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**Gumby** · September 22, 2008, 11:23 AM

I really need to make this change

Mari, The mere fact that you are here says something. The recognition that you have to do something about your drinking habits say that you are on the right path. You have come to a good place. Good job on the no drink today...keep it up.... you can do it. I to will have no drink today.... Peace.

**paisley** · September 22, 2008, 11:24 AM

I really need to make this change

Hey Mari,

i can totally relate to your situation and there is nothing good that could come out of the problem that we face with this poison that we are addicted to. So I can start a new with you today. We can motivate each other. I will keep tabs throughout the day to see how you are.

BTW, i am pissed with all this weight i gained. i need to lose like 20lbs.

**Cheech66** · September 22, 2008, 11:29 AM

I really need to make this change

Mari,

You are starting where all of us has not drinking today!!! Do what you have to do to get threw [U]today. There is tons of good info here but the one thing I can say is drink WATER lots of it and it is going to feel like hell for a while but when you are having a tough time and want that drink have WATER!!! keep posting it really helps with the lonlinesss my thoughts will be with you I assure you are not alone!!!!!!

**Janice** · September 22, 2008, 11:36 AM

I really need to make this change

Welcome Mari.......it just creeps up on us doesn't it? The good news is that we CAN get our lives back, we can take control. Today is Day 1 for me too, its going to be the first day of a better life!

look forward to seeing you around the boards,

Janicexxx

**savon19** · September 22, 2008, 12:01 PM

I really need to make this change

Mari - your title says it all: "I really need to make this change"!!

I totally relate to your being married, yet lonely & bored. (Altho I'm not married now) I used to wonder how that could be possible, to be married yet lonely. But it IS.

If you can afford it, how about joining a gym? I joined Curves this past March, and it's the only gym I've stuck with!! Even tho' I have to (often!) force myself to go, I really do feel better when I do. Even if it's just to get out & see people. Definitely helps my mood... and I think I'm actually seeing some results!! I used to quit before that happened...

It makes you feel like, well, at least I did ONE good thing today! It doesn't mean you won't drink, but I think anything that helps build self-esteem makes quitting drinking easier...

(PS - I really doubt you'd have physical withdrawals. You probably will have cravings, but more psychological... Just my opinion!)

**Evie.Lou** · September 22, 2008, 12:09 PM

I really need to make this change

I started slowing down my drinking by changing to lite beer and forcing myself to drink a whole big glass of water,in between.I was then able to stop without major medical help.I remember how great it felt to finally wake up and want Coffee,not Beer.You will benefit by reading and rereading the MWO.book.There is tons of help here,for you.Many,many wonderful people that have been where you are and found they.re Way OUT...You CAN DO THIS,I KNOW YOU CAN..

**raineyjane** · September 22, 2008, 12:22 PM

I really need to make this change

Hi, I'm not drinking today!!! I need to keep checking in here all day. My mother is making me crazy! and I keep crying! My little dog is watching my face right now wondering about the tears... He is such a love. hope you keep checking in here as well
raineyjane

**mari** · September 22, 2008, 02:29 PM

I really need to make this change

Savon19
Thank you so much for your encouraging words. I do belong to a gym. A women's gym that I have belonged to for years. I went yesterday for the first time in a while. Your'e right, it did feel great.

Mari

**mari** · September 22, 2008, 02:32 PM

I really need to make this change

Hi Paisley,

Thanks for your reply. I would love to have someone to monitor our drinking and exercising with. I hope that logging on here a couple times of day and talking with people will help motivate me to be more positive.

**gyco** · September 22, 2008, 02:42 PM

I really need to make this change

mari you can do it,just in your words,lots of mders here and lots of total abstainers like me tht fall in that dirty ditch again hahaha,i didn fall in a ditch but i am moddding and as successfully as total abstinance, stik around lots of great people and lots of knowledge we all have been where you are gyco

**gyco** · September 22, 2008, 02:43 PM

I really need to make this change

daung you d almost think i was drunk hahahha cant even rt gonna scare here away hahaha you no wht i mean

**vera-b** · September 22, 2008, 07:55 PM

I really need to make this change

Welcome Mari,

I can so relate to your situation. I was the "trailing spouse" for all of our moves. One of the things my husband has acknowledged is that for the person with the new job (hubbies in this case) there is a built-in "family" in the new location. By that I mean they already know people (work), have purpose (new position) and direction (new location). For the trailing spouse, it's starting all over in a strange place with no friends and often no family. It is the trailing spouse who finds the new dentist, gets the kids to their new school, and fills the gas tank and grocery cart from newly discovered places. And that's not easy. And AL can be our new "friend" at times like these. But as you're discovering, AL is no friend at all. You're probably not the town newbie you were when the booze started to escalate, but perhaps it's time to more fully explore your community so that you don't need to rely on AL for the company. The MWO program is great - looking forward to hearing from you. We'll help you as much as we possibly can.

Vera-b

**time2change** · September 22, 2008, 08:10 PM

I really need to make this change

Welcome Mari
This really is a great place where you will find so many people that are in the same situation as you. You are not alone and you will receive alot of support and advice from this site. Read all you can. It helps to be reminded that there are others who feel the same way you do.

**bestlifeldms** · September 24, 2008, 12:57 PM

I really need to make this change

Mari,

Good that you are here. I can relate, only, I am 20 years older than you, and just quit. I wish I had those 20 years back. You have the chance to change things now. We all know this is a progressive problem. It goes from drinking on the week ends, to a couple here and there through the week to each week night to too many every week night to all day every day. That can change and you are the one who can change it. The fact that you have acknowledged it and are here is great. Exercise, awsome! Setting a plan to titrate down, slowly, as Evie mentioned will probably help you avoid withdrawl. If you can do this, I would write out a plan, and stick to it. You can do this. We are here to support and never judge you! Hugs, Best

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