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[Pride before Fall]

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I Need to Stop Drinking. What Should I Do?

1. Reality check: where are you on the consumption spectrum? An AUDIT score >7 meets DSM-IV criteria for at-risk drinking.
http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_d...&id=1860&cn=14
2. Make a list of the reasons you want to quit. Keep the list around as a reminder.
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...ing-22609.html.
3. Make a plan. Set a date to stop drinking. Post it in a place where you can see it often. Keep a copy in your purse or wallet. http://www.cigna.com/healthinfo/pdf/form_tj2794.pdf
4. Share your plan with others. Talk with your family members and trusted friends about your plan. Let them know how they can help you be successful.
5. Evaluate your progress. Try a plan for 30 days. At the end of that period, review your reasons for stopping. Write down the benefits. Compare the lists.
6. If you drink before the 30 day goal, don’t give up, begin again. Use your experience to help you stick with your plan this time.
7. Continue your new behaviors. Set a goal for another 30 days. New behavior takes a while to become habit.
8. If you are repeatedly unable to stick to your plan, get outside help. Talk with a doctor, call addiction support services in your area, join a self-help group, or do all three. If you are not sure whether a self-help group is for you but would like to try, go at least 3 times before you make your decision. Different groups, even within the same organization, can have a very different ‘feel’ and focus.

Smart Recovery: SMART Recovery? | Self Help for Alcoholism & Addiction
Women for Sobriety: Welcome to Women For Sobriety, Inc.
Alcoholics Anonymous: Alcoholics Anonymous :
Secular Organizations for Sobriety: Addiction - Non 12 Step - Support Group - Index
LifeRing: http://lifering.org
16 Steps for Discovery and Empowerment: 16-Steps for Discovery and Empowerment

9. Avoid stumbling blocks. You may need to find new friends or adopt a new lifestyle if your current life revolves around alcohol.
10. Reward yourself. Use the money you spent on drinking to do something fun with your family or friends or to get something you’ve wanted for yourself but were reluctant to spend the money on. Make this a regular practice when you meet a personal goal.
__________________

[greeneyes]

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This was from The Daily OM and makes an important point

Putting Our Tools to Use
Bringing Inspiration into Form

Many of us have so many life tools we have learned, but sometimes we forget to use them. Revisit your toolbox.


Every craftsperson has a toolbox full of tools and a number of techniques to help them bring inspiration into form. In the same way, throughout our lives, we have discovered our own life tools and techniques?the ways and means that have helped us create our lives up to this point. Sometimes we forget about the tools and skills we?ve acquired, and we wonder why we aren?t moving forward. At times like these, it might just be a matter of remembering what we already know, and rediscovering the tools we already have at our disposal.

In the process of becoming who we are and creating our lives, we have all gone through the experience of being inspired to do something and then finding the tools we needed to do it. If we look back, we may be able to remember that we used, for example, the tool of writing every day in order to clarify our intentions. We may also have used the tools of ritual, meditation, or visualization to make something happen. In addition, we may have been fueled by a new idea about how the universe works, which is what gave us the inspiration to use these tools.

In order for ideas to be powerful, they must be imbued with the energy of our engagement with them, and in order for tools to be effective they must be put to use. This sounds obvious, but often we fall into the habit of thinking we are engaging with ideas and using tools by virtue of the fact that we are reading about them, or listening to other people talk about them. In truth, using our tools is a very personal action, one we must take on behalf of ourselves. Like artists, we are each unique and no two of us will receive the same inspiration, nor will we bring it into form in the same two ways. To discover the truth of our own vision, we must take action by remembering our tools and putting them to use.

[brightlite]

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From An Anonymous Author....

I drank for joy and became miserable.

I drank to be outgoing and became self centered.

I drank to be sociable and became lonely.

I drank for friendship and made enemies.

I drank to soften sorrow and wallowed in self-pity.

I drank for sleep and awakened without rest.

I drank for strength and felt weak.

I drank for relaxation and got the shakes.

I drank for confidence and felt unsure

I drank for courage and became afraid

I drank for assurance and became doubtful

I drank to forget thoughts and had blackouts

I drank for conversation and tied my tongue

I drank to be in heaven and I came to know hell

I drank to forget and became haunted

I drank for freedom and became a slave (of alcohol)

I drank to ease problems and saw them multiply

I drank to cope with life and invited death.

