I'm crabby and I have a question.
I don't like labels either and agree with Bossman.
I think there are a few other things to say. You talk about the negative things about an alcoholic (unreliable etc.) I am pretty sure at AA meetings that they don't use the word in that way. AAthlete uses the words recovered alcoholics but I thought AA encourages people to say I am an alcoholic forever and to use the word recovering. First, I think they use it to remind themselves that the problem is still there but just dormant, as Darling says, so that they never get complacent and think they can never drink again. It's not that they think that there is something negative with the label. They share their drunk stories and are accepting of each other.
But second, as Bossman says, no test aside from this flimsy questionnaire. So it's scientifically suspect. You might want to read Alan Carr's EasyWay To Stop Drinking for an alternative view of alcoholism and recovery without a label. He expresses some of the views you express. Ex-smokers don't have to go around calling themselves recovering.
As Work in Progress says, you could go to AA meetings and take what you want while leaving the rest. The best thing they offer, in my view, is access to a network of great people (search around for the right meeting) you can meet with face to face, understand what you are going through and who like to do things sober.
Or you could use programs that don't require you to say you are still an alcoholic or to identify yourself that way. These include: My way out, SMART recovery and Women for Sobriety, all of which emphasize health not disease-ism of AA.
But really the main issue for you is your own guilt about alcoholism. You need to face that. Maybe see a psychologist? There really are some wonderful, talented people with drinking problems. It's not a death sentence and it doesn't mean you are a bad person. I know you feel badly about the way you acted. But you need to love yourself entirely in order to get past this flaw.
I don't like labels either and agree with Bossman.
I think there are a few other things to say. You talk about the negative things about an alcoholic (unreliable etc.) I am pretty sure at AA meetings that they don't use the word in that way. AAthlete uses the words recovered alcoholics but I thought AA encourages people to say I am an alcoholic forever and to use the word recovering. First, I think they use it to remind themselves that the problem is still there but just dormant, as Darling says, so that they never get complacent and think they can never drink again. It's not that they think that there is something negative with the label. They share their drunk stories and are accepting of each other.
But second, as Bossman says, no test aside from this flimsy questionnaire. So it's scientifically suspect. You might want to read Alan Carr's EasyWay To Stop Drinking for an alternative view of alcoholism and recovery without a label. He expresses some of the views you express. Ex-smokers don't have to go around calling themselves recovering.
As Work in Progress says, you could go to AA meetings and take what you want while leaving the rest. The best thing they offer, in my view, is access to a network of great people (search around for the right meeting) you can meet with face to face, understand what you are going through and who like to do things sober.
Or you could use programs that don't require you to say you are still an alcoholic or to identify yourself that way. These include: My way out, SMART recovery and Women for Sobriety, all of which emphasize health not disease-ism of AA.
But really the main issue for you is your own guilt about alcoholism. You need to face that. Maybe see a psychologist? There really are some wonderful, talented people with drinking problems. It's not a death sentence and it doesn't mean you are a bad person. I know you feel badly about the way you acted. But you need to love yourself entirely in order to get past this flaw.
Norma....that's the beauty of this program ! When your AF or Moderate........all those stero-types don't apply ! IAD.
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