I have never felt as depressed as I do today

[mya]

I don't mean to bring anyone down but I feel like crap today and very dressed. I know that DH knows that I have been drinking today and yes I have I drank what was left of the News years beer and I'm glad it took my three days instead of one. I'm such a loser. He left to the gym and he know and I just feels very helpless, my oldest son is at work and youngest is at a friends I'm alone and feel very alone would they even care?

[ezzmae]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Why did you have 3 instead of 1? That is what I did over Christmas when I drunk, I didn't even have the cravings, it was as if I was trying to sabotage my AF days. Why I don't know? I would say that the chemical reactions in the AL is making you feel worse about everything right now. You are feeling crap about yourself right now because you think you are weak. Stop drinking, go to bed, and tomorrow you will feel better and more importantly positive. Don't let negative feelings get you down, you had the drink, you cannot change that. What you can change is what you do for here on now. Keep strong.

[gyco]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

hi,they probably care but dont no what to do,thats why they go out,ask them,as mae said why not 1,AL.is like a sedative,the more you have the,the more absent minded you get,and yes they care,geico ask them

[A n d r e w]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

You are not a loser! You are on this site like the rest of us asking for help. Just because you drank again doesn't make you a loser. The important thing is that you came back here and are willing to talk about it. If it was that easy to quit the alchohol then this site wouldn't exist! Hang in there! Tomorrow the sun will rise and it will bring forth a new day.
You're OK.........Just keep trying.

[mya]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Thanks
I haven't had a drink in 4 hours but still feeling depressed, I know it's the alcohol but things went through my mind that I never thought would.
I wish I could go to be but I'm making dinner.
I just feel right now I have no one to talk to I feel that I can't turn to my friends here in my town, I guess I don't really trust anyone.
You guys are the only ones right now that I can turn to.

[A n d r e w]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Yes Mya,

You can trust us and you can talk with us. I know exactly what you mean about feeling alone. My circle of friends and family are all alchoholics and it's not easy for me to trust anyone either.
Keep coming back! There is always someone here to talk to.

[Rags]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Oh my dear Mya,
I understand the feelings you must be going through. Please, please don't think of yourself as a loser. The Christmas New Year season sees so many people drinking to excess, not just us who know and admit they have a problem! Booze is all around us at this time..... so tempting...... and people offering us drink after drink. Hey, like you say, it took 3 days rather than one day to get through the drink. So that is showing some restraint. So why not work from there?
So, finish making dinner, don't put any wine on the table, and maybe you can talk then. It may be a bit difficult, but maybe they do care but don't know how to approach you about it.
Be easy on yourself, try not to relive the remorse as that worsens everything, and keeps you in a vicious cycle of drink, feel guilty and depressed, so drink again. How many years was I on that treadmill!
Like Andrew says, tomorrow is a brand new day, and you have people here you can talk to and trust.
Totally irrelevant but makes me smile every time..... there's a sign outside a shop on my way home which says "SMILE....'CAUSE YOU CAN". It works.

[lil.michelle]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Oh hun!
First you are NOT a loser. Having drink in the house with anyone who has a problem is a HUGE no no. So GET RID OF IT.
Brush yourself off hun and start again! We've all been there, we've all screwed up! Drink makes you feel depressed. It is a depressant. It gives us a buzz for like an hour then makes our mood plumet.
NOW, let's have you starting again!

[kaponium]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Dear Mya - just dust yourself off, FORGIVE yourself COMPLETELY and get back in the sober driver's seat. The depression will pass - take yourself for a good bloody walk! I had a very down time on Christmas evening - I swear if the pubs had have been open I wouldn't have made it through. The depression DID pass, without being added to chemically! Alcohol IS a depressant, so just get that time AWAY from that last gobshite drink honey!

[cassy]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Hi Mya

dont beat yourself up..its easier said than done though.
do something nice for yourself today..go take a bubble bath and read something..go for a walk. clean out your old clothes..just anything to keep away from think booze boooze booze.

Its hard to get back to self respect but not impossible.

i,m on day one ago and hoping to do 30 days free and right now it only feels possible to plan today.
If this was my last day I dont want it to be experienced as a drunk!

Because I function and work I consider myself fortunate that so far my body has withstood this abuse..the damage is unseen though and I will die of shame if I get a drink related illnes.

Another reason to try and quit is to regain my inner peace as I know this isnt how God meant me to live my life.

i wish you well too and hope the day gets better.

Regards Cassy

[todsflove2]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

My dear Mya,

You are not a looser! We all understand where you are coming from. Keep talking to us.

I've been reading the other posts and it's all great advice.

I was watching a show with Dr. Oz and how he was trying to help people to loose weight and stop their eating addiction. Many of the people "fell off the wagon" and diverted from the program. What he said was you need to be in a program that is flexible enough so that if you fall off, you get right back on. He said not to beat yourself up because it's just a time-waster. And that most people don't suceed the first time around. He tried to keep motivating them to get back on the wagon.

We are here to help you. Keep trying. Let us know how you are feeling today.

:l

:h

Tina

[A Work in Progress]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

So, Mya, how are you today? I hope you're feeling better... and that you are putting together a good plan for recovery... you don't want to feel like this ever again, I'm sure...

[Beaches]

I have never felt as depressed as I do today

Yes Mya I was wondering how you were today as well. We have all been there and it's a terrible feeling. Hubbie was always disgusted when he knew I was drinking and now still seems disgusted even though I am not. HOWEVER I feel great. Stay Strong.