AF December - Monday, December 1

[keepwalking]

AF December - Monday, December 1

jls10;482112 wrote: Good Morning,
I've tried this before, but convinced myself that I'm OK and here I am back again. Fortunately, for me, nothing awful has occurred to bring me here yet (besides not being the best mom or person I can be, and a 75 lb weight gain of course) but I'm so sick of the struggle. Yesterday I didn't drink- probably the first day in months- and I haven't gone more than a week not drinking since my daughter was born (7 years ago). Anyway, I got through it, and here I am sober and well rested, on a Monday morning, the first day of December. I am lucky in that all it takes is a day for me and I start feeling like my old self. I sleep well, start losing weight, lots of energy. I mean, the cravings are there BAD, but I don't physically feel bad. But by day 4 or so, I decide I want to drink and in a split second, I 'm drinking. I don't want this to happen this time. I'm not at the point where I can say I'll NEVER drink again. But I want to take it one day at a time and really give it a great shot. I've read so many books about AL for women, been to AA meetings, I write my journal, I found this great board, I have the tools, now it's up TO ME> I want to do it for me and for my girls, they deserve a better me, a better role model. I'm afraid that as my daughter hits her teens she start drinking herself after seeing me do it so much.

Anyway, I feel GREAT this morning. I miss feeling sober and free in the morning like this. I'm going to go on the treadmill, go to work, and do all I can to stay busy tonight so I'm not faced with the cravings as bad. I want to wake up tomorrow feeling like this again, and the next day and the next day...It's amazing when we're drinking that we don't really face how awful we feel. I wouldn't necessarily be hungover everyday (my tolerance in combination w/my weight helps I'm sure) but I would not feel great, slugglish, guilty, not a clear mind at all, and of course, wanting to drink again in some strange way.

I know I can do this---it's great knowing there are other people out there going through it, or have been successful and being able to connect and get inspiration. I can't share this with anyone in my everyday world.

Are you taking any anti craving supps to help?

[redhibiscus]

AF December - Monday, December 1

I'm going to try AF December

I have been lurking around this site again and want to make a commitment to stay AF in December. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. I notice that I have the same pattern as others - AF Monday through Friday and drinking and feeling horrible all through the weekend. I even thought of getting a weekend job to stop this stupid and destructive pattern. So......I am going to commit and participate instead of just reading everyone else's efforts to be real and make positive changes. Everyone on this site is great and I really appreciate reading about other's struggles as I can relate. Good luck to all of us and may this December be the best of our lives.

[greeneyes]

AF December - Monday, December 1

I'm in! I felt like a drink yesterday and simply found it annoying. Not tempting as I didn't dwell on it. I just recognized it and thought "Grrrr.... go away you feckin' gobshite! I don't have time for thoughts of your likes!"

[LookingToGrow]

AF December - Monday, December 1

It is wonderful to see so many onboard for a December to remember! :lilangel:
I know everyone is busy with their responsibilities of life, but I do encourage y'all to read and post as much as you can. We seem to have alot of similar patterns/habits. I am hopeful that going forward we can share with each other our plans for remaining AF ODAT. In the past we have had many wonderful threads to help us all get going on our journey to sober living. I will try to keep some of them bumped up for us all. If anyone is struggling, please give us a shout out at any time. Looking forward to getting know everyone this month and beyond :h

[A Work in Progress]

AF December - Monday, December 1

What a FANTASTIC start to this thread! Obviously it was a great idea, KW, and thanks to you and LTG for getting it going, You have drawn a wonderful crowd!

December has always been a difficult month for me. I don't get all cheery around Christmas-time. And I know I'm not alone in that... plus there is WAY too much drinking involved in holiday parties. Makes it so hard to stay AF even for folks who love the holidays.

Many of you are fairly new here so I'll tell you that I am a 56-year-old woman, and I have been drinking very heavily for most of my adult life. I did 3 years of sobriety in AA, and a few other times I have quit (without AA or other support) for up to a year. Always went back to it, though... this time I am extremely determined and committed to NEVER going back to using alcohol. It is not just a dead end... for me it actively destroys my life. Or, rather, I destroy my own life, by drinking. My father was an alcoholic; he ended up attempting suicide a couple of times, and finally succeeding, by walking out his back door, and shooting himself. Just a day before, I had invited him to come to an alcohol treatment facility near where I live...

