Talking to myself

[vealees]

I am as savey on this computer as a cat in the bath tub! I keep posting to myself!!! Now dont get me wrong!! I am learning alot from Vealees! she cant spell, can be too silly on a board that is very serious, ( forgive me for that) but if I cant laugh a little with this, i'm afraid I'll never laugh again... So I am trying. Ijust dont want the great people who have responded to me to think I am a user. I am just an artist, and not used to playing THIS instument. So with that said, after 6 days of intence pride for myself, much introspection, making the people around me happy..........I had two beers..................I have to tell someone. The only thing that is saving me from kicking my ass( I do it brutaly) is that I had the option to have more and did not.....Actualy it gave me a headache......I write music and was at a friends house writing,who knows I have a problem. I think he thinks he can take care of me, you know, cut me off or baby sit.. I think I feel the same way, so it felt safe to do it. But I cant live there.( dont want to) I have to look out for the saboteur, that damagaing spirit that tells me it will be alright when it wont. I am not going to let this throw me. If I start denieing this, I will hit a dead end... I could have stopped on the way home and topped off my buzz, at one point I was going too. I did not. why, because I was sobber, still. Balieve me, after what Ive been drinking two light beers are like a whisper in a hurrican to me system... So the lesson? there is no safe place to drink, next time tell my friend that I have made a commitment. I have to tell people...........that I am an ALCHOLIC!!!!! and guess what? they already know. Hope this gets out....

[A Work in Progress]

Talking to myself

VL, yes this one got out! Good for you for your honesty, and for your insight into all this. And this forum isn't really so serious all the time... we have a lot of fun... check out the AF Army thread. If we were deadly serious all the time no one would want to stick around...

So you have already thought of some things you need to be doing differently... that's great. Keep doing that. And read the "toolbox" thread, I just bumped it up for Bunky. OK?

wip

[LookingToGrow]

Talking to myself

Hi VL!
Come chat with us on the AF Army thread! We're here to help and support you :wings:

[rubywillow]

Talking to myself

Welcome, VL! Love the cat in a bathtub scenario! Sort of the way I felt about quitting drinking til I found this place!!! Glad LTG invited you to Army. You and you're cat will fit right in!! LOL

[sunshine_gg]

Talking to myself

They already know....

You just hit my nail on the head :hitme: ummm.. hit my head with a nail? Well, either way...

Probably one of my biggest phobias... and why I'd SO much rather (eventually) mod than be AF... possibly having to explain WHY I don't drink. But, you said it rather eloquently, "they already know..." That thought alone makes me want to crawl under a rock