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Day 5!!!!

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    #1

    Day 5!!!!

    YAY! I slept last night. Asleep by 1130a, woke up at 330p, (because of all that water I'm drinking!!!) but right back to sleep and up at 6a! YAY ME AGAIN!!!!

    Last night, I took my daughter to dinner, where wine is served. I would normally have 2 glasses, but none for me. I actually thought about the possibilities, due to wine always with dinner, never an option for me, but thought "I'm with my daughter, and if I can't do it with her, I'll never do it in future adult situations." It was just fine. Did notice some wine glasses passing me by going to other tables, but wasn't dwelling on it.

    The best thing, we were able to make it to the grocery store after dinner. I never wanted to do much after dinner with her, because it would crimp my style of coming home for more wine before the buzz wore off. THEN!!!!! A better thing happened. I helped her study till 1030p! Thats always been a chore w/or w/out wine, because she knows EVERYTHING, and it sometimes gets tense while studying w/her. But I was able to be rational, realize that my aggravation would only magnify hers. We had a real moment of "normal" mom and daughter behavior!!!!!

    It's just so refreshing to wake up and realize no stupid arguements happened with her and knowing I was there mentally for her last night.

    Saying thanks again to all of you for being here for me, and listening. I haven't had any major "tests" yet, so I'm not gonna fool myself, but I'll take this moment and carry throughout my day today!
    "Be Kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
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    #2
    Day 5!!!!

    Pan, that is fantastic! I bet you woke up this morning and thought "that was very well worth the struggle!". Remember that at night, that the clear head and happy feelings are so much better than the temporary buzz. :l
    You, as much as anyone in the universe, deserve your love and respect. ~ Buddha

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      #3
      Day 5!!!!

      Panacea

      that is such a great post! Sleeping, dinner with your daughter, spending time with her afterwards ..... so what do you mean there were no great tests??! It sounds like you managed a great night without succumbing to normal (ie; alcohol ridden!) patterns. That's a test, even if there aren't dramas and lions thrown in .......

      Congratulate yourself on 5 days well done!!!!

      mame
      Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn

      Harriet Beecher Stowe

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        #4
        Day 5!!!!

        Thx river....I found myself feeling weird before I went to bed. Because I was clear headed!!! It was 11pm, and I thought I wouldn't be able to go to bed. I'm not tired from my wine buzz. I was bopping around the house doing "house" stuff that wouldn't even be a thought had I been drinking. Dishes would've stayed in the sink, finishing up some work, (I work from home) would have been TOTALLY out of the question, but I did last night.

        I have to admit, not having the ball of guilt and shame in the morning, as well as no hangover, is becoming quite addictive in itself!!!
        "Be Kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

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          #5
          Day 5!!!!

          Thx mame! You're right. Last night would've played out soooo differently had it been filled with wine, as it always has been. Thanks for your support and kind words!
          "Be Kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

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            #6
            Day 5!!!!

            FANTASTIC news! Soooo glad you got some sleep. What a difference a day makes huh? Keep on track & keep us posted
            xxx
            :sun:

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              #7
              Day 5!!!!

              That is great! There is something special about the absence of guilt. But also. I always had wine but alone (husband always gone). The past couple weeks for no reason I can see, he has been much sweeter. Maybe I have been nicer. It is hard to tell--hard to see oneself in the mirror sometimes. But I think maybe it was like you said with your daughter. My friend said maybe me being like I was, was why he always worked so late. What was he coming home to? It got me thinking. Maybe you and your daughter will have a way different relationship. I'll bet she slept a lot happier too.

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                #8
                Day 5!!!!

                Snowgoose;454894 wrote: That is great! There is something special about the absence of guilt. But also. I always had wine but alone (husband always gone). The past couple weeks for no reason I can see, he has been much sweeter. Maybe I have been nicer. It is hard to tell--hard to see oneself in the mirror sometimes. But I think maybe it was like you said with your daughter. My friend said maybe me being like I was, was why he always worked so late. What was he coming home to? It got me thinking. Maybe you and your daughter will have a way different relationship. I'll bet she slept a lot happier too.
                Quite the post! It hit home. Wine drinking makes me frantic, for lack of a better word. Everything had to be NOW, or its not happening. The slightest thing outta whack, I would turn into the wine filled bitch. Maybe with you, I know with me...I seem calmer, less crazy...still nuts mind you....but less!!!

                Quite a nice thought you had.....that my daughter slept alot happier too. I didn't think of the side of it, but I've been so full of my own drinking and guilt, I hadn't considered how she felt when she went to bed.
                "Be Kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

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                  #9
                  Day 5!!!!

                  Pan, that's wonderful. What a night and so many more to come!!
                  sigpic
                  Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT

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