Please, just help

[veritas]

Please, just help

I managed the family meal without any wine

Later arrived home and was reminded that I promised to go with my son to listen to is girlfriend singing.... in a pub:egad: worse still the girlfriend's mum, who will also be there is known to be able to knock a few back.

I am praying that I make it through the night. A few nights ago, this would have been an excuse for a real piss up, now I am really anxious.

[startingover]

Please, just help

Hi Veritas, you have come a long way from a couple of days ago, you are sounding great!
I know how you feel about going out because yesterday I went to my first Christmas do sober! It was a huge challenge for me, people i didnt know, people i did and lots of booze... a friend sent me a text saying "tonight you will conduct yourself with class and dignity"
When I read that I had a mind shift and realised that yes, I would. I even enjoyed myself too, it was different but it was good.
Read your posts at the beginning of this thread too, that will show you how depressed you get when drinking too.
Be strong my friend, you can do this and this is something that you WON'T regret in the morning.

[neurogenic]

Please, just help

Hi Veritas,

welcome, Im also new here, so far doing ok. You sound really strong and I think you have done a wonderful job on getting here, getting through the first few victories and also got yourself a great thread going. I'd say thats a major achievement! I think you have made a conscious dicision and you seem determined. Im on the dry for a while to clear my head and sort out what I need to do. Two weeks today, never done that before. I have also done this whilst frequesnting the pubs, restaurants etc with all my friends drinking. I need to let them drink, they dont have problems, I do. Mine mostly with 'control'. I hope you made it to the bar with your son, I think there are times when we can put ourself in these kind of positions and be strong, and for the times that we cant, just do something else.

Good luck with it, and keep visiting, many wonderful people here, even if we all have our own personal ugly friends and demons, mine is also white wine! With so many women here having wine "problems" I'm beginning to think there are some serious wine chemicals just egging us along. Definitley not an excuse, far from it, just my scientific mind overworking before bed on a sunday night.

On that note, nite all, newbies and not so newbies

[veritas]

Please, just help

Starting Over, thanks for the advice to read my original post. I really was a lump of misery.uch: I don't want to go there again.

Strangely enough, I was thinking of how much I am dreading Christmas, then I remembered.. last Christmas I had passed out soon after lunch. My children thought that I was bored with a DVD they were watching. I went to bed woozy headed and woke up the next day feeling like hell.

I am not dreading New Year. I stayed at home last New Year's eve and did my own thing... sober. Next morning I got up at dawn and went for a walk. My head was clear and I was so happy with myself and filled with hope.

Neurogenic, thanks for your support. I don't feel very strong.:no: I know that I cannot trust myself right now. I am imagining myself enjoying the evening just listening to music and sipping juice.

I am going to have a biiiiigggg glass of milk before I leave. It's summer here in South Africa and a very humid and hot day. I need not to be tempted by thirst.

[startingover]

Please, just help

Another thing that helps me is to eat. If I have a full tummy it stops those urges too. Others have said the same...Imagining yourself how you want to be is excellent...you will get stronger

[veritas]

Please, just help

I made it

I am here, after a sober evening, clear headed and happy.
I found it very hard at first and really missed the high. I really do get a very wonderful high. I think that I found it easier not to drink, once people around me started to get silly with booze. It wasn't that funny at all. I just wanted to go home and read a book.

I knew, only too well, that that could have been me :blush:

Wally22, thanks for your warning. I will be honest, had I not logged in before I went out last night and done some reading, I would not have managed. The little gremlin addict in my head would have won me over with many a rational argument..
It would have said, "don't be silly to start now, you are setting yourself up for failure. Wait until the festive season is over". That little gremlin is just so crafty.

I know that I would not have made it were it not for this forum.:thanks:

[startingover]

Please, just help

Veritas, you are a STAR!!!
So proud of you!
Thats exactly it, you might not get those highs but they come in other ways, real ways, you know genuine satisfaction for something that you do or happens.
You are on your way now!!

[Fidel]

Please, just help

Veritas, howzit !!!

