We did have some fun together earlier but now I am here and wasted--I need a Day 1, 5, 15, 50. Why would I do this? Enlighten me.
My siblings are pissed at me that I won't contact my mother. I will send emails and cards.
I wonder if Husband knows i am trashed right now--will I just LIE AGAIN and say I took an allergy pill..or a pain pill ? Or just say that my session with the therapist was so traumatic I needed bed (true, actually)....The last night I drank he did not refer to it directly--just said the next day--wow, you slept heavy last night. DUH! Speak up!
:upset::durn:
WHY am I such a freaking liar and loser and dumb ass..I KNOW I can NOT drink even one....I really do NOT want to be the raging mean drunk bith my mom is. I do not want my children to hate me and be ashamed. yet here i am.
But of course hubs is downstairs watching freaking TV and may not even know I exist.
I think I may totally suck as a sober human person.
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