drink' and then end up paraletic and unable to eat, drink, do anything for three days afterwards.
The turning point has been in the last few weeks. I got drunk a few weeks ago, had two cans of lager and as usual 'got in the party spirit' and went out to get some more, aiming to spread them over two nights. Of course they all went in the one night, I made a complete fool of myself and had to be put to bed. For two days afterwards I was ill, ashamed and depressed. Monday night I went to a do after work, everyone else was having just the one glass of wine, I was downing them one after the other. I got dropped off near my road and I was taking ages to get home, texting stupid messages etc, I found myself on this wall and I have no idea why I was there. I can remember jumping down to the pavement, it was a high wall and I was in the air for about 3 seconds before slamming into the floor. I can remember lying there thinking 'oowwww!' I arrived home with cuts on my forehead and the bridge of my nose and a big graze on my chin. Have four bruises on my knee, have badly scratched my glasses and really damaged my foot. It is swollen up and bruised and I can only walk flat footed as the toes on the foot have been bent back. I rang in sick at work yesterday which I felt so guilty and stupid about. I just couldn't walk and had to crawl everywere. All my family is angry with me for coming home in that state once again. They've told me so many times to avoid alcohol because I can't handle it.
Anyway after Monday night I have realised just how stupid I was, I could have been killed or been attacked or anything. I don't want to live my life getting over the pain and humiliation of hangovers, so I have made the break and decided to go teetotal. I don't know whether I will achieve this but I am pretty determained and this site looks a really supportive place, I'm so glad to have found it and been able to join you all.
I have always loved drinking and going out for a dance and getting drunk with my friends, but I'm only 5 foot and really shouldn't be drinking the same amounts as they do. I still live at home with quite over protective and concerned parents, so I don't actually get drunk that often, but when I do I don't do it in halves! I am moving out into my own place next year and I am worried that once I get the freedom to do what I want I will be drinking far too much and putting myself more at risk. I always start with 'just the one drink' and then end up paraletic and unable to eat, drink, do anything for three days afterwards.
The turning point has been in the last few weeks. I got drunk a few weeks ago, had two cans of lager and as usual 'got in the party spirit' and went out to get some more, aiming to spread them over two nights. Of course they all went in the one night, I made a complete fool of myself and had to be put to bed. For two days afterwards I was ill, ashamed and depressed. Monday night I went to a do after work, everyone else was having just the one glass of wine, I was downing them one after the other. I got dropped off near my road and I was taking ages to get home, texting stupid messages etc, I found myself on this wall and I have no idea why I was there. I can remember jumping down to the pavement, it was a high wall and I was in the air for about 3 seconds before slamming into the floor. I can remember lying there thinking 'oowwww!' I arrived home with cuts on my forehead and the bridge of my nose and a big graze on my chin. Have four bruises on my knee, have badly scratched my glasses and really damaged my foot. It is swollen up and bruised and I can only walk flat footed as the toes on the foot have been bent back. I rang in sick at work yesterday which I felt so guilty and stupid about. I just couldn't walk and had to crawl everywere. All my family is angry with me for coming home in that state once again. They've told me so many times to avoid alcohol because I can't handle it.
Anyway after Monday night I have realised just how stupid I was, I could have been killed or been attacked or anything. I don't want to live my life getting over the pain and humiliation of hangovers, so I have made the break and decided to go teetotal. I don't know whether I will achieve this but I am pretty determained and this site looks a really supportive place, I'm so glad to have found it and been able to join you all.
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