Welcome ... when I saw you put the 'R' in front of figures when you were talking about money, I knew that we live in the same country.
I read all your posts on this thread, and I've seen a remarkable change in your attitude over 3 days.... well done!!

I'm on Antabuse, and 19 days AF now. The AB gives me absolutely no choice. I now go into pubs ( my social centres ), and don't even think of alcohol. I wouldn't have believed I could do that 3 weeks ago.
OK, my dr's appointment cost R200, and the my first 30 days of AB was R368. ( I have 2 more repeats ). After 10 days, my nauseousness got worse after the AB, so now I have one every second day.... In my mind, that still 100% effective. So, 3 Month's supply total cost is R752, or R8.36 a day ( less than 1 beer in a pub a day ).
But, you seem to be doing pretty well without it.... excellent!!

Are you in the same city as me?

[johnnyh]

Please, just help

Hey SA guys.

I was prescribed to take one pill a day by my doc and paid R230 abouts for 15. After 2 days decided to cut down to half a day to make the 15 last for the month. That's affordable in comparison to what I would spent on drinks.

I also found that the tabs make my stomach a bit upset so reason number 2 to take half a tablet only.

But I feel your pain. I'm on medical aid (discovery) and they won't contribute a cent. Which seems stupid to me seeing that I am a much lower risk to them not drinking.

[veritas]

Please, just help

Johnnyh, I agree 100% about Discovery. They are prepared to pay for liver transplant, car accidents, cirrosis and.. and .. and.. but not for something that is going to prevent all of this. It's something about not paying for anything that's self inflicted.

It's as if everyone is off on the first drink, saying, "I'm going to knock this back, because all I want to be is an alcoholic' I really have a problem with the self inflicted bit.

Fidel, pleased to meet you
Nope I am not from your beautiful city. I do know your city well, half of my city has packed up this weekend and left for your city:H:H

I've had a few cravings today. Maybe because I have been running around and not taking care of my fluid intake. I went to the local Pick and Pay and the wine shelves seemed to be saying:welcome:

Eishh, that is a path I have tread just too often.

[johnnyh]

Please, just help

Hi Veritas.

Exactly. Especially take into consideration that they take care of your gym membership at Virgin Active etc. so that you can get healthy (and you might well not be because you are overweight.)

So I don't quite understand their logic. In the same way they have just covered a gastric bypass surgery for my aunt (well..... 75% of it.) Because she is overweight.

Well anycase. will have to live with it.

Hopefully you'll manage to come down to CT soon! The weather is an absolute stunner at the moment!! If I wasn't working I'd be lying on the beach every day.

[Fidel]

Please, just help

JohnnyH,
Howzit !! good to meet you here...

Veritas, I know the feeling ........ I had a good laugh when I read an observation that someone else posted on this forum. he said that "He was living in fear after he stopped drinking that a bottle would jump off the shelf and plunge intself into his mouth, but he soon realised that wasn't going to happen."

You seem to be doing well. Cool.

[DeeBee]

Please, just help

So this is where all the South African's hang out...lol!!

Veritas, I just wanted to say a huge WELL DONE!! When in doubt, read your last couple of posts. You really sound like you on a high, without AL!!

[veritas]

Please, just help

DeeBee, thank you.
I remember that you were one of the first to repond to my rather drunken call for help.

This is now my forth day. I am really find that logging on helps the cravings. My biggest problem has always been this horrible little gremlin that I have on my shoulder.. it whispers sweet nothings and tells me exactly why it is ok to start tomorrow..

I am doing a lot of soul searching and realise that the alcohol has kept me back from so much. It has been the biggest cause of my procrastination, something that has kept me away from being truly successful.

[Fidel]

Please, just help

Ya,

it's a little demon that climbs into your head, without you even knowing that he's there.....

My first AF Saturday was the longest day of my life. It was only then that I realised how alcohol had become the basis for everything I did outside of work.

Haha, at 44 years of age, I solved that by finding the world's biggest toyshop, and playing with everything that caught my interest ......