My first time -- still drinking

[manny]

My wife surprised me by coming home for lunch today. Caught me half way thru a 12-pack. Not the first time. But she's at her breaking point. I have a good job, two beautiful girls, a nice house, and a sexy if unaffectionate wife. I don't drink due to circumstances, but because that's what I've always done (since high school some 20+ years ago). I don't know what to do now. I'm not religious, and don't like groups (AA). Our marriage has been so-so the last few years ... I'm far more concerned about losing my little girls right now.

By the way, after she went back to work, I bought some beer and kept on drinking. I feel really hopeless now. IT has me.

Been hearing radio ads for some "newest research" CDs that can help.

[KAT20]

My first time -- still drinking

Manny Hello and welcome, This is a great place. Download and read the book. You have made the first step by admitting a problem. I started with here and a therapist. I just joined AA. You may be suprised as there are many different types of AA meetings. Mine is all women. You can find all men as well. The religous part isn't as bad as I thought. Your god can be any power greater than yourself. Anyway, for now keep talking to people here and read the book. Welcome

[manny]

My first time -- still drinking

Thank you. Didn't know about "the book."

[GoodAsGold]

My first time -- still drinking

A very warm welcome to you manny, so glad you found us!

I've only been here a few weeks. Ask questions, post threads, share or just cruise the threads a while, listening. You have a whole new family now. The only rule here... THERE ARE NO RULES!
Keep safe

[AAthlete]

My first time -- still drinking

Manny, I can't tell you what to do - I can only tell you what worked for me - and that was a lot of soul-searching and a combination of AA and MWO.

Much like you, my wife was at her wits end. She came home from school one night and I was passed out on the couch and my son had fallen asleep beside me. She had caught me many, many times before and I always said I would change - and then I would go right on drinking when the heat was off.

She was ready to leave with my son, and was crying because she thought his birthday party would be our last together as a family. I went upstairs, hit my knees, and asked God to help me out.. I had reached my bottom.... and was willing to do ANYTHING so that I would be able to see my son's face in the morning. I still loved my wife, but the thought of doing that to my son ate me up....

So the next morning I hit my first AA meeting. Did I love it? Nope - but it was full of people who could relate to me and I to them, and they told me they had a plan for me. I hated the idea of relying on God, but remember I was willing to do anything to make this work, so I stuck with it and it slowly came to me. I found my way out, and by the grace of God still have my family today. I have changed in ways that I would have never thought possible, and it is all because of MWO as well as AA.

In the end you need to find your own path, but being honest with yourself and having the willingness to change are the keys. My wife had been going to Al-Anon, so I truly believe at the time that going to AA was the only action that I could take to save my family. MWO now enhances and strengthens what I would there and both of them together have kept me sober for almost a year and a half.

God, your story sounds so much like mine it is scary... If you have a chance and feel like it take a look at some of my old posts. I think you'll find a lot of similarities between us in them.

[manny]

My first time -- still drinking

Thank you AAthlete

Still don't know if I can do the "God" thing, but you've given me some hope as well as much to think about.

[tlrgs]

My first time -- still drinking

:hello2::colorwelcome::wave::groupluv:

[AAthlete]

My first time -- still drinking

I would encourage to spend some time here reading and to also get the book. There is a lot of information to be gleaned from both and they can help you make whatever decision you feel is right for you.

Manny, one thing I can tell you is a good group will not shove it down your throat, but rather ask you to come up with your own conception of God. It probably took a good six months before I was comfortable with the concept as well. I used to be sure there was no God because what kind of God would let people kill other people or let little children starve to death, right? I realized I was looking at the God the church taught me; my God created the universe but is not involved in shaping or molding people's lives daily. Someone else's might be completely different than mine and that's okay.

I wish you the best of luck.

[vlad]

My first time -- still drinking

Welcome Manny!

[Starlight Impress Forever]

My first time -- still drinking

Hi manny and welcome.

You only think "IT" has you. It`s a hard fight to free yourself and I hope you find what you need here. Having the courage to come here says that you want to be free. I wish you the best.

Star x

[manny]

My first time -- still drinking

Thanks all, sincerely. Something about the anonimity of the computer that makes the group thing OK. Comforting to know I'm not alone. Hope I can get it together before I lose the family.

[christyacc]

My first time -- still drinking

Hi Manny...

You have had some excellent advice here.....follow your heart...we have buried it deep deep down, but it is always there, we just need to listen......

We're here for you!

Christy

ps. I sent you a PM

[seila1]

My first time -- still drinking

Manny:

I completely understand how you feel about IT and feeling lack of control. Take it one day at a time and by reaching out, you've done the right thing. I havn't wanted to do AA, I like the anonymity here. I have the very same feelings about God and until I feel I can come to terms with things, I don't want to sit in a group. I also don't want to disappoint anyone anymore, most of all myself, I can come here and know that help is a few clicks away. This was my first step or reach to others for help. So, stay, talk and find some solace that you are not alone.

[DeeBee]

My first time -- still drinking

Welcome Manny!

This place has helped so many people, I hope you will be one of them:-)

[Guitarista]

My first time -- still drinking

Hi all. just dropping by..missed the jist of things but can say. Welcome Manny. great site and ppl. here bro'... a wealth of info and inspiration, use it/us...and stick around! G.