I drank because I had the "right" to and everything turned out wrong.

Said this fellow, "It must have taken a bunch of booze to get you in this shape?

I said, "Just one. For me one is too many and a thousand isn't enough."

[Bean]

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Stinking Thinking

Hi Everyone

I want to wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day! I hope you have love in your lives but more importantly, love for yourselves. It seems we totally neglect that when we drink. I just found this handout my counsellor gave me over a year ago. It goes out to everyone starting out or thinking about it...

All i can say is IT'S SO WORTH IT!! I realized this morning that I used to wake up EVERY day and my heart would sink that it was morning again and I felt like crap but knowing I would have to go out and get more alcohol later that day. I constantly felt like I was on a merry-go-round that I couldn't get off. But i did finally get off it almost 7 weeks ago and I love love love waking up ready for the day with enthusiasm and a smile.

My friends have commented on the new me saying things like, "you look so alive", "you're so much more lively" (spot the common theme?!).

Choose LIFE people. You can do it and you'll be so glad you did. (show me a post from anyone on this site that says they went back to drinking after a period AF and wished they'd relapsed sooner!).

STINKING THINKING: One drink won't hurt
Response: One drink will always hurt me and it always will be cause I'm not a social drinker. One sip and I'll be compulsively drinking again.

ST: I only want one
R: I have never wanted only one (so true ) In fact, I want 5 0r 10, every day. I want them all.

ST: I'll just be a social drinker
R: I'm a chronic compulsive drinker and once I drink one, I'll quickly be thinking about the next one. Social drinkers can take it or leave it. That's not me.

ST: I'm doing so well, one won't hurt me now (oh god....does this sound familiar?)
R: the only reason I'm doing so well is because I haven't taken the first one. Yet once I do, I won't be doing well anymore - I'll be drinking again.

ST: I'll just stop again.
R: Sounds easy but who am I trying to kid? Look how long it took me to stop this time? And once I start, how long will it take before I get sick enough to face the withdrawals again? In fact, when I'm back in the grip of compulsion, what guarantee do I have that I'll ever be able to stop again?

ST: If I slip, I'll keep trying.
R: If I think I can get away with one little 'slip' now, I'll think I can get away with another little slip later on (I've totally experienced this).

ST: I need one to get me through this withdrawal.
R: Drinking will not get me through the discomfort of not drinking. (I love that! It makes so much sense). It will only get me back to drinking. One sip stops the process of withdrawal and I'll have to go through it all over again.

ST: I miss drinking right now.
R: Of course I miss something I've been doing every day for most of my life. But do I miss the pain of drinking right now? Do I miss the shame, the embarassment? I'd rather be an ex-drinker with an occasional desire to drink than a drinker with a constant desire to stop doing it.

ST: I really need to drink right now. I'm so upset/angry/tired etc.
R: Drinking is not going to fix anything. I'll still be upset. I'll just be an upset drunk. I never have to have a drink. Drinking alcohol is not a need, it's a want. Once the crisis is over, I'll be relieved and grateful I'm still not drinking.

ST: I don't care.
R: WHAT IS IT EXACTLY THAT I THINK I DON"T CARE ABOUT? Can I truthfully say I don't care about my pain? I don't care about having a hangover in the morning? I don't care about what I'm doing to my liver, lungs, kidney and heart? I don't care about all the people I've hurt? No, I care about these things very much - that's why I stopped drinking in the first place.

ST: What difference does it make anyway?
R: It makes a difference in the way I live, the way my heart beats, the way I feel about myself. It makes a tremendous difference to every aspect of my physical and emotional health.

Big to all.
Bean
__________________
AF since 29/12/2010

I'd rather be an ex-drinker with an occasional desire to drink than a drinker with a CONSTANT desire to stop doing it.

[Doggygirl]

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My biggest enemy was DENIAL!!!

I've been thinking tonight about the role denial played in my alcoholism and my many years delay in admitting my problem, and taking action to stop drinking. It's absolutely horrifying to me that I could not see the obvious. I lied to others but mainly I lied to myself. In denial, I refusd to believe I'm addicted to alcohol. I refused to accept that the only solution for me is to NOT DRINK. I refused to accept responsibility. My excessive drinking (if it was indeed excessive) was due to other people or circumstances - not my fault.

