Another Newbie...

[Seacailin]

Another Newbie...

Hello and Welcome Matchee
You have been given great advice already. I too felt very hopeless, and still do sometimes. I have to use all of the tools that I can get. I go to AA meetings, and come here, and go to Live Chat, sometimes when my ass is on fire, and sometimes just to chat. This place has saved me more than once. "When the student is ready, the Teacher will Appear". Best wishes. Hope to see you around.

[Chelle12]

Another Newbie...

Hi Matchee...I live opposite a liquor store... actually TWO of them, so I know how hard it is for you.
Hang in there matey... you can do this.
Love,
C

[dlw]

Another Newbie...

Hi Matchee. Welcome, I am a newby too- 8 days in MWO. First and foremost, pat yourself on the back, you're here- and that is step one. Now take a deep breath and know that you have a few rough days coming. First, the hangover- then a few days to replenish your body of the nutrients it needs. Water and food
Take it One day at a time, and if that is to much to handle, break it down- 4 hours at a time, if that scares you, go for 1 hour - or even 15 minutes at a time.

Read all the blogs, your not alone here. I have been on this website for only 8 days, but about 5 hours on and off per day The roughest for me was the first 3 days. You can do this,
Go for it, dont look back- :welcome:

DLW 8 DAYS AF (20 years of addiction)

[tlrgs]

Another Newbie...

:hello2::colorwelcome::wave::groupluv:

[GoodAsGold]

Another Newbie...

WELCOME MATCHEE!!!

Hi there matchee & :welcome:

So glad you've decided to join us, we need all the help we can get!

I think I understand your feelings. You say "I'm hanging on to all of it with a single thread." And then "I drink a pint of cheap vodka down in 2 gulps. It's pathetic but to me I don't see anything wrong with it."

That sounds like the kind of conflicted feelings I've had. I drink too much every night, want to stop, but haven't really been trying because I'm scared basically. It seems safer to keep my habit than risk failure or the discomfort of withdrawal & learning to live without my crutch.

My thinking has changed radically in the few weeks I've been here. I now know that I can stop & feel brave enough to try. And keep on trying if I have to. There is so much support, understanding & good advice here. I now know that the rest is up to me

I'd suggest you take your time, cruise around the threads a lot & post comments & questions as much as you can. You've already taken some very positive steps :goodjob: going to the Dr, arranging an appt with the shrink & JOINING US!!!!

Good Luck to you & stay close, we'll be here for you every step of the way
Gold

[matchee]

Another Newbie...

Thank you so much for the positive feedback. I had 2 beers on Saturday in a social setting but I had nothing yesterday and intend on abstaining tonight. So I'm getting there- there is a "what to do with myself" around 9PM. This is the time I'd normally be sneaking sips. I went to bed because I couldn't think of anything else to do. That's what I think is scariest- the boredom factor. I've been equivilating alcohol to fun for 20 years! But I like the way I feel ( not hung over- or tired) And I even see some of the swelling coming out of my face.

Again thanks for your support.

[lil.michelle]

Another Newbie...

Hey!!! First of all, WELCOME! This site is great. Everyone is supportive!

Maybe you drank due to habbit. Give it time. It's takes time to break out of this habbit but it can be done. Stay strong, keep posting and i look forward to getting to know you better!

[matchee]

Another Newbie...

lil.michelle;446868 wrote: Hey!!! First of all, WELCOME! This site is great. Everyone is supportive!

Maybe you drank due to habbit. Give it time. It's takes time to break out of this habbit but it can be done. Stay strong, keep posting and i look forward to getting to know you better!

You too, thanks for the support!

[matchee]

Another Newbie...

Well since last week I've gone onto my old ways. Still taking the Campral but drinking on it. Hiding it better. Haven't got caught- justifying my actions. It's pathetic. I wish I knew- why.

It's just the beast having his way with me.

[Seacailin]

Another Newbie...

Hi matchee
I am glad that u are still here. I know exactly how you feel. I have been there so many times; hiding alcohol from my family, getting rid of the empties when they are out; feeling helpless and hopeless. I have lost everything in the past; including my freedom; did 4 months in jail too. You just can't scare an alchoholic and that kind of sucks. I have had long periods of sobriety in the past, with the help of AA. I have been struggling to put together more than 40 days AF over the past four years. I just keep trying. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. I am tired of losing jobs, homes, relationships, and as I get older, I am getting more and more physical illness from alcohol. It will kill us, so we must fight. If your current plan is not working, you need to formulate a new plan. We must be willing to do whatever it takes. I do wish you well.

[Red-Wine]

Another Newbie...

Patricia ... is that you ? - we joined the same day I think ...I managed 6 weeks alcohol free, and then got clever, went on holiday, thought I could do the 'just a glass or two' and now I'm worse than I was ... why is that ? I know this will kill me if I carry on drinking 1 litre of wine a night .... yet , I do it.

Second time around seems so much harder to consider - to be honest, 1st time was not that bad - I managed, will everyone just please give me headslaps !

[SandyWaters]

Another Newbie...

Try Topamax?

Hey Matchee,
Instead of Campral, have you considered Topamax? My doc prescribed Campral for me, but said I should start taking it once I STOPPED drinking, which never happened. Next time I saw him, I asked for a prescription of Topamax, armed with the Lancet article, and he gave me a prescription. My AL cravings have gone way down, and I've been able to moderate pretty successfully. I've also integrated the supps and CDs, so it may be combo of all that stuff. May be worth a try??
SW

[startingover]

Another Newbie...

Hi Matchee, I am glad you are back, I was wondering how you were doing.
I used to wonder why all the time. I rarely got and answer. What I try to do now is not analyse so much but just DO IT and then see whats what. I have tied myself in knots for years thinking if I knew why I did what I did then I would find an answer. I havent yet, but I have stopped drinking and am now trying to deal with the here and now rather than the past so much.
I hope you are good today. Stay in touch Matchee

[matchee]

Another Newbie...

Thanks all. Bad night last night. Wife found one bottle. I explained it was a "small" one. She still got pissed and threatened to cheat on me. WTF?

I then drank one of the "big" bottles.

She later noticed I was drunk.

I'm in bad shape.

But I'm still taking my Campral religously!

[startingover]

Another Newbie...

Oh Matchee, I am sorry to hear that.
Did you say you were going to get some other type of help?
What about Topa? I understand that reduces cravings