Pregnant and struggling!

[notevergivingup]

Pregnant and struggling!

I hope this is ok to say, I worry a lot about offending anyone, but is there anyway you could check yourself in to a rehab, at least to finish out the pregnancy or stay away from any parties until after the birth. Just a thought, I wish you well and am praying for you.

Twosox :l

[islandofskye]

Pregnant and struggling!

Hi twosox, no offense taken, but rehab is out of the question as I have 2 little girls at home... I will try my best to avoid booze at all costs. Its very strange. I checked this thread about 2 hours ago and there was a very nice response from someone...then now its gone! It was from a senior member...just can't think of the name at the moment. Can posts be removed...? I wanted to respond to it, but now I can't..

[AAthlete]

Pregnant and struggling!

Yep - posts can be deleted by the original poster if they so choose.

Isn't it amazing the things that this disease makes us do? Someone without this problem would be horrified at this story - that you don't just stop for the sake of your baby... Truth is, once alcohol gets its grip on us, thinking of anything else at times can be close to impossible as your story shows. I couldn't tell you how many times I drove to the liquor store completely wasted with my son strapped in the back. Of course I justified it by saying the liquor store was only a couple of blocks away - what could happen in that short distance? Course if something would have happened I would never have forgiven myself.

Can I ask, have you read the book and incorporated any of the supplements into your program? I realize that being pregnant you have to be careful with what you take but at the end of the day I guess the supps would be better then the booze, right? The real key is to have a plan and the work it each and every day. Believe me, I've tried avoiding booze at all costs (white-knuckling it) and it would work for awhile, but I would always end up right back where I started. Just like everything else there is no magic pill here. It requires a lot of hard work, but it is possible to escape from this affliction.

Best of luck to you it what is obviously a very difficult situation.

[nancy]

Pregnant and struggling!

Welcome.

Sounds like you have a big problem on your hands. In the past, women have posted about drinking during pregnancy, not sure why you can't find those posts.

I think you need to be honest with your husband or partner and tell him what's going on. If he has to follow you into the kitchen so be it! It's his baby too and he can keep an eye on you and support you. You probably need to stay away from any parties or other temptation zones until the baby is born. Do you have a friend you can confide in?

There is also a group called Women For Sobriety that has a website and some face-to-face meetings. Maybe what you need is more support.

Nancy

[JAMMS]

Pregnant and struggling!

Islandofkye- I don't wanna seem like I'm any better then anyone, but I don't feel as if you are not going "out of your way" to not drink. You said you had 4-5 beers afew hefty glasses of wine and then finished off a bottle of bailiey's. Well, that is simply to much AL for your unborn baby.
I know others have asked you this question but I don'tknow htat you've answered have you read the book, or started sups? CD's..... something?
I struggle with this horrible addiction as well. I was AF for2 pregnancies and struggled with my 3rd. I had some wine in my 3rd trimester,but it sounds as if you are just going overboard. It is time you asked for additonal help for the sake of your child. Have you ever seen a baby born with AL addiction? It's awful!



Please,please,please.....get some help, tell someone about this, stay away from triggers. Stay on the boards... I'm sorry if I have come off rude or offensive or anything negative....I truly apologize. I'm worried about the baby inside you.

Again this post may sound harsh, I guess I'm just having a hard time with the circumstances. I know it's not easy to be AF. You definetly need talk wtih your DH or partner about this.

[nancy]

Pregnant and struggling!

Hi again

I was going to mention that sometimes when people post of drinking during pregnancies that the reaction can be harsh. People are worried about the baby.

You are welcome here and hope you get some support.

Nancy

[islandofskye]

Pregnant and struggling!

Hi Nancy, Thanks for your kind words. Yes I know people can be harsh...I guess that's the response I should expect, but I find it not beating me into shape. I KNOW I am f*cking up. BUT I also know I did very well for a long time. And I can go days and weeks without a drop. But being a binge drinker by nature...I fall into that trap too many times. Also thanks AAathlete for your kind words and your honesty too about your situation..(drinking and driving). So frustrating to feel so guilty and know how awful the behavior is and then REPEAT it! No I haven't checked out the book or CD or anything, but I think I will. I just wanted to get on the forum and chat with some people ASAP. Thanks!

