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    #1

    Found the answer to my question... what now!

    So after 30 days AF i felt really REALLY lost in what i should do next. So stupidly i thought hmmm maybe i can mod now. SO one bottle of archers later, my answer to that is NOPE i can't. :upset:
    I drank way way to much, i didn't enjoy the feeling, went to bed mega early, house is a state, can't sleep, hate myself... the normal really after drinking. How can anyone enjoy this? How did i live my life feeling this way every day? It's crazy! Thank god i know how a sober life feels! SO back to being AF and i guess back to day one. I'm just worried that after each goal i set i'll feel as lost as i do now.

    ANYWAY, i feel much better now knowing i'm AF for the next 30 days again.

    SO here we go again!
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    #2
    Found the answer to my question... what now!

    (((((Michelle))))))

    Don't be hard on yourself! No one can ever take that month away from you. You still did it and you can again.

    Just remember you can do it!

    Christy
    AF July 6 2014

    Comment

      #3
      Found the answer to my question... what now!

      I know you feel like shit about it. We have all done it. The important thing is that now you know you can't mod. Don't beat yourself up about one day. You can beat yourself up if you do it again. Allow yourself the one free pass. Sometimes we need to be reminded of how bad the al really is. It's nice to hear that you are focused on anothe 30. Keep it up.
      Starting over again 09/06/11

      "When its good its good its so good until it goes bad" Pink,Sober

      sigpic

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        #4
        Found the answer to my question... what now!

        Michelle, you are on a journey, the road has twists and bumps, you have just hit a small pothole but are moving forward again. Well done!!!! I think we all feel lost sometimes and that sober life should be great. One 2 Many wrote an amazing post a week or so ago that sums it up beautifully. Think it was called Where Iam by O2m. Check it out it might help. As you have now commited to another 30 days, maybe you can start thinking of some other positve changes you can add to your life?
        Good luck hun, I am sure you will be fine
        Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
        Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

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          #5
          Found the answer to my question... what now!

          Michelle

          :h You have at least taken that amazing journey......... wow, it's inspirational. My journey is just beginning and I'm shit scared!!!!!!! Good Luck, you can do it!
          sigpic

          Comment

            #6
            Found the answer to my question... what now!

            Don't hate yourself! Treat it as a learning curve... you've learnt that you can't mod so embrace the AF-ness in you and go forward!
            "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

            Comment

              #7
              Found the answer to my question... what now!

              So, save this post you just wrote, LM, and at the end of the next 30 days, IF you really are beginning to wonder if it's OK to drink... read what you just wrote, OK?

              You're going to be fine. You know that you know how to do this, now! The experience that you just went through... being AF for 30 days and feeling good, and strong... will be something you can always draw on. I know that my own experience of having been AF for 3 years has been extremely helpful to me, this time around...

              wip

              Comment

                #8
                Found the answer to my question... what now!

                Hi Michelle
                Many of us, myself included, have had those hopes; that we could Mod after 30 days. It is a way of learning whether you can or not. I learned that there is NO WAY I can Mod, so I am with you sister. Chock it up to a learning experience and move forward. We are in this together, and we can do it. ODAT.
                "Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)

                Comment

                  #9
                  Found the answer to my question... what now!

                  Hope you can have a gentle day Michelle

                  I'm so glad you 'know how a sober life feels' & can use that to motivate you as you move forward again. If you felt lost after reaching the goal you had set, maybe try taking it one day at a time? Then maybe you'd have a daily feeling of achievement & success & could slowly tackle any other issues that need attending to on a daily basis also. Small achievable goals may work better.

                  Good luck & keep us posted (& hope you have put that big useless guilt-stick down!)
                  Gold
                  :sun:

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Found the answer to my question... what now!

                    Lil Michelle
                    Don't beat yourself up - it's just one slip - now you know you can't mod, keep going - you sound verypositive. I've just had (a few!_) slips away on holiday, after 54 AF days I drank again. As someone once said to me - i'ts just like if you are on a diet and doing well and you go to a birthday party and treat yourself to one slice of cake - you dont' think. oh well i've blown my diet now and go back to eating rubbish, it's just one slip and you carry on. This is just the same. Good luck and keep going - hopefully I can do the same.

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Found the answer to my question... what now!

                      Michelle....why don't you not set any goals.....you now know you can't mod, you don't like the way drinking makes you feel and think......so why not just change the mindset.....think of being AF as something that you are.....not something that you are doing for 30, 60, 90 days....

                      Don

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