I can't believe it....I got drunk again. I am so disappointed in myself. I just...I don't even know what to say. Nobody really noticed because it was just me being me. Only you guys know that I acknowledged a problem with drinking. Advice anyone. I was determined to change but like someone said to me it's a long road, intentions and the thought of it is easy. Sticking with it is hard! I want to be free of this drinking shit, I hate my behaviour....It makes me ugly.....I feel kinda numb.....
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I did it again....
:upset:
I can't believe it....I got drunk again. I am so disappointed in myself. I just...I don't even know what to say. Nobody really noticed because it was just me being me. Only you guys know that I acknowledged a problem with drinking. Advice anyone. I was determined to change but like someone said to me it's a long road, intentions and the thought of it is easy. Sticking with it is hard! I want to be free of this drinking shit, I hate my behaviour....It makes me ugly.....I feel kinda numb.....Tags: None
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I did it again....
((( Ova )))
I know exactly how you feel, as I did it again as well
For NO good reason whatsoever (as if there ever was one)... and now swallowing the guilt and shame again.
But, no matter what, I'm picking myself up again today. And tomorrow. And the day after. We have to keep trying.Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?
Winning since October 24th, 2013
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I did it again....
Yep, you're right. I looked at pictures of my kids today and just fee so sad that there are time when I can't remember stuff. It's actually worse now, my memory has definitely been affected by AL does this improve over time as you remove AL from your life? Does anyone know?
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I did it again....
Hi Ova
Maybe AL knows you are planning on getting it out of your life so its trying to squeeze a few last goes out of you. See its scared and soon it will be on the run! Its very hard to do cold turkey and thats why we are all here. Get yourself a start date and gather all the tools you can muster and then go for it. If you dont feel strong enough to do it before xmas then you could go for Jan 1 2009. A new year and new life! Go on you know you dont want another year of feeling like shite.
The fog so totally lifts you will get your brain cells back (well most of them anyway).
BH
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I did it again....
Hey Ova
Thats my "before" picture of my stomach's as I am now in training for a mini marathon (really teeny weeny tiny one) next year with a few other MWO'ers. And I cant claim credit for the dog day - thats copyrighted to Bessie on the ODAT thread. Royalties coming soon Bessie!
How are you feeling now Ova?
BH
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I did it again....
OK. Hope I didn't offend you..... Good luck with that marathon. I did a duathalon I can't believe I actully completed it, given I had such a bad hangover! I felt really sick once I had done it....Couldn't tell anyone that I had a mean hangover, well my family that is, my two younger (non AL issues) sisters and mum were also competing. Still numb probably the hangover I've got right now. But very happy to be able to be honest and discuss how I am feeling - it lessons the load......The encouragement is great and unconditional....really
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I did it again....
Ova, do you have a solid plan for your recovery program? Using the stuff in the "tool box" thread? It's very hard to succeed unless you put together a good plan, get some structure, some goals, some changes in your life. Part of it is looking at whatever it may have been that triggered the last lapse... and how to avoid, deal with, or work around that trigger... and others.
best wishes,
wip
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I did it again....
You're right sea - I am not going to kill myself over my stumble last night - I did pretty much pick myself up this morning and started my plight once again. There is still a chance for a strong December, not a perfect one, but strong for sure! Today is a new day. I'm still worth working for. No justification or rationalization for what I did. I do need to think about the triggers and focus on how I can stop the stinkin thinkin when it starts - before it progresses into the fall.
Hang in there Ova it, WE CAN DO THIS!!!!!
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