Denial nearly killed me. Now I can look back and see the obvious. Now I can look back and see clearly the devastation that alcohol caused in my life. I'd have to be CRAZY to want to drink again. And yet for a long time after I stopped drinking, I entertained the fantasy that someday I could safely drink. More denial!!!!

Here is an article I thought was very good. If you are struggling to figure out if you really are alcoholic, and if so what to do about it, I hope you will read this. I hope you will be willing to open your mind and just entertain the possibility that alcohol needs to GO from your life. Alcoholism Drug Abuse Codependency Recovery Denial

I see now that alcohol added nothing positive to my life. All risk, and no reward. What a losing proposition. Finding my own way out has required me to open my eyes and stop living in the fog of alcoholic denial.

I hope you can find your way out too. Honesty, open mindedness, and willingness were the H.O.W. of it for me.

DG

[KundaliniGirl]

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A Technique You Might Want to Try

Hi Everyone - I have not tried doing this, but it sounds worthwhile. It's a technique that can help us all change our thinking. Here is an introduction. The link below the intro takes you to Dr. Mercola's website where he explains it in its entirety. And, you don't have to buy anything.

Thought it was worth posting. I'll also put it into the Toolbox Section.


What is the Emotional Freedom Technique?
The Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT, is the psychological acupressure technique I routinely use in my practice and most highly recommend to optimize your emotional health. Although it is still often overlooked, emotional health is absolutely essential to your physical health and healing - no matter how devoted you are to the proper diet and lifestyle, you will not achieve your body's ideal healing and preventative powers if emotional barriers stand in your way.

EFT is very easy to learn, and will help you:
?Remove Negative Emotions
?Reduce Food (Alcohol) Cravings
?Reduce or Eliminate Pain
?Implement Positive Goals
EFT is a form of psychological acupressure, based on the same energy meridians used in traditional acupuncture to treat physical and emotional ailments for over five thousand years, but without the invasiveness of needles. Instead, simple tapping with the fingertips is used to input kinetic energy onto specific meridians on the head and chest while you think about your specific problem - whether it is a traumatic event, an addiction, pain, etc. -- and voice positive affirmations.

For the entire article and instruction on how to do the technique, go to.........

EFT | Dr. Mercola’s Emotional Freedom Technique

KG

[being me]

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When I feel challenged I find logic solves everything. It is the conscious effort that needs to be exercised to put logic into place. Then it becomes second nature. Your idea falls into line the Buddhist philosophy. Thankyou WIP

[michaelsays]

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you guys are the best I have just got out of detox and am no going to continue in the program

[mario]

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When done michael ,hope to see you around here.

[mario]

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I have posted this a few times, I thing its brilliant.

There are 2 days in every week about which we should not worry

2 days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.



One of the days is YESTERDAY,with all its mistakes and cares,

its faults and blunders and its aches and pains.



Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control

All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday,

We cannot undo a single act performed,we cannot erase

a single word said.

YESTERDAY IS GONE



The other day we should not worry about is Tomorrow.



Tomorrow is beyond our control,it has not arrived.......yet,

Tomorrow,s sun will rise,whether in splendour or behind a

mask of clouds,but it will rise,until it does,we have no stake

in Tomorrow.

THIS LEAVES ONLY ONE DAY



TODAY

Anyone can fight the battles of just one-day, It is when you add the

burdens of those two awful days together

YESTERDAY & TOMORROW

That we break down.

LET US THEREFORE LIVE ONE DAY AT A TIME.



hope it helps.

[Rusty]

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Good Morning Mario,

Rusty O'Clock here in Wisconsin (4:30 a.m.). I just wanted to thank you for such a beautiful quote. It is soooo true and wished I had realized the futility of rehashing all the hurts and wounds I caused and other caused me in the past. This is a valuable lesson for all, even people who are not battling alcoholism. Thank you for printing it. I have put it in my MWO Folder....in the MARIO subfolder (very prestigious....almost as good as getting your name in the telephone book.:H) :h Thank you also for explaining to me what a "sticky" was.:l xo Rusty

[mario]

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Thats what we are all here for rusty, to help each other :-)

[coalfire]

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Strictly Optional: Weigh-In - Page 4

[one2many]

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Bump

[spacebebe01]

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A work in Progress, thanks so much for this thread it really has given me something to think about.