Life without alcohol is totally different for me; not perfect, and not joyful all the time, but clear, and steady. My mind is not full of despair and misery and fear. I know that I can do whatever I need to do, today, and I know that I will enjoy and take satisfaction in the things that are meaningful to me. I know that I will not humiliate or otherwise hurt myself, or anyone else, today. I'll do whatever it takes to keep the alcohol out of my life.

Everyone, have a good December! Read the "tool box" thread, if you have not already; read it again, if you have (it's the first thread in the "Monthly Abstinence" section). Check out the tools on the SMART Recovery website, too; they are very helpful.

wip

[raineyjane]

AF December - Monday, December 1

hi all, yes I'm still here! I ha e been going to rehab for about 6weeks. I am very lucky,the place I found is awsome! I have had some slips,but nothing like what I would have done if on my own. I'm taking antibus it works for me by taking the, should I what if out of the picture. I wish everyone a safe and happy dec 1.
Raineyjane

[LookingToGrow]

AF December - Monday, December 1

Hi RaineyJane! Wishing you a safe and happy December 1 as well :lilangel:
Mine began with a beautiful, lightly cloudy sunrise over the metroplex. It's so nice to get up before the sun these days :h

[New Day]

AF December - Monday, December 1

I'm in! The start of a new month on a Monday morning. I want so much to get past 4 days AF. That seems to be my stumbling block, and then I give up trying over the weekend, and start AF on Mondays. I want this month to be different. Maybe I should think of being AF for December as a Christmas gift to myself.

[kriger]

AF December - Monday, December 1

I'm In too. A nice, clear headed holiday season sounds perfect to me!
New Day, An AF December would be a GREAT gift to yourself! Let us help you thru day 4,5,6 and 7 then on to 31 full days without AL. Do you have all the AL out of your house? That is always a good start.
Krigs

[LookingToGrow]

AF December - Monday, December 1

New Day, we are calling this a December to remember. As Kriger stated, getting the AL out of the house is the best step 1. Let us help you with overcoming the weekends, okay? We can start your plan today for the weekend - so that's 4 days against 3. We win :lilangel:

[New Day]

AF December - Monday, December 1

No Krieger --- lots of AL in the house ... we have a full bar and a small wine cellar. With the holidays coming up and company coming, I'll still have to have it available for others. And far to much $ invested to toss it all out. I will just have to learn how to deal with staying AF with it around. It's all around when we go out of the house anyway .. restaurants, other people's houses (especially all the Christmas parties happening at this time of year).
Was at a party on Saturday night and hubby handed me a glass of wine (he doesn't know of my struggle to want to stop)... and a little while later came over to me with another glass, but surprise, surprise ... I hadn't finished the first one ... and ended up not finishing it ... switched to water. I guess when we arrived home, I was so happy with myself at how I didn't drink like I used to that I poured myself a congulatory glass of wine ... and then another and another... Then I wasn't happy with myself anymore.... not sure why I do that. It's a problem I'm going to have to solve.... and I'm determined to.

[New Day]

AF December - Monday, December 1

Thanks for the support LTG and Kriger. I will work on a plan for the weekend (that seems to start Thursday evenings!)

[Seacailin]

AF December - Monday, December 1

What a great thread KW and LTG
Thank you. So great to see some people that I have not had the pleasure of meeting. I had the same pattern for awhile; 4-5 days AF, then Bamm!! Now I try to surround myself with sober people when I have time off from work. It has been working. Stay strong!!

[SAUSAGE]

AF December - Monday, December 1

Great thread ! I'd like to join in too!

I've been AF this year for all of Sept, 24 days out of Oct, all but the first 2 days of November and now i'm going for my first ever alcohol free December!!

It's going to be tough but I want to do it!!

This time last year I was drinking every day - I only made an effort to stop in January . It's tough at times and December is going to be a hard one, especially Christmas day but I'm feeling positive.....

[LookingToGrow]

AF December - Monday, December 1

Sausage, welcome to a December to remember! It will be a first for me as well. Are you going to be tweeking your AF plan in any way? I know I need to get out of the house more but my shopping trips to the mall are getting expensive. So, today I will call a neighborhood church and volunteer for the Clothes Closet and Food Pantry. Anyone care to join me in your neighborhoods?