CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

[dlw]

:goodjob:

DLW

34 days af

[startingover]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Change that is amazing!! Well done!

[notevergivingup]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Awesome!!

Twosox

[changemylife]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Thank You :thanks: :thanks: :thanks: :thanks:

My wife didn't even realize it's been 60.

I hit my second goal. I am leaving for vacation Sunday.
I can now go away with a clear head and make rational decisions.

I need to set my next goal.

[Guest]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

fair play to you Change. thats brilliant!

[greeneyes]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Yippee!!!!! Congatulations!!

[tlrgs]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

great job keep up the good work...

[A Work in Progress]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

CONGRATULATIONS!!! Good for you, very good indeed!!

wip

[cmhguy3]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Awesome!

[Peacefull]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Way to go!!!!!!!!!

[BecomingMeAtLast]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Congratulations! :happy:

[changemylife]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Thanks everyone, I know this is a happy thread but I'm upset. I'm not only trying to do everything right, I am doing almost everything right.

I'm eating healthy... I'm down to my playing weight when I was in high school.
I'm happy and less stressed.
I'm kicking ass at work.
Sleeping well.
Working around the house.
Spending less money. (mostly from no AL)
My relationships with my family and select friends is great.
My Pop is doing 100 times better now that we know what he has and is on
the right meds.
I am able to deal with social situations better with less anxiety.
All around so much better without AL

The problem is I'm lonely. I spend a lot of time with my wife and we have a great relationship. We are the best of friends.

The problem is intimacy. I am a very sexual person and have been shot down so many times that it really takes a toll on me. I'm to the point where I don't know what to do. I think we average once a month and it’s only because of me. She doesn't ever initiate and when we do it, there is no romance and foreplay. I have tried everything over the years and am starting to give up again.

This is the one thing that would make my life complete and truly be happy.

I have used AL in the past to numb my feelings but Al is gone now.

Any suggestions would be appreciated. I really am happy it’s just this one thing that makes me feel so lonely at times.

Am I wrong? Am I asking for too much? Is this not important?
My wife completely ignores me every time I bring it up.

Sorry for venting and being a wuss

[startingover]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Hiya Change. I am not sure I have any words of advice for you but I really do sympathise.
When you talk to her do you pick your moment well i.e. when you are both feeling close and comfortable? Not when there is any angst? I think (and maybe you have done this already) that you need to stress to how important this is to you. Even more so without the alcohol.
Women are different as you know, they are more body conscious, have more hang ups usually and it can be a number of things that "put us off" when under stress, sex is the first thing to go which is a shame as it is probably the best thing for relaxation.
What about just getting close without full sex? would she go for that for a while? maybe she feels under pressure for some reason? I dont know, I am just throwing some thoughts out to you.
Sometimes it needs some intense understanding to get on the right track again.
I wish you all the luck in the world because relationship issues can be the worst things to make you unhappy. Just remember though, dealing with them sober is so much better than when inebriated.
Best wishes Change. I am sure you will work this out.

[changemylife]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

Thanks Startingover, I never thought to express that it is even more important since I am Sober.

I agree that dealing with it sober is paramount. It will work out for a short periiod of time. She will understand and things will change for the weekend and then go right back until I say something again. This is why its only once a month if that. Its cycle

[startingover]

CONGRATS CHANGEMYLIFE 60 DAYS AF

When you were drinking did your wife get angry with you? Did you stop for short periods because she said something and then it would recede in both your minds and you would start again?
I might be way off the mark here and if so just ignore me but.....
Maybe you need to talk about it and remind each other or you remind her more often than once a month? As you know, change and habits take time to settle in. Sex is no different, its a habit we get into and can be either a frequent or infrequent habit...