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My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

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    #16
    My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

    I am so sorry. This has to be so hard for you. :l

    Please know that you have us to lean on whenever you need it. You don't have to go through this 'alone'.

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      #17
      My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

      take comfort in your very own creed and know that you can stop your own son from having to go through what you did as a child...keep hugging him and yourself

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        #18
        My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

        I am so truly grateful for whatever force brought us together; I feel a real sense of healing because of all of you and have come to understand what was meant when I joined just two days ago...this is a place for healing, sharing, learning and eventually living again.

        I will return the attention ten fold, I promise.

        Namaste
        My creed; "Be the friend you seek, the spouse yours deserves and the Parent your children need"

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          #19
          My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

          i to remember sitting over a father who was tot,non emotions,my wife's family the same,i sympathise with you,maybe that's how he was tot,I've done a lot of research,there lives were much harder then ours,war babies,remember between 1918 and 1939 there were 2 world wars, depression,we ain't seen nothing,we've been pampered,spoiled and what ever else,i said positive thoughts this year,if my mom and dad were here today,id thank them both for the job they did,i wish you well,geico

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            #20
            My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

            AP, wise words from Bridge Savey & Beaches & all, I can only hope that you can feel some closure in hte factthat you are NOT repeating the past with your own son, i hope you find peace during this time.
            *Witchy*
            Progress, not perfection!!!
            A craving wont kill me, but drinking could!!!

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              #21
              My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

              Adian.......We all live in different situations. Our families break up for what ever reasons. I was a Army Brat....my father was gone for long periods of time because he was a soldier. Went overseas for a few years at a time. My mother ran our family. I really got to know my father when he retired and started working close to home. I recoqnized that he was a good man........and I loved him, I know what feelings are going through your heart. I watched my father die of cancer......he was home until my mother could'nt handle him anymore. He's my hero.....remember your father and what pleasure he brought to you. " Time heals all wounds " Take care.....IAD.
              ?Be who you are and say what you feel because
              those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.?
              Dr. Seuss

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                #22
                My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                My father died 6 years ago, I wanted a drink in a bad way. I just made myself say no. There are 2 things that happen when you get clean and sober , good one and a bad one.
                The good thing is that you get your feelings back.
                The bad things is that you get your feelings back.
                Does it make sense? It is a double edged sword...God bless you will be in my prayers....

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                  #23
                  My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                  Hey Aidenspappa. I was thinking about you today. How are you doing???? Please keep us posted. I was wondering, I know you are married with a son, is your wife supporting of you in these difficult times? Not to be noisy, I just hate to think of you alone.
                  I LOVE MY SEROTONIN AND BOOZE SCREWS IT UP!!!!!

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                    #24
                    My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                    Thank you all, so much

                    Hello,

                    Day 4 and Dad is still in the hospital and I am happy to say I had some sleep, real sleep, last night. I got an Mp3 player and spent my 'craving time' trying to download music. My wife was very understanding and let me alone and took care of Aidan most of the night (normall my time with him). Listening to music from the 80s brought back happier memories and reminded me of when I used to dream of being something when I was older; and for the first time I can recall...I liked who I have become. Outside of the mistakes with AL, I have found love and created love in its purest form in our child. Who knew...

                    I just want to thank all who have read and shared such love and concern; we truly are all connected.

                    To make sure I represent myself, I love my father. Always will. His pain and his isolated concentration on it has taught me a valuable lesson...to share your feelings; and for that I am eternally grateful. Life is not meant to be experienced alone, especially when suffering. When I go to the 'dark side of the moon' (get sad and feel loney, depressed, or sorry for loss) I mourn those good times playing catch, talking about sports, or when he would stop by and take me to a game. Thankfully, before his cancer, he met his grandson and we went to a baseball game (2006) and it is the photo from that day that hangs in my sons room. The memory will stay forever in my heart.

                    Namaste
                    My creed; "Be the friend you seek, the spouse yours deserves and the Parent your children need"

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                      #25
                      My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                      I'm so glad to hear you have good memories of your Dad, Namaste!! And that you love him...

                      That will not only help you forgive and accept, but will help rid you of the bad memories as time goes on. One day, it will be mostly those good things you'll remember... and you'll smile!

                      So glad to hear you got sleep and are doing better.
                      Sometimes you have to take the leap and build your wings on the way down... Anais Nin

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                        #26
                        My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                        There are many people on this site, who always have an open ear, and an open heart. Yes, we are connected in that way, that we can express and share our feelings when we need too. Stay strong for yourself and your precious son and wife. You and your family deserve a happy and blessed life.
                        I LOVE MY SEROTONIN AND BOOZE SCREWS IT UP!!!!!

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                          #27
                          My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                          i do wish you well,geico

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                            #28
                            My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                            I am so glad you got some sleep last night. Not sleeping doesn't help much during a stressful/sad time.

                            I think I can learn a lot from you. You see the good through the bad. It is something I need to work on. I am pretty negative ONLY because I have had to 'protect' myself all of my life. I love your way of thinking and your post truly brought a tear to my eye. You have such a good heart. True compassion.

                            All the best to you.

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                              #29
                              My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                              Hi Aidenspapa
                              thinking of you and thanks for wonderful thought for the day

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                                #30
                                My Father is Dying...and its killing me.

                                Hi hun.
                                I'm sooo sorry for all your pain. I wish i could do something to help you. If there is ANYTHING let me know! My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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