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    #1

    Day 1

    Mad at myself for giving in after 33 awesome days being AF. I have no idea what got into me, my day started out real good and grateful to be AF, then I took down the Christmas tree and all the Christmas decorations, cleaned and then took my kids shopping to spend their gift cards, all I could think about was the white wine, that our friends brought over on Christmas Eve, so when I got home I told myself just one glass, funny thing is as I was pouring the wine, I was feeling horrible, so why I drank it, I have no idea. I ended up drinking 41/2 glasses of the crap. Woke up this morning with an enormous headache and terrible guilt of giving in. The last time I caved was when I decorated the whole house for Christmas, which was a week before Thanksgiving, we were going away for Thanksgiving and I didn't want to have to decorate when we got back. I am thankful though that I made it through Christmas AF, the best Christmas so far because I went AF. My next goal will be to make it past 33 days and I will do it.

    Twosox
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    #2
    Day 1

    :l Twosox

    You caved a little but didn't blow 33 days AF. They're YOURS. And yours alone.
    A little road block that made you stumble. That's it. On to day 34. You're doing great - keep going!
    Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

    Winning since October 24th, 2013

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      #3
      Day 1

      2 Sox, I've been there, and I know how that feels. Lousy. As you point out, you know you can do this... why make it so much harder by keeping alcohol in the house? You notice now that you spent quite a bit of time fantasizing about the wine before you drank it... that's a strong indicator that, at this stage in your recovery at least, it's not such a good idea to have it sitting around in your home, calling out to you... What do you think?

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        #4
        Day 1

        I fucked up 2...

        Did all the right things..
        then just drank..

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          #5
          Day 1

          hay TwoSox,
          Sunshine is right, you still own those 33 days, we all stumble, but if you can pick yourself up & keep on the journey, then thats what counts, you can think of it as progress. I think that our attitude towards our slipups is as important as our attitude towards being AF, we are all human & we all makes mistakes, & then we face a choice were we can either #A, pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off & keep walking one step after the other towards our AF goal's. or #B, let the slip up put us back ware we started from - not moving forward, just stagnating. It sounds like you have chosen #A!!!
          keep it up, good luck
          XX
          *Witchy*
          Progress, not perfection!!!
          A craving wont kill me, but drinking could!!!

          Comment

            #6
            Day 1

            veritas;503862 wrote: I fucked up 2...

            Did all the right things..
            then just drank..
            Veritas... The most important thing you can do right now is to look back and change what you just said... figure out what you will do differently, next time, in a similar situation.

            There is always another, different "right thing to do" to keep you on track. Maybe, in this case, it is simply deciding not             to "just drink," and do something else, instead...

            Read through the "Tool Box" thread (more than once or twice!). There are about a zillion "right things to do" in there...

            If you allow yourself to see it as hopeless, then it will become hopeless, for you... Don't go there, OK?

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              #7
              Day 1

              I sense a 'strong' will there. Thats a HUGE/MASSIVE good sign.... for you!
              I know how you feel, cuz last christmas, I went from.... 3rd Jan, to 19th march without a drop of alcohol. (Thats an amazing accomplishment for me) .And then... stupidly (with an AA member. .....can you believe it??), picked up a drink again. ...I have not, put it down again since.

              I have a plan in place tho now. Not gonna reveal it yet, cuz I am .....well, a little over protective of it at the min. But It is my last resort and only hope.

              Good luck tho hon, and I wish you well


              regards


              Step


              XxxxxX
              Lead me not into temptation, I can find the way myself!!!

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                #8
                Day 1

                Hi Wip, I wish I could get rid of all the AL in the house, but husband drinks to, he definitely would not be to happy if I did that. I just need to take control of my thoughts and not let them take control of me.


                Twosox

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                  #9
                  Day 1

                  Thank you all for your support and I'm not going to forget all the AF time I have and will have.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Day 1

                    I won't call that a relapse...more like a lapse in good judgment.
                    Eyes straight ahead at the prize...a sober life !!!
                    sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!

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