Tough start of AF # 4

[JAMMS]

Tough start of AF # 4

Sorry

Just woke up, Hubby took the kids to school/sitter this morning and I called in sick. Went overboard a little last night. Feel like crap. Day #1 till the 19th, office party, where I will definelty mod.

Sorry if I let anyone all down by going over my MOD drinking limit last night. Not to worry though, I'm am eating a turkey sandwich right now with a cup of green tea and I took my kudzu, my brain focus and my lexapro.....(first I had to take an alka-seltzer). I'm going to pick up my litle ones and coming home to make my 17 year old his favorite meal, eggplant parmagian. He's got a cold and he's a litle pissed at me for last night. I have to kiss some butt now.

Did a lot of talking with the "bad influence" and my Hubby. Hubby is getting real supportive. He knows my plan to be AF until the 19th, so does cousin; he is going to be AF with me until the 19th.
:l

[BecomingMeAtLast]

Tough start of AF # 4

Jamms,

I remember a few months back when I first went over my mod amount. I apolozied for it here and was so down on myself. Someone here sent me a nice PM and told me not to get so down on myself, to focus on how far I'd come and how much I'd accomplished. That PM really helped me.

I guess I'll say the same to you. It happens, right? I learned a lesson that day and it sounds like you did, too. Your son sounds like mine, very smart! Your hubby sounds awesome, that's great. The support is wonderful.

Take care, thanks for being so honest. It's tough to do. :l
Be

[gyco]

Tough start of AF # 4

you teach,wow, what do you teach,health and phs ed, hahaha,im bein sarcastic,i amsorry yur havin a ruff time,it does pass,about a month,there all lying including me it will take a life time to get back the old you,if youve done somthing realy bad well it could last for ever,we wont go there,then theres chrisitmas,around the corner,this place will be intresting,who will fall, i didnt say fail,or not,who will be naughty or nc, hahhaha again,on a brighter note we here at MWO wil stand by you no matter what,and yes if you want to send this crazy jok in the quiet zone,all keep yur secret hahha,gyco

[JAMMS]

Tough start of AF # 4

:thanks:

Thank you Be- I will take your advice and focus on the fact that I did get through some "trigger" nights. An accomplishment for me and there will be more. I feel a lot better this evening. I was more mad at myself earlier, my "hangover" was anxiety and horror free so it's good that those feelings were not a part of my "the day after".

Gyco- :thanks: for your support too.

[healthypaw]

Tough start of AF # 4

Jamms--It is good that you are getting support from those around you. That is a great thing. Just take a look at the whole picture and move on from there. Just think how many times you would have gotten druck if you didn't start this. Work on the positives. Then try to get better. I think you are doing great.

Jamms you bring up a good point about the times that we fail and what we learn from them. Right now I am afraid to take that first drink. Not knowing what will happen. Day 20 and I still not sure what will happen when I have that first beer.

Here is to a productive hopefully AF weekend.

[JAMMS]

Tough start of AF # 4

Paw- Thanks for the boost of confidemce. I look forward to hearing from you every timeI sign on here. Your a great pal. Are you planning to go have a "first beer" any time soon? Are you tryng 30 days AF and then Mod? What is your plan? How are things at home? Was that to many questions?

Day #2 is better then yesterday..I'm not at all anxios or mad at myself anymore. I got a busy day a a head of me.

:thanks:

[healthypaw]

Tough start of AF # 4

Jamms, It is always good to see updates on how you are doing. I am trying to go for 30, but next Saturday, which is day 28, People are going over from my work. That could be very hard. I have been thinking about how I want to approach that, I was hoping to hold out until new years eve. My family life is great, my wife and I are growing closer and my kids are great. I'm basically learning how to live my life again.

Still Healthy.

[motoxgal]

Tough start of AF # 4

Paw, you are doing such a great job. You sound so healthy and strong, a real inspiration. Been reading your posts from the start and you sound better and better every time. I enjoy reading your posts and Jamms as well.
Jamms - don't beat yourself up - same thing you told me the other day when I fell down. Stuff happens - kissing butt is a normal in my household and eating a little crow never hurt anyone either. Pick up and continue your goal, you can do it!

[JAMMS]

Tough start of AF # 4

paws- I'm very happy that your family life is progressing and going well. When we first "met" we were kinda in the same boat with the spouses, I'm real glad that area in both of our lives is going good. It makes AF and Mod a bit smoother. I know exactly how you feel in regards to next Saturday, I can tell you that the kudzu really does help. I've also noticed that it is easier to control the urges in a social setting when it's not in my own house. That's just me. If you do end up drinking AL , try to have limit set for the night, drink water between AL and eat. It worked for me on Thanksgiving. Try not to do what I did on Wednesday.

Mo- Ironic that it was only hours after I told you that,.... I was drinking. WTF was I thinking! I was happy to be there for you then and I'm happy that you are here for me now. :l

[healthypaw]

Tough start of AF # 4

moto- I appreciate the kind words. I am real cranky today because college football has big day and I usually associate that with drinking. I went grocery shopping and got a 6 pack of O douls- Hope that help me get through. How's it going for You? Any big holiday parties(I would say christmas but have to be politically correct)

Jamms- Thanks for the idea of water in between drinks, I may do the o douls- maybe a 2 odouls then 1 beer and try that. I hope you and your Hubby cuddle up to a nice weekend and perhaps a little hanky panky. My wife is going out tonight with a friend so I will watch some football and proably run

[JAMMS]

Tough start of AF # 4

day #5 woo hoo!!!!!

Hi everyone....I had a busy weekend. How was yours? Day #4 was easy yesterday...even though I did not have a good football day....the Jets lost, whatever! Washington got killed...(not a redskin fan, but the cousin is) so the AL was flowing in his room. I stayed away from him.


Tonight the family is going to decorate for x-mas and put up the tree.

[healthypaw]

Tough start of AF # 4

Jamms-- Love putting up the christmas tree, with a 6 and 3 year old it is a lot of fun. Jets looked horrible, favre starting to look very old. Good work staying away from cousin!!!

On day 23 here, Saturday still looming big. Also tooting my own horn have lost 16 pounds during these AF days.

Stay Strong

[JAMMS]

Tough start of AF # 4

Paw- I can't wait to se my baby's face when she sees the tree, last year she was only 5mos old. Hubby dresses up as Santa every x-mas eve, I wake my younger son to "peek" at santa... I don't know about this year....he keeps asking if he's real! YIKES!!! I told him that Santa elves do not make "Bakugan" and that's all he wants this year, that and those night vision goggles...

Congrats on losing 16pounds......I can't seem to stop eating! I'm starting to gain. DOUBLE YIKES!!!

[healthypaw]

Tough start of AF # 4

Damn-- Does that mean that Santa Elves don't make snowmobiles either. How did the tree decorating go? I'm sure is was a ball. Have an excellent day. Keep up the good work

[SpiritGirl]

Tough start of AF # 4

Hi... thought I would jump on this thread, as it sounds like a lot of you are where I am.. I am on Day 5. I have had many falls. Still standing today though. Longest I've been AF in the last 3 years is about 25 days. If a drink one glass of wine, I drink the bottle. I never used to be this way. Today I will struggle - my twisted mind will tell me "You've HAD 5 days off, one glass of wine won't hurt...." thus the vicious cycle will start. I write this KNOWING what can/will happen if I open up the bottle, yet still will contemplate it.

I guess thats why I am here today. I took a break from MWO and really started to geet back into old regretful habits. I really don't want that impending hangover!

Paige