[JAMMS]

Pregnant and struggling!

Islandofskye- Please do not think that I am not on your side. I AM on your side. Perhaps I'm not the best at articulating my thoughts. I'm concerned for you as well. Being a beinge drinker is the worst I know, (it takes one to know one). Perhaps my outburst was not encouraging. I'm sorry..... lets start over.:l

:welcome: Islandofskye- Be strong...if you have stopped drinking for long periods of time before, you have the strength to do it again. Everyone here will support you in through this very hard time. I will look for for some links that may help you. You can do this!
:l

[JAMMS]

Pregnant and struggling!

Drinking alcohol during pregnancy | BabyCenter

Tips for Giving Up Alcohol - March of Dimes

there are phone numbers you can call on each of these sites.... let me know what happens....don't be scard or ashamed give them a call see if they can help you too.
:l

[ezzmae]

Pregnant and struggling!

Island of Skye - I know that I am in Oz but the hospital where I had my baby also had an addictions clinic one day a week where pregnant women with addictions were seen by specialists to help manage the pregnancy. You should not be afraid to admit to your doctor or partner that you have a problem. Some many people suffer from various forms of addictions during pregnancy, your maternity specialists will know how to help you and your baby.

Good luck for the rest of your pregnancy.

[boozehag]

Pregnant and struggling!

Hi Isle
A friend of mine's 16 year old son has foetal alcohol syndrome and although he is an absolutely great kid that I love to bits he has a lot of struggles in his life as a result of this. He is behind educationally and struggles with memory - he does not retain information well and he has mild learning difficulties. His two brothers are tall and handsome and he is small and does not look like his family much as he has a small head and little eyes. These are apparently the signs of foetal alcohol syndrom. Most of us (including you I am sure) would die to save our kids from pain. To see this kid suffer because he is not quite the same as everyone else would put anyone off drinking. His mum was a binge drinker and he was born prematurely as a result. I cannot begin to tell you the guilt that she lives with when he comes home from school and ask why he is not the same as everyone else. It tears her up and I am sure she would not wish it on her worst enemy.
I am sure you will probably be fine and hope that you can hang in there for a few more weeks.
Stay strong.
BH

[veritas]

Pregnant and struggling!

Island, my heart goes out to you.

I want to urge you to let go of your secret. It sounds as though you have an understanding husband. If so, allow him to share your journey. Remember, your worst enemy right now is your shame. You cannot carry this alone.

When I told my family that I had a problem, they were extatic with joy. They knew it, and were worried sick about me. It was the silence that was keeping me from being open and honest.

[islandofskye]

Pregnant and struggling!

Thanks for your replies, some are very helpful and thought provoking. I have been very fortunate and hopefully I still am lucky that all my ultrasounds including one last, last week (29 weeks) have been absolutely normal. Normal size and everything. Yes, I am so aware of FAS and have probably read 1000 articles and spent 100s of hours on the internet reading about it. And of course that looms in my dark thoughts constantly. I will try to get my DH to talk tonight or VERY soon. Does anyone know of any chatrooms or forums for women with alcohol or addiction problems?? I wanted to get in a "group" of people with the same struggles (pregnant and struggling). Thanks all!

[Montana Mommy]

Pregnant and struggling!

I really hope you keep coming back here. Right now you are the person who needs this place the most urgent. Keep posting, keep reading. Keep fighting with this thing. I was in a similar situation while pregnant with my daughter almost 7 years ago, but with drugs. Keep reaching out. Have you tried joining the 30 days AF thread? I'll start a prayer chain for you. There is so much power in prayer.
MM

[MyHeartIsDrenchedInWine]

Pregnant and struggling!

I would get a friend or relative to watch your two little ones and spend the remainder of the pregnancy in rehab. They can bring your daughters to visit you. I know this sounds extreme but your disease is damaging a babies brain and nervous system. This damage is permanent while several weeks in rehab is temporary. My heart goes out to you and I will pray for you to have the strength to do the right thing.