One Day At a Time Tuesday

[akgirl]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

periwinkle;465824 wrote: akgirl,

is your goal to abstain or to moderate? are you still listening to the cd's?

I am wrestling with that decision right now. I originally wanted to be AF for at least 30. Did well stringing quite a few AF days together with only minor slips. Now the past 4 days I have had a few each night. I am thinking mod might work better for now. I am just so damn happy not to be drinking 1-2 bottles a night anymore, and I hate beating myself up everytime I'm back on day 1. But then I feel like a loser for not being AF. I just don't know, but I guess maybe I should commit to one or the other and stick with it.

I have not been able to listen to the CDs like before, maybe that's why things are changing? My life is just crazy right now and I need to learn to handle stress better. Here in Alaska the onset of winter and the additional darkness plays mindgames and can be very depressing. But I am determined to stay focused on myself and my son and being healthy, happy and sober.

I will have to figure it out ODAT!!!

[SAUSAGE]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

Time2live welcome
Congratulations on 2 days AF - that's brilliant!
Don't worry about your sleep - your sleeping patterns sound exactly like mine - both when you were drinking (I too would wake about 2am and then finally fall asleep about 5am to feel exhausted in the morning). Each time I quit (and i'm on my 3rd serious AF stint) I've had terrible trouble sleeping the first few days - but STICK WITH IT - you are doing great, and you really will get there and become the energetic early riser that you want to be. Why not try starting your own thread on the new members bit - you'll get lots of support or alternatively join the daily abstinence thread in the monthly abstinence section (there's a new one each day always titled with todays date) there you'll meet other people trying to string AF days together.
Keep reading / posting and good luck on your journey
Sausage

[periwinkle]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

AK, I hear you. I have been (so far) doing well on my 30 day AF that I'm wondering now if I just want to keep it going and not try the mod route. Maybe some fear creeping in for me. It will probably change again in an hour or so LOL. I've had a couple rough emotional days, just a lot of tears today for I don't know why reasons. You know, just girly emotional stuff. Tomorrow will likely be different.

I love the cd's. Even though I don't get to them every day, I at least don't let more than 1 or 2 days go by. And I can almost always get in the subliminal cd. And I faithfully listen to the sleep cd every night.

Hope everyone is doing well.

periwinkle

[chiizus]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

ODAT makes it sound so easy. But no one else seems to see it that way. Bf is that way about alcohol as well as anything else I do to try to better myself. I go to the gym one day and am feeling all good about myself and thinking that maybe this good feeling will stick with me to start a positive habit... but then bf stomps on my happiness and tells me that "it's just one day" / "one time" / etc. and nothing to be proud of. It crushes me and breaks my heart.

[dlw]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

CONGRATS TO ALL OF YOU ON YOUR AF DAYS
Pat yourselves on the Back and keep up the good work

DLW
33 DAYS AF
33 DAYS Member MWO

[akgirl]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

chiizus;465915 wrote: but then bf stomps on my happiness and tells me that "it's just one day" / "one time" / etc. and nothing to be proud of. It crushes me and breaks my heart.

Not to be rude but doesn't sound like the best bf. We all know better, even one day is reason to be proud. One day will lead to two and so on. I could never get past one, the most I've done is 9...I'm back on day 1. Heck even cutting down in my opinion is a success to some degree. I think as long as you keep trying and don't give up on yourself.

:l to you
AK

[chiizus]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

Thanks. I know that, but it's hard to hear him act like it's nothing. I'm back on Day 1 right now and he told me last night that I had done so well but then I "had to go and ruin everything". He just doesn't see it the way we do. And it makes it hard to stay confident. Sometimes I feel like "then why even try?" He didn't used to be this way so much, but he's gotten frustrated (and with reason) and just doesn't believe in me anymore.

[akgirl]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

I'm sorry Chiizus, looking back that wasn't the nicest comment. He might be a great bf but like you said frustrated. Heaven knows what we put our loved ones through. Have you told him about MWO? How much of the plan are you doing? Maybe if he knew more about this, he would be able to support you more.

Just don't give up on yourself, no matter what. He will see that and come around.

:h PM me anytime
AK

[periwinkle]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

chiizus, how have things been for you?

I know a while back you were really struggling with him ratting you out with his parents. There was a huge lack of trust and things weren't going so well. I lost track of all that at some point.

If you want to get AF it needs to be for you. Not for bf or his parents or anyone else. My hubby doesn't really get it either. He is supportive to a point. But he still doesn't really get it. And ODAT is for us, not them - who ever "them" in our lives is.

Just some things to ponder.

Hang in there.

periwinkle

[lulubell]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

I have the same Issue

:new: I understand chiizus my BF is supportive but just doesn't get it completely and yes when I go to the gym I want some praise and instead get it's just a day you need to commit! Which is true, but tough love is tough, when you are already tough on yourself for everything. I'm doing so much better than I was, but not 100% , but for him he doesn't see the progress until it's complete, he doesn't understand the ONE DAY AT A TIME concept, so it's difficult. I know it's because he cares and he does try to be supportive, but he doesn't get the struggle.

[periwinkle]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

Aww... Lulu,

We all need praise. It's wonderful to get praise from anyone we can get it from. But that's not the reason that we should be doing something great for ourselves. I don't go to the gym, but I do go to yoga classes. I totally don't go to get a pat on the back from my hubby, I'd never go again! I go because of how great I feel afterward. And that makes me want to go again. I don't think he has ever told me he was proud of me for doing that! I'm somewhere in my third week AF and I think I've gotten one "I'm proud of you Babe" from hubby. I don't expect it from him. He doesn't get it. He doesn't have a problem with drinking. I come here to the forum if I need that praise and encouragement. We get it, we have the same struggles as you!

Where are you with your drinking? What is your plan? Tell us your progress. We will give you the encouragement you need and rightly deserve. Even if it's only one day or one hour!

periwinkle

[lulubell]

One Day At a Time Tuesday

Thanks Periwinkle! I know it takes others in the same situation to truly understand, so being here really helps! I've come a long way since I've joined about a month ago and though I'm not 100% af I am going many days af (I've actually only drank moderately 5 days since Oct 27th) so I'm getting there! I'm doing the Sups and topamax and just ready to reclaim my life. I do have a very lovely but judgemental bf though. My motivation to workout isn't for him I know it's good for me and will help me be healthier so I will go to the gym for me (btw I love yoga and pilates), but it's hard when he get's harsh on me and I"m by no means big (5'7" 140, just need to tone up a bit). He's the same about drinking he doesn't get that it's a struggle not just an easy decision I make. But anyhow thanks for the support.