Accepting Releasing Emotions

[fickle]

Accepting Releasing Emotions

Hi WIP,
I guess we just cross-posted... sorry 'bout that.
I will have a look at that reference you gave me above.. a little later as it is getting close to midnight here.
May I say how happy I am to have joined this discussion.
Best wishes to all,
Fickle

[A Work in Progress]

Accepting Releasing Emotions

savon19;422201 wrote: Great stuff, WIP!
I believe God forgives us our sins/mistakes, etc., but I remember saying to a Christian friend not long ago that I REMIND God, after being forgiven, of my sins, etc.! It's like I say, "It's great to be forgiven for this... but Don't Forget what I did/said 10 years ago!!" HUH?? ...

I really think stuff like this should be taught to kids in HS (old enough to Maybe understand?). It's very possible, going back to my first thought, that it could help kids avoid using drugs/AL to "stuff their emotions"... which then only build up... causing more stuffing, etc.

But not only in terms of AL, if we learned early on how to meaningfully cope (the Middle Way, as you say) with emotions, many lives would be better in the long run.

Yeah, Savon, you are right on, kids should be taught how to do this stuff. Daniel Goleman's book, Emotional Intelligence, ought to be something all teachers use in some way, as well as all parents... I know it's a tall order, but some interesting things are starting in some schools, for example using mindfulness meditation for kids with attentional AND behavioral problems...

And I totally get the business of continually re-visiting (in our memories and in our emotions) the scenes of our "crimes." It's a bad habit, something important to (compassionately!) wean ourselves out of.

Thanks for starting this thread!

wip

[A Work in Progress]

Accepting Releasing Emotions

fickle;422207 wrote: EFT - Emotional Freedom Technique
EFT Provides Impressive Health and Emotional Freedom--New Discovery Often Works Where Nothing Else
Love
Fickle

Fickle, are you using this technique? Can you tell us more about how it works? It's new to me.

wip

[fickle]

Accepting Releasing Emotions

Hi WIP,

I have not yet mastered this technique myself, but I have had someone else use EFT with me. I found it very powerful.

To put it plainly, it is a simple method of staying present during very distressing emotional moments and/or memories. It involves a very simple process of tapping one's self on the face & body in certain places during a distressing moment or memory to prevent yourself 'disappearing'. It's MAGIC as far as confronting things go and making some of the fear go away.

You can do EFT alone, however in my experience, having another person to do it with you is really great. Personal preference of course.

Hey! Hugs & Thanks for a great thread!!
:l

[savon19]

Accepting Releasing Emotions

I just watched video on EFT - Amazing (if true!).

Will get their free manual in my email to check out...

[A Work in Progress]

Accepting Releasing Emotions

fickle;422264 wrote: I have not yet mastered this technique myself, but I have had someone else use EFT with me. I found it very powerful.

To put it plainly, it is a simple method of staying present during very distressing emotional moments and/or memories. It involves a very simple process of tapping one's self on the face & body in certain places during a distressing moment or memory to prevent yourself 'disappearing'. It's MAGIC as far as confronting things go and making some of the fear go away.

Well, that makes a lot of sense. The "tapping" serves as a physical reminder (or "grounding" or "centering" tool), to help one to "return" to the experience of what is going on right now, instead of escaping into other thoughts. Probably it would be very useful in dealing with urges/cravings, as well. I have used a similar method to teach counselors how to keep from getting over-involved in the emotional states of the people they are working with.

wip

[LVT25]

Accepting Releasing Emotions

There's new evidence of the effectiveness of what is known as a "distancing" approach for dealing with one's uncomfortable emotions. This approach is closely related to the practice of mindfulness (meditation), within which one takes what is sometimes called an "observer" stance in recognizing emotions, without getting overly enmeshed in them. I have often taught this approach by using the term "optimal emotional distance." When distressing emotions occur, we have three possible stances that we can take. One could be described as a cool, dismissive, rejecting stance, in which we ignore or try to "get rid of" the emotional experience. Another is a hotter, over-involved stance, in which we tend to make matters worse by getting deeply engaged in the emotion (much like throwing gasoline onto a small fire). Most effective is a position somewhere in the middle range between the two, in which the emotion is recognized and named (it is observed), and it is felt ("I am feeling angry right now,") but the mind steps back just enough to prevent it from being overwhelming, and from allowing it to dominate one's entire experience.

I also get the "Daily OM" and saved this article. This describes me to a T. When I find myself in a discussion I'm uncomfortable with, I either get angry and defensive and end up yelling, or in order to avoid that response I walk away and stew. I really wish I could learn to control that!