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Day 17 and I want to drink

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    Day 17 and I want to drink

    It's a snowy Friday night. A night that I used to enjoy sitting in front of a fire and having some drinks. It's been a good week except last night. Met with an AA temp sponsor for two hours. Basically, the AA approach appears to be meetings, meetings, and more meetings. I know I have a problem and heard alot of stuff I didn't want to hear. I get the feeling that anyone who drinks more than one drink has a problem. I'm so frustrated and confused. I don't want to drink because if I have one beer, it leads to 2,3,4,etc. If I don't drink and don't go to meetings I'm still what they call a dry drunk. So just going AF doesn't solve the problem.

    I've had 16, and almost 17 great days. I'm exercising, taking supps, eating right, and am ready to start the CD's. Then I talk to this guy and feel like I'm not doing enough. Not sure if MWO and AA are a good combination. It is probably the alcohol trying to sabotage my efforts. Looking for an excuse to rationalize drinking.

    Sorry to ramble on, don't know if this makes any sense to anyone. Anyway I'm going to put my tennis shoes on and go for a run in the snow. Hopefully, it'll kill my craving and help me get thru tonight AF.

    #2
    Day 17 and I want to drink

    i am feeling the same way... the beast is sabbatoging me today. he will not win yet his voice is loud. i have been thinking of going to AA myself but am just not sure if it would be right for me. Have fun on your run willie.
    I must suppress the beast within so I can find my way out of the darkness.
    sober since 2/4/12

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      #3
      Day 17 and I want to drink

      17 days that is awesome keep on going .. you are doing it.. why go back to where you were before .. just keep on doing what you are doing that the trick stay busy and think positive and yes for aa and mwo they both work take what you need from both and leave the rest.. keep on keeping on
      :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
      best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

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        #4
        Day 17 and I want to drink

        G'day Willie. Big congratulations on 17 day's! You're feeling great, looking great, etc..There are absolutely NO negatives about being alcohol free. It's all win win! AND, it keeps getting better. Sure, there are bumps along the way, but aren't there always?
        For me, i had to find the 'techniques'/tools, that work for me. We are all differently made up. What works for other's, may not work for you. Take what you need, as Tlrgs suggested.
        Have you read the 'Toolbox' thread? Good tip's for keeping off the sauce. It's in the 'Monthly abstinence' forum i think. Keep at it mate, you're doing really well!................G.

        'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

        Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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          #5
          Day 17 and I want to drink

          Hello Starfairy. Af since Christmas day is awesome! Keep busy, cravings/thoughts do pass..............G.

          'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

          Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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            #6
            Day 17 and I want to drink

            Don't use the AA guy as an excuse to drink! You're doing fine! AA is a good program in some ways, but remember that each member (and that includes all the people who like to be sponsors) is doing his/her own thing, and interpreting the AA stuff in the way he or she chooses to do... Some of them are clueless, some are wonderful... Same is true of individual AA groups... If you are going to have a sponsor, you need to choose someone you respect who will help you to stay accountable, and on track; not someone who preaches at you...

            Figure out what YOU want in your life... and use AA if there are some aspects that are helpful.

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              #7
              Day 17 and I want to drink

              17 days is awesome. Hope the run helped you think and realize what a great accomplishment this is. Each day gets better!!!

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                #8
                Day 17 and I want to drink

                Ireally hope you have managed to hang in there! I had a reallyrough few hours Thursday - usually I would have succumbed - but I jumped on here and it literally saved me from going back to square one AGAIN! Keep it up!
                *Serenity is the calm WITHIN the storm*

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                  #9
                  Day 17 and I want to drink

                  You are doing great! Keep at it. It is your brain playing tricks on you.

                  I had a couple of cravings over the last 26 hours. Yesterday I spoke to a family member and that helped big time. I talked my way through the mind games I was playing with myself. Today, another craving. I bought a chocolate bar. (so very not me!!! I don't eat junk food EVER) but it took the craving away immediately. It isn't a great habit to get into and I should of bought orange juice as it has the same affect.... just wanted sugar and wanted it fast!

                  I then took the money I would have spent today if I had of bought some wine.... and I would of probably cracked and bought some smokes (as they go hand in hand for me) I went to the petstore with my little one and we bought a small aquarium and a couple of really nice fish. Something to show for my money. Plus I think it would be a great hobby!

                  I feel so much better not giving into these. PLUS it seems to be helping my self confidence and self esteem not giving into the beast.

                  I am feeling so good and alive these days that I would be right pissed off if I blew it. Where would it get me anyway? Back to the struggle; yet again.

                  Take care; you are doing great!

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                    #10
                    Day 17 and I want to drink

                    Thanks for all the advice and encouragement. It helped alot. I made it thru Day 17. Tommorrow is a